Devil's Nest | Sunday Evening

[long_memory]

It had been a long, long time since Silver had an actual job but he had been in bars a whole lot since then so he was pretty confident he couldn't mess this up. Sure, he probably wouldn't be as enticing as Max when it came to tending bar but he also didn't have her breasts and French accent so he was at a disadvantage there.

He figured all he had to do was make sure no fights broke out and not get too sloshed off rum. Pretty easy compared to being the face of a war against England.

[Open, OCD-free]

Comments

[ohvalleyofpenis]

Ah, but was he willing to give discounts to dashing bards like Jaskier always hoped the bartenders would when he graced them with his presence?

"Oh, you're new," Jaskier said as he sauntered on into the bar.

[long_memory]

John Silver gave discounts to no one unless it benefited him. Or if you scared him enough.

"It's my first night on the job," he confirmed with a nod. "I'm guessing you're a regular."

A very flamboyantly dressed regular. Thought the man covered in jewelry.

[ohvalleyofpenis]

Well. Jaskier wasn't really the intimidating type. He just hoped his pretty face would see him through to the end.

"I certainly like to think I'm on my way to regular," he said. "Jaskier."

[long_memory]

"John Silver," he said. "What can I get you and please be merciful and don't make it too complicated."

[ohvalleyofpenis]

"So, I suppose a martini is out." Look, he liked vodka. "How about the local ale? I don't think I've tried that yet."

[long_memory]

"That I can manage." Luckily everything was close enough behind the bar that Silver didn't really need his crutch to move about. He just hopped around on his good leg with the grace of someone who had to do this at sea regularly. "I believe I'll grab one for myself as well."

Mostly because Eric had been good to him and he didn't want to clear the place out of rum just yet.

[ohvalleyofpenis]

"We can drink together then," Jaskier said with a wink.

[long_memory]

Silver had been winked at many a time, especially back before he grew out his beard and he looked like Flint's personal cabin boy. So he took it in stride and accepted that was going to be a part of the job.

"I haven't actually tried the ale yet so if it's garbage it's not my fault," he said, placing a glass in front of Jaskier.

[ohvalleyofpenis]

So, what the narrative was saying was that Jaskier totally had a chance here, right?

"I have been to establishments where the ale was of dubious origin, but this place has yet to let me down."

He didn't know about Bud Lite Lime. So. That was on him.

[long_memory]

"That's good to know," he said, taking a swig from his own glass. "I've spent a lot of time at sea so I've had more questionable alcohol than I care to admit."

Grog. So much grog.

[ohvalleyofpenis]

Please never inflict grog on Jaskier. He was delicate. Also, it would be gross.

"What brings you to this fine island, John Silver?" he asked, taking a sip of his own and finding it to not be completely terrible.

[long_memory]

"The ocean did. Violently," he said. "I'm only now starting not to smell like a dock."

Thanks to learning what showers were and finding himself fascinated with floral scented shampoo. Do you see these curls? Luxurious was what they were, the bottle promised him so.

[ohvalleyofpenis]

They were!

"Ah! Well, I suppose it's better than being kidnapped by a goat person of unknown origin. In a way?"

[long_memory]

"Ah, yes, I would say my situation was a lot better," he said. "Was it a person that was actually part goat or a person that just looked like a goat?"

He was learning to ask these questions the longer he was on the island.

[ohvalleyofpenis]

"Is there much of a difference there?" he had to ask.

[long_memory]

Silver thought about that for a moment. "I suppose in the end there isn't. Traumatizing either way."

[ohvalleyofpenis]

Jaskier spread his hands in a 'thank you' gesture because John here got it. Even if Jaskier had been part of the 'seduce Krampus to escape' plan. "Of course, this place isn't too awful. The music is absolutely wonderful."

[long_memory]

You know what? Silver could respect that. If seduction had been on the table in any life situation he was presented with he would have taken it. Alas, it wasn't meant to be.

"I'm afraid I have no ear for music," he said. "Aside from the drunken sea shanty or two."

[ohvalleyofpenis]

He was too busy looking scruffy to seduce goat men, huh?

Jaskier gasped in both mock and real horror. "We will certainly have to change that, my friend. I am a bard by trade, song is my bread and butter."

[long_memory]

Lord, Silver was going to live to regret this, wasn't he?

"Is there a lot of money in that sort of thing?" he asked.

[ohvalleyofpenis]

"If you have talent, of course there is!" Or find a sugar mama/daddy to pay for your things.

[long_memory]

Don't ask, don't ask, don't ask--

"Well do you have talent?" Fuck.

[ohvalleyofpenis]

YOU ASKED FOR IT.

"Would you like to hear a song?"

[long_memory]

God. Damn. It.

Silver figured he brought this on himself, and it would have been pretty awful to disappoint a customer his first day on the job. "If it's not too much trouble, don't feel like you have to."

[ohvalleyofpenis]

"Now, would you like something I've heard since I've been here or an original composition?" Yeah, you know you wanna hear a lute cover of literally anything by Britney Spears, buddy.