The Fourth Sin, Friday Night

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

Jarod was making two lists. One was his Christmas/Holiday shopping list:

GOB
Becky
Miho
Broots
Parker
Isabel
Lana
Jaye

The other was his list of things to do around the Sin:

Fix DVD player in downstairs bathroom. Again.
Attach jingle bells to volunteer. Use ribbon, not tape.
Relace trampoline.
Shampoo couch.
Shampoo carpeting on floor next to couch.
Find out who's been leaving neon body part prints all over the Sin.
Convince them to use water-soluble paint.
Clean counter in downstairs bathroom. Turpentine?

Hopefully he wouldn't combine the two.

Comments

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

GOB walked into the Sin wearing sunglasses and a cap. "Excuse-a me-a," GOB said, attempting to be incognito. He thought that meant "with an Italian accent." He also thought this was a good Italian accent.

GOB was wrong about a lot of things.

"I'm-a looking to put-a some hookers on reserve for-a Christmas Day. -A."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

Jarod had almost gotten used to this kind of thing from his employer. He pulled out the appointment book and ignored the accent. "How many and what time?"

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"I-a need nove hookers," GOB said. He added in a whisper, "That means 'nine.' For the night-a."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"Nine? Really?" He looked very skeptical. "Are costumes involved? And are you going to want to watch? Because that's extra."

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

GOB lifted his sunglasses and whispered, "Is it safe? Are there people who will kill me around?" And then, just in case Jarod hadn't figured it out yet, he said, "I'm GOB."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"Yes, you are GOB." Jarod was happy to have that issue resolved. "And, um, I don't know about the first question. I'm safe enough."

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

GOB looked around and was convinced that there might be ninjas, but there weren't any Beckys around. That was good enough for the moment. "I need the girls for Becky's Christmas gift. It's going to be great!"

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"You're giving Becky nine employees she already has for Christmas?" Jarod decided to try and help GOB not get killed. "Wouldn't it be better to give her nine regular customers, instead? I mean, just as an example?"

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"No, it has to be the girls. It'll mean more," GOB said. "They can dance, right?"

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"Um...does swaying rhythmically count?"

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"That should be fine," GOB said. "The song says nothing about how good the dancing has to be."

"Say, will you be showing up to work on Christmas? It's a Monday."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"As long as we're open, I should be there," he nodded.

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"Good. Then you can watch the bar while I put together the greatest gift the world has ever known!" GOB said, cards suddenly appearing in his hands and his gaze turning dramatically towards the ceiling.

He practiced that all afternoon.

"I'm going to be Santa GOB, though, so you'll have to be my elf."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"An elf???"

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"Would you rather be Rudolph?" GOB asked sincerely. "I think the elf works better."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, okay, I can see that," Jarod nodded, accepting what appeared to be inevitable. "Should the girls be in costume?"

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"I have costumes in mind," GOB said. "I'll cover the cost of those, too."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

He nodded and made a note in the appointment book, using a code only he knew so Becky wouldn't read it and have her surprise ruined. "Need anything else?"

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"I could use help with a few things," GOB said. "I'll get you a list."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"I'll add it to the pile," he said, looking at the other ones he'd left on the desk.

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"Excellent!" GOB said. "I should be getting to the bar. God knows what Tino's up to by now."

"And Jarod? Thanks."

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"You're welcome. Good luck getting the rest of it together."

That evening

[l1ttle-billy.livejournal.com]

billy, leading a pair of disembodied legs by the belt comes in. "This probably isn't what you think it is." he said.

Re: That evening

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

Jarod stared. "Okay..."

Re: That evening

[l1ttle-billy.livejournal.com]

"There was an accident with a teleporter, and pieces of people got spread out around the island. Got any unclaimed body parts?"

Re: That evening

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"Not that I know of, but you can check upstairs if you want."

Re: That evening

[l1ttle-billy.livejournal.com]

"Thanks, uh," he looked at the legs. "Uhm, could you, I don't know, make sure these don't go running off? I'm not sure how they'd handle the stairs."

Re: That evening

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"Fifty dollars." Seemed like a standard price for watching disembodied legs.

Re: That evening

[l1ttle-billy.livejournal.com]

Billy wondered if Venture would compensate for that. "Can I get a receipt?"

Re: That evening

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"Sure!" Jarod wrote out a receipt and passed it over.

Re: That evening

[l1ttle-billy.livejournal.com]

Billy put the receipt in his pocket and paid Jarod. As he went, he looked back. "You've been here a while, how's this rate on the fandom weirdness scale?"

Re: That evening

[jarodpretends.livejournal.com]

"It's up there," Jarod admitted.

Re: That evening

[l1ttle-billy.livejournal.com]

"thought it might be." Billy went and possibly got a lot of weird looks when he explained what he was doing there.