Freedom Arms | Tuesday

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

If anyone asked, the glass of whisky York was carrying around today at work was iced tea. Just iced tea. Also the copy of Sports Illustrated he was reading was actually an inventory list.

He had no idea why he was making excuses in his head when he owned the place but he had them ready.

[OCD-free]

Comments

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

It could have been due to the seriously judgemental former coworker of his that would occasionally stop by. Just a guess.

"Do you ever actually work?"

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"I am working," he said. "I'm waiting for a customer."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"It looks like you're catching up on Grifball, actually."

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"They don't report on Grifball here," York said. "Though it looks like the Mets might be going to the World Series for once."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"...that sounds fake." What next, the Cubs getting there too?

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"I know, I know, but it's true," he said. "I couldn't believe it myself."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"Wow. At least we know now it's definitely an alternate universe we're in."

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"Hey, the Mets aren't that bad." Of course he'd only say that about a New York team.

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"They really are." He didn't even know the sorts teams from Washington. Because he was the worst.

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

York rolled his eyes. "You don't even know how sports work."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"I do too." In theory.

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"Uh huh." He did not believe that at all. "That a skill you learned sometime I left the Freelancers?"

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

Wash sighed like he couldn't handle these slurs against his good name. "I could have learned it since then, yes."

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"Which sport?" he asked.

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"Baseball?" No, Wash. No.

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"Name one baseball player that's currently playing," he said. "On any team."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"Tim... Tebow?"

Totally wrong sport. In no way was he going to get this one right.

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

York just burst out laughing.

Delta was at least nice enough to flicker in and correct Wash. "Tim Tebow plays American football, Agent Washington."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"Oh, go fuck yourself." A beat. "Not you, Delta. Just York."

BECAUSE YES, HE KNEW DELTA WAS INCAPABLE OF SUCH THINGS, OKAY?

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"It is physically impossible for York to fornicate with himself." Oh Delta was taking this as literally as possible.

Which made York laugh even more.

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

DAMN IT, DELTA.

"Thanks, Delta."

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

York caught his breath. "Man, you suck!"

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

Wash flipped him off, leaning against the counter. "And it's such a wonder why you don't have customers."

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"I don't treat all my customers like I treat you."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"I swear to god, if you say I'm special, I'm going to punch you in the dick."

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"You're not special you're just a dick," York said amicably. "I mean, I guess you are special depending on the definition..."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"It was part of the criteria to get recruited," Wash shot back.

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"I dare you to tell somebody like Tex that she's special."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"Then I'd have to be around someone like Tex. And not be dead."

So.

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"Good point," he said. "She wasn't your biggest fan."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

Which was weird because Wash was charming.

"...wait, she said that?"

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"Pretty sure she thought you were a wuss."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"I wasn't a wuss."

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"Kind of were." It was way too easy to tease Wash.

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

It really was. If you were a Freelancer.

"No. I was not." Rude, rude man.

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"Agree to disagree."

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

"I have no idea why I stop by here."

[no-i-in-york.livejournal.com]

"To see my handsome face?" he suggested.

[worstofalltime.livejournal.com]

Wash shook his head, making a little bit of a face at York. "No, that doesn't sound right at all."