Chilly Boulder Ice Creamery: Tuesday morning

[needsaparrot]

The scary thing is that Xander had only been guessing they would have a Twinkie Split Sundae; he'd been fully prepared to order the closest thing on the menu and provide his own Twinkies for himself and Mel. But no, it was right there beneath the cake batter and the peanut butter fudge brownie ripple.
___

[OOC: Xander's here for cantjossme, but Chilly Boulder is open for all your indecently-sugary dairy needs.]

Comments

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Can I have my twinkie sundae with the cake batter and peanut butter fudge brownie ripple as well?" Mel asked as she stared at the menu.

[needsaparrot]

"You're scary. I like that in a Slayer."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Hey. I'm just trying to gather my energy to fight evil," Mel smirked.

[needsaparrot]

"You could take on an entire zombie horde with that much energy." Xander pointed the cashier towards the ice cream flavors Mel had listed. "I approve."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Hey! Maybe Bridge's parents are really evil zombies in disguise!" Mel suggested with a bounce. "Want me to come along in case they need to be dismembered?"

[needsaparrot]

".....I think as ways to make a bad impression go, bringing somebody along to dismember your boyfriends parents is pretty high up there." Which is not to say he wasn't thinking about it. Less in case of zombies in disguise and more in case of PLZ PROTECT ME.

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Only if they're zombies," Mel promised. "You can say I'm your over-protective little sister."

Then she tried to think of a cover story for the axe scythe.

"Who's also a lumberjack."

[needsaparrot]

"Hmm." Xander considered this cover story. "Can you sing the Lumberjack Song?"

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"I thought lumberjacks just cut down trees," Mel said looking suspicious. "I have to sing now too?"

[needsaparrot]

"There's sooooooo much to being a lumberjack that you don't know," Xander said, shaking his head and paying for their sundaes. He got the cake batter and peanut butter fudge brownie ripple too - no point in taking the risk of mixing them up and accidentallye ating Mel's sundae. "There's the shopping, the scones..."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Scones?" Mel asked looking confused. "Why do you need scones to chop down trees?"

[needsaparrot]

"You have 'em for tea!"

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"This is one of the cultural context things that I'm missing out on being Ms. Future Girl, isn't it?"

[needsaparrot]

"It's mostly lumberjack context you're missing out on by not knowing the song," Xander told her, snagging a seat and setting both sundaes down. "Nobody's gonna buy you as a lumberjack if you can't sing it on request."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"How about if every time someone asks me to sing the song I just go chop down a tree?" Mel suggested as she dug into the ice cream.

[needsaparrot]

"You'd have a lot of firewood, and probably some pissed-off squirrels."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Squirrels? I can handle squirrels," Mel replied. "Unless they too are zombies."

[needsaparrot]

"You can't handle zombie squirrels?" Xander took a bite of his sundae and lost all ability to speak or indeed process incoming signals for a moment. "I am the suckiest Watcher ever."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Well I could handle them, but wouldn't Zombie squirrels just eat other squirrel's brains?" Mel asked and then paused to the let her ice cream headache pass. "And why am I thinking that our next holographic training session is going to feature zombie woodland creatures?

[needsaparrot]

"We had a zombie cat back home once. Uh, not as a pet. It didn't seem real particular about whose brains it was trying to eat." Why no, scenarios were not running through Xander's mind at all. Whatever would make her think that?

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"How'd you take the cat out?" Mel asked. "Did you leave out a bowl of tender vittles with some squirrel brain in it?"

[needsaparrot]

Xander snorted. "We put it in a cage before it started getting too rambunctious, and it went back to being dead when Buffy killed the head zombie-demon that was causing all the trouble."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"So for future reference what does a head zombie-demon look like?"

[needsaparrot]

"Well, in that case, somebody wearing a freaky-looking African mask. I'll see if I can hunt up a picture of it just in case. If it's not on my computer, I bet Giles has one." Xander took another bite of ice-cream soaked Twinkie, then took a moment to reflect on why the universe was an essentially benevolent place. Then he added, "But not all zombies come from freaky masks. The ones that invaded here just seemed to show up."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"So the plan would be just to slice and dice until otherwise directed by whoever to whatever the source might be?"

[needsaparrot]

"Fire is also good. Slicing leaves you lots of body parts still flopping around. Little flame and some gasoline sends 'em right up."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

Mel frowned a little bit. "What about holy water? Does beheading work?"

[needsaparrot]

"Holy water not so much. Beheading's better." Xander gestured with his spoon. "Or smoosh the brain. That usually works."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Mmmm. Brain smoosh," Mel said as she takes a giant bite of ice cream. "Makes that crunchy noise followed by that squish. Always fun."

[needsaparrot]

"Kind of like eating fried ice cream." Gross was gross, but at some point you just got used to things that made squishy noises when you killed them.

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

Mel blinked. "You can fry ice cream?"

[needsaparrot]

"They wrap a ball of ice cream in a pastry shell and then flash deep-fry it so the pastry cooks, but the ice cream stays cold," he explained.

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"Do they have that here?" Mel said now looking back at the menu. "And can they fry a twinkie while they are at it?"

[needsaparrot]

"I don't know if they have fried ice cream here - usually they serve it at Mexican places." Xander scanned the menu. "Most regular ice cream parlors wouldn't have a deep-fryer. Which yeah, you can totally deep-fry a Twinkie in."

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

"I'm totally tracking down a place where they have that stuff," Mel declared. "Thank god for a slayer metabolism."

[needsaparrot]

Xander looked down at his half-empty bowl, then at his stomach. "...Which I don't have." He sighed.