Venture Industries: Fandom Branch. 1/4 [Morning-Late Afternoon]

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

Dr. Venture was sitting at his desk, working on the plans for the shrink ray he was developing.

He'd need to build it and test it soon. Hopefully the word about his last trial wouldn't scare people off.

[ooc: Open for all your science needs]

Comments

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Wade wandered into the building, hoping to find a bathroom. He really really had to go.

"Hello? Anyone home? Lucy?"

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"Lucy owns the nightclub," Dr. Venture said, looking up. "Oh great, you're a superhero, aren't you?" He frowned a little.

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

(Aww, he's like a balding Weasel.)

"I prefer the term dashing masked man who kills for money, but I guess I could live with that one."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

Dr. Venture brightened up. "Ever been a bodyguard?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"It's on my resume, yes." Wade was doing the 'I have to go to the bathroom dance' now. "Um, you got bathroom here? Or maybe just a potted plant that you don't really care about anymore?"

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

Dr. Venture pointed to the back room. "Just don't pee on my robot," he said. "After you're done we can talk business."

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Gotcha, no robot peeing." Wade fled for the bathroom.

...15 minutes later....

The toilet finally flushed and out stepped a much more relaxed mercenary. "So! Business! What did you want?"

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"I need a new bodyguard. My old one is too busy watching my kids back home," Dr. Venture said. "I'm willing to pay. Pay handsomely even."

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"How handsomely? Johnny Depp handsome or Justin Long, cute but nerdy handsome?"

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"Johnny Depp is a tramp," Dr. Venture said. "I'm speaking... mid four figures. A month."

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Do I get any bonuses?" Wade asked. "Like, you know, any deathrays you might build, or cookies?"

(Deathrays and cookies, hard choice for any self respecting anti-hero/villainous mercenary to make.)

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"Death rays? You seriously would be interested in that?" Dr. Venture said. "That can be arranged. The cookies, though... you're out of luck, sorry."

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Why wouldn't I be intersted in death-rays?" Wade asked, frowning. "That's what I do!"

"When I'm not, you know, teaching the evil little ones over at the school, that is."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"You're a teacher?" Dr. Venture said. "Wait, they hired Orpheus, they're probably hiring anyone who can put two sentences together. What's your name, anyways? Pajama boy?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Deadpool," Wade replied.

(Wait, why isn't my name in a crazy font to show that I'm a main character? This is weird.)

"And I think I'm gonna call you Old Weasel. Or Bald Weasel, which would you prefer?"

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"My name is Dr. Venture," he said. "You can call me Doc if you really want. But none of this weasel crap. I don't look like a weasel."

"...you think I look like a weasel?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Can do Doc Weasel."

Wade nodded in response to his question. "It's the face. Very Weasel-y if you ask me."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"Great," Dr. Venture said, rubbing his temple. "You got a name other than Deadpool, or am I seriously having to write that on your checks?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Wade pouted. "No cash?"

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"I run a legitimate business here, not some shady hooker emporium or something."

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

But wade loved shady hooker emporiums! They were the best type of emporiums!

"Make the checks out to Wade Wilson then," Wade said, sighing dramatically. "You know, if you changed the name of the business to Shady Hooker Emporium, you might get more customers."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"But I don't offer hookers," Dr. Venture said. "Unless someone wants to screw H.E.L.P.eR and anyone with a thing for robots I don't want stepping through that door."

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Wade gave H.E.L.P.er and appraising look.

(Nope, not that desperate.)

"Whatever, as long as I get paid," He said, shrugging. "So, what would I be doing exactly? Killing your enemies? Making you breakfast in bed? Singing you songs to go to sleep at night?"

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

Only Brock gets to tuck me in at night.

"Make sure anyone who tries to kill me fails. Easy, right?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"I think I can handle that." Wade looked around the shop for places where it would be easy to hide if you wanted to kill Doc Weasel.

"But I will be teaching classes, so I hope you don't think i'll be here all the time."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"I can deal with that," Dr. Venture said. "So, we going to shake on this, or is that violating some sort of samurai code?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Do I look like Wolverine?" Wade asked before shaking his head. "Just as long as I get paid, this works."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"No, you look like someone dipped a ninja in cherry syrup," Dr. Venture said. "You... didn't dip yourself in cherry syrup, did you?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Wade blinked. "Do you want me to dip myself in cherry syrup? Because I've had weird employers, but that might take the cake."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"Why would I want to dip you in cherry syrup?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Wade shrugged. "I don't know. You're the mad scientist."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"I'm not mad," Dr. Venture said. "I merely work outside the bounds of ethics and taste."

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Mad scientist," Wade said, nodding. "You have to pay me extra if you want corpses dug up, you know."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"I prefer them fresh," Dr. Venture said.

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Oh, well in that case, no charge." Wade was bouncing with the killing glee. "Just point me at who you want corpse-afied."

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"No one..." Dr. Venture said. "Yet. I think that might be bad PR right now."

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Gotcha, no killing people yet."

He was so going to kill someone doing this job.

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"You... want something else, or are we good for now?"

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Nope!"

He continued to stand there, looking around the shop.

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

Dr. Venture just sort of sat there, staring at Wade.

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Wade continued to stand there, amusing himself by playing I Spy.

(I spy something bald...)

It was a hard game to play alone.

(Doc Weasel!)

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

"You're sure there's nothing else?" Dr. Venture said.

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

"Absolutely."

(I spy something Weasel-y...)

[rustyboywonder.livejournal.com]

Dr. Venture sighed and went back to his plans.