fandomtownies | Our Lady of Fandom, Thursday

Something was decidedly odd about Castiel, today. More so than usual, in fact. For one thing, instead of standing stock still at the front of the church throughout the entire service, he instead seemed to be swaying slightly and nodding his head, as though to some unheard music. His tie had come off at some point, and more buttons on his shirt were open than was usual. His trench coat was missing. And perhaps most disturbing of all, he was smiling.

If it weren't for the fact that he was standing behind the pulpit, someone might notice that this was probably due to the fact that he had a gremlin on his leg, gnawing cheerfully away. The gremlin's venom, it seemed, was affecting Castiel much in the way that certain drugs were known to affect people.

In other words, he was higher than a freaking kite.

He seemed to start his sermon in the middle.

"So, in this way, we're each a fragment of total perception. Just -- just one compartment. In that dragonfly eye of group mind. Now, the key to this total -- total -- shared perception. It can be . . . surprisingly physical."

Someone should possibly stop him.

[ooc: OCD is ~~coming~~ up. And yes, I'm totally riffing gremlin-bit!Cass from 5x04 - The End. I love this canon. For serious.]

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Such as it is.

Or, you know, try to, at least.

Yeah, so I coulda saved this for AU weekend, but it turns out I'm not that patient.

Also, OMG, I'VE BEEN IN THIS GAME OFF AND ON SINCE '06 AND THIS IS THE FIRST TIME ONE OF MY CHARACTERS HAS BEEN GREMLIN BIT.

...

Arthur hadn't realised it was possible for Castiel's sermons to make less sense, but apparently he had been woefully mistaken.

This would be his WTF is up, yo face, people.

Chuck didn't know whether to sit back and laugh or try to do something.

Maybe he'd just look confused first. That seemed like a good plan.

~~Fine, LJ, eat my comment. See if I care~~

Chuck was tempted to just let this go on and possibly film the whole thing because this was just hilarious. But that conscience thing kicked in and he decided it was his duty as a friend to try to stop this. So after a few minutes of staring he approached Castiel. Slowly. Because he was acting crazyflakes.

"Uh...hey, Cass. You alright?"

Cass looked over and griiiiiiiinned. "The playboy! I'm well, Chuck, how are you?"

He seemed rather intent on the answer to that last question.

Francine's WTF face couldn't be more obvious if it came with helpful scrolling commentary.

The terrifying part was where after listening to him for a while, she actually had kind of a suspicion in the right direction, if slightly, as usual, off-base.

Oh dear god.

"I'm...good," he said slowly. "Though I don't think I'm as good as you are right now. Have you been talking to Andy again?"

That would be a Francine-finger poking him on the shoulder from the pew behind him. "Did you do that?" she hissed, pointing past his ear to the pulpit.

IT IS A GOOD FIRST BITE. :D

"Oh god, I wish I did that," Chuck said as he turned around. "Whatever he's on, I didn't give it to him."

Andy. Castiel missed Andy.

"I haven't seen him." He looked around. "Is he here?"

Thanks!

Sam totally needs to meet gremlin-bit!Cass, ja? *flutters eyelashes*

"Not at the moment, no. Are you sure you're okay? You're..." Chuck made a vague gesture towards Castiel's open shirt. "...you're wearing less clothes than usual."

Of course that would be what Chuck focused on.

Castiel glanced down. "The tie is very constricting." He looked back up. "I am feeling very well. A bit like I'm floating." It was entirely pleasant, and reminded Castiel of the days before he had to rescue Dean from the Pit. "Everything is so beautiful, isn't it?"

Oh no, you've discovered my weakness against eyelash fluttering! ;)

The best part is if you picture Misha actually doing the fluttering.

Sam had a lot of questions about the books he'd found in the library, even without actually looking at them, and he forgot every single one as he watched Castiel's attempt at a sermon.

"Um," he said, staring. Yeah, that was as far as he could get at the moment.

"Sam Winchester," Castiel said when he spotted him. "Haven't been drinking any demon blood, have you?" And then he laughed.

Kind of a lot.

"Oh yeah, everything's lovely," he said, looking amused. Chuck figured this is probably what he looked like whenever he was on V. But he knew better than to think Castiel would drink vampire blood for fun. Maybe he had been eating the mushrooms in the cemetery again. "I'm glad you're feeling all floaty."

"Haven't...what?" Sam asked, somehow managing to stare harder. "No, I...are you okay?" That didn't seem as stupid of a question before he'd actually said it.

Castiel leaned in a bit, as though he were about to tell Chuck a secret.

Actually, he was just going for his usual invasion of personal space.

"I love you, Chuck."

Or maybe a hug?

Castiel made a show of thinking this over. "Yes. I'm very okay. Though my leg tickles."

Yes, that's right, the gremlin attempting to gnaw his leg off tickled.

"And how are you?"

"I'm okay too, I guess," he said. "Though not as okay as you seem to be. You didn't by any chance eat something that Chuck gave you, did you? Maybe right around the time you lost your coat?"

What? He looked weird without it.

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Our Lady of Fandom, Thursday

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