fandomtownies | The Perk - Thursday Afternoon

Entry tags:

$perk

The Perk - Thursday Afternoon

The full effect of a week without classes was finally settling in to Wilson and he enjoyed a fairly lazy morning waking up with the angel and ... well ... doing absolutely nothing. He'd seen flyers about and heard whispers on the wind that students were off on different jaunts here and there so when Phale took himself off to his study to ~~brood~~ research some 'things' Wilson grabbed a book, left his lover a note telling him where he was and headed down to the Perk ~~to brood~~.

Ordering some of the angel's favorite apple spice tea, just to see what it was that so intrigued his lover about the stuff, Wilson settled into a deep chair by the window and flipped open the medical journal he'd brought down with him. However, he soon found himself slipping into a contemplative state as he sipped on his tea and watched the sun reflecting off the puddles just outside the window.

[ooc: open to poke at the doctor or for your own Perky needs!

ETA: That Phale met up with Wilson is okay to broadcast but their conversation is now NFB. :)]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

He seems off in his own little world, but perfectly disturbable.

Eventually, Aziraphale managed to work himself out of his funk, and began to feel a little guilty about leaving Wilson to have to spend the afternoon alone. So he tucked a newspaper under his arm and headed down to the Perk.

Spotting the young doctor at his sesat near the window, he gave a little smile and walked over.

"Would you mind a little bit of company, my dear?"

Drawn, almost immediately out of his thoughts by the sound of his lover's voice, Wilson turned towards him and smiled with warm, affectionate welcome.

"Hey there. Not at all...heck, I even have a little pot of your favorite." He offered, nodding Phale towards the tea pot shaped like an apple, currently emmitting yummy apple spice tea scents.

"Smells wonderful, love," the angel replied, taking a seat and leaning over to brush a kiss to Wilson's cheek. "I've been thinking...how do you feel about a trip to Baltmore tomorrow to see Miss Parker's band? She told me about it at the party. We could drive out tomorrow afternoon and coming back Saturday morning."

"You mean, Teal Dear?" Wilson said, pouring Phale a cup of the tea, then sitting back with his own.

"That could be fun, love." Wilson agreed, though he grinned impishly. "Especially if this is just you using a good excuse to get a ride in my car."

"It's possible," the angel agreed, Wilson's grin bringing out a warm smile of his own. "I went a whole year without the chance to ride in your car, you know."

They needed a little bit of an out of town trip, he thought. Both had things on their minds that they could use the break from.

"Yeah, I think we've been making up for that over the past few months." Wilson pointed out with a wicked gleam in his eye.

Sighing softly, he stared at the angel for a long minute, then looked around the quiet shop.

"Seems everyone is out today, enjoying the weather but would you mind..." He made a vague hand motion, the universal request to soundproof the area from nosey squirrels.

"Perhaps just a little bit," the angel chuckled. But Wilson's request surprised him, and worried him a little. Raising an eyebrow, Aziraphale nodded. "What's wrong, James?"

Most of the time, Wilson well earned his reputation of having a brilliant bed side manner and a smooth way of approaching any and all subjects, no matter how awkward or distressing.

Sometimes, he just jumped in the middle of it and started to swim.

"Saturday night. I...I did something and I'm having a hard time reconciling myself to it."

"Something to do with Mr Dornez?" the angel asked softly, knowing there wasn't much else that could have been holding Wilson's attention on Saturday. He moved his chair a little closer, and gave the young doctor his full attention.

"Tell me, James love."

Sitting forward so that he could lower his voice and also cradle his tea cup in between his hands, arms resting along his thighs, Wilson took a sip before he began to talk.

"When House suffered his infraction, he was advised to give consent to amputate the leg due to the health risks. He refused. He was certain he could survive it. After the initial surgery, he was in horrific pain, his body shut down and he arrested. They brought him back and he made the decision to be put into a medically induced coma."

Another little sip of tea.

"While he was out, his girlfriend, Stacy, held his medical proxy and against his wishes but out of the genuine belief it was the only thing that would save his life, she gave the consent to remove the damaged thigh muscle. House, never truly forgave that betrayal."

Rocking the cup back and forth in his hands, Wilson stared down into the swirling liquid.

"Walter was dying. His own body was eating itself up and the best we could do was slow the progression. But...somehow, those connected with Walter, Nadia and that boy, Schrondinger...they contacted someone, a doctor who sent through a device he said would fix the problem. The thing is, it had to be injected into Walter's brain."

Polishing off the tea, Wilson set it aside and ran his hands through his hair.

"I asked Nadia, if this was what Walter would want...because...I don't know, Aziraphale...nothing about it seemed kosher but...she said she didn't want him to die, that he couldn't die and, he was dying ... "

Looking up at the angel, Wilson gave a little slightly defeated shrug.

"And, now he's not dying anymore." He said softly. Leaving little doubt as to what decision he made.

"And that's your job, James," Aziraphale replied, his voice gentle but firm. "It isn't your job to decide when it's right for someone to die, or to live. It's your job to do what you can, when you can do it, to help them. You may think that Gregory's girlfriend made the wrong decision, and perhaps so does Gregory. But was the alternative better? Is it better to die than to live and have to adjust to changes? You can't know what might come after for your patient. It isn't right to put a decision like that on a doctor's shoulders.'"

He took Wilson's hand, and held it tightly. You were given a way to help, and you asked Mr Dornez's friend to speak for him. She did, and now he's recovering, because you did your job. Don't second guess that decision, love. Better to give someone a second chance at a life even if you're not sure they want it, than to step away and give them nothing at all. Not treating him might have meant his death. Would that decision have weighed on you less heavily?"

Wilson returned the tight hold of his lover's hand as he looked over at Phale and shook his head slightly.

"I wish I could see it that way, love but...Aziraphale, I work in a field where there comes a point that quality of life has to outweight life itself. When living becomes a living hell for the being..." Wilson trailed off, not really want to get into that discussion.

"What if I've killed Walter, regardless? I put something in his brain, Raphale. What's to keep it from altering who Walter is? Skewing him into something even he no longer recognizes? Any time you do anything with the brain, you risk these sorts of effects and that's just with an in and out job...let alone leaving some, unknown device behind."

"Then...you accept your decision and its conclusion."

This was the hard part of what Aziraphale did. Sometimes they answers weren't good ones, or ones that anyone wanted to hear.

"Your choice was based on your desire to help and heal, James. If it was the wrong choice, still it was made from your heart, with best interests of your patient in mind." He tilted his head and look deep into Wilson's eyes. "Do you think you should have done differently? If you were given a second chance, would you change your mind?"

Now if that wasn't a question Wilson had asked himself many, many...too many times.

"I don't know." He said, truthfully standing and pacing to the window in an effort to bleed off some tension.

"Then...let me tell you what I think. You don't make these decisions on an impulse. You weigh all the information, and you choose what you think will be the best route to take. Perhaps later you'll try and second guess, worry and wonder and fret. But I trust your judgement. And so do your patients, or they wouldn't be your patients. Perhaps Mr Dornez won't have the quality of life he may have had before his illness, but he will have a life. Before you begin to think that you've done him a disservice, why not ask him how he views the quality of that life? Why not ask Miss Santos whether she believes you made the wrong choice?"

Wilson shook his head.

"I...no. They're kids, they don't need me picking at their wounds with my insecurities." Wilson said softly, setting his hands on his hips and standing quietly at the window.

"The students here aren't just kids," Aziraphale reminded him. "And it's rather likely eventually someone's going to pick up on your insecurities. Just ask Mr Dornez how he's doing, and whether he wants to talk. I expect if he's unhappy, he'll tell you so."

He wished they hadn't chosen a public venue for this conversation now. Aziraphale wanted to put his arms around the young doctor and tell him that he hadn't made a mistake, and that even he had, it was all right.

"It's all right to make mistakes," he said softly. "You told me once that I'm not supposed to be perfect. Which means that neither are you. Mistakes are inevitable. But James love...I don't believe that this was one of them."

Standing, silently for a few more moments, Wilson eventually turned back towards the angel and asked softly.

"So. I've told you mine...going to tell me yours?" He asked softly.

He wasn't pushing off his lover's advice but sometimes, needed to just process for a bit and it hadn't escaped his attention that someone, hot and angelic, was also struggling.

Okay, it was true that Aziraphale had been hoping they could stay away from that topic, but he should have known better. Looking down at the cup of tea in his hands, he sighed.

"I saw Belthazor the other day, and he told me that Raynor had contacted him. Had set him a mission to recover part of an amulet from a witch, whom he was supposed to kill. And to force his hand, it seems Raynor has managed to come into possession of Belthazor's father's soul."

He looked up Wilson, his eyes dark with quiet anger. "I told Belthazor that I would do whatever I could to help him, if he wanted help."

That...was not what Wilson was expecting and he could only stand there before turning to look out the window.

"We really are your pawns." He said softly, his tone lost and pensive and perhaps he was unaware that he'd spoken aloud.

In a louder tone, he said. "Of course, hopefully... I mean, I hope you can help him, love. Just...just tell me what it is you need from me, if you can."

Quiet understanding, unspokenly exchanged that he would understand if Aziraphale needed to do things or hold Bel's secrets away from even the young doctor himself.

"He asked me to stop him. From killing the witch. He asked that to my favor to him, to do what I could not to let him carry through with it."

The words were spoken in a low, soft tone, emotionless and even. The angel's gaze had fallen, back to his tea again, although he wasn't drinking it.

"I told him I would do whatever was necessary."

Turning from the window, Wilson didn't even pretend that this was anything other than what he could see in his lover's face and he walked over to the angel.

As they were in public, he laid his hand on his lover's shoulder, looking down at the top of his head.

"And in doing so, you'll save Phoebe having to." He said softly.

"I know." Aziraphale raised one hand and laid it over Wilson's. "I told him...I didn't think it made him evil, if he killed in order to save his father. But he thinks it does, and that's worth more than what I think. And I don't Phoebe to be put into the middle of this any more than she already is. I don't want Belthazor to have to do something he believes will damn him."

He rubbed his other hand over his face. "Let's go home, love?"

Simply nodding, Wilson gripped Phale's hand until his lover had come to his feet. Picking up his book, he kept this hands linked together as they walked to the door.

For the moment, there were no more words. There was nothing Wilson could say that would make any of either of these situations better so it was best to simply give up the words entirely and fall back on the one thing that would help.

Being together.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

The Perk - Thursday Afternoon

Poke at Wilson

Re: Poke at Wilson

Re: Poke at Wilson

Re: Poke at Wilson

Re: Poke at Wilson

Re: Poke at Wilson

Re: Poke at Wilson

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now

Re: Poke at Wilson - NFB Now