fandomtownies | From Town to JGOB

Barry Gabrewski had spent the entire day yesterday hiding out. Not that he was scared or anything. Okay, maybe he was a little, but he'd convinced himself that he was surrounded by hundreds of the Rough Riders, the most notorious gang in all the West. He had to hide out. There was no chance of survival on his own.

But supplies were short here on the second day, and there wasn't much else he could do except face facts. He had to make a move and try to sneak out undetected, or he'd die of starvation. That was no way for a man to go. If he was going to die, he was going to die an honorable death.

Barry would've preferred it if he didn't die at all. That's why he was being careful and using his infiltration skills instead of going out guns blazing.

He even made it all the way to the school gate before he saw what was facing him below. The entire path to the food stash was littered with hidden men from the Rough Riders, their guns glinting in the fading light. Barry narrowed his eyes and adjusted his cowboy hat. His coat billowed in the breeze. He fingered his pistol in its holster as he planned to make his move.

Barry took a deep breath. "Doesn't look like we'll get through this one, Chuck."

Chuck Norris appeared beside Barry, decked out in black cowboy gear. He smiled at Barry and tipped his hat to him. "Barry, if you put your mind to it, you can do anything. I'm here with you," he added in a completely non-homoerotic sense.

"Are you sure, Chuck? If you want to go back, I'll understand."

"We're partners, Barry. Partners don't leave each other in a time of need. We'll get that food. We'll take out these men. Or we'll die trying. But I don't feel like dying today." And even if he did end up with a chest full of bullets, he wouldn't die, because when Chuck Norris doesn't feel like doing something, Chuck Norris doesn't do it, anatomy and mortality be damned.

"Me neither, Chuck." He pulled his pistol out of its holster and glanced at Chuck, who glanced back. "You ready for this?"

Chuck Norris flexed Chuck Norris' left fist, and then Chuck Norris' right fist. All three of them were ready. He nodded. "We're ready."

Barry looked back at the gauntlet they had to face. "High ho, silver," he murmured and broke into a run, Chuck Norris at his side.

Dodging and darting through the streets of Fandom wasn't easy under normal circumstances. Doing it when you were trying to be killed by your arch-nemesis' well-armed minions was even harder. Barry, Chuck and Chuck's fists fought hard. One by one, the enemy went down. Barry threw himself back against a wall to take cover from the shots being fired at him.

"We're pinned down!" he yelled.

"I'll cover you!" Chuck called back. Chuck Norris didn't yell.

"No, Chuck! I'm not leaving you!"

"I'll be right behind you!"

"No!" Barry insisted. "We're close! I'm not leaving you. We do this together!"

Chuck looked at Barry, thinking for a moment, then nodded. "We do this together," he repeated. They reloaded their weapons, somehow now each having one pistol per hand, nodded in slow motion and rose up from their cover. One shot fired after the other, peppering the air with the sound. Their enemies fell back, one by one, riddled with bullets.

"Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuun!" Chuck called, still stuck in slow motion, just the once. Chuck Norris didn't repeat himself.

Barry, wide-eyed, saw the opening and made a run for it, also still in slow-motion. Shots echoed all around him, narrowly missing him as he ran. "Chuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!"

Chuck looked up and nodded, pure grit and determination on his face. He followed, firing shot after well-aimed shot. "Gooooooooooo!" he yelled. "Iiiiii'mmm riiiiiiight behiiiiiind yoooooou!"

Barry reached the building and slammed into the door, tumbling in and executing an awkward roll. He spun around on the floor and watched as Chuck Norris dove in after him, allowing the door to swing closed behind them, blocking off their attackers.

Slow motion moment over, Chuck Norris stood up, put his pistols away and dusted himself off. He offered a hand to Barry. "Good work, Barry. I couldn't have made it without you."

Barry stood and smirked. "Thanks, Chuck. As always, it's been a pleasure." He tipped his hat to Chuck and went to say something else, but was interrupted.

"Um...can I help you?"

Barry spun around and suddenly he wasn't wearing cowboy gear anymore. His hat was gone. His guns were gone. All that was left was Barry the weakling in a white t-shirt and jeans. The fantasy was over. He gaped a little, trying to explain to the JGOB counter attendant what had just happened. He looked over his shoulder, but Chuck was gone. Barry smiled a little. He'd be back.

"Hello?" the attendant asked for the third time to get the kid's attention. It worked. Barry turned around.

"Uh, yeah. I'll have a raspberry danish."

"I'm afraid we're all out."

Barry's face fell. Heroes rarely got the reward they deserved. "I'll take a cupcake."

[OOC: All of the above before the JGOB guy talked to him? Fantasy. But feel free to have seen a geeky kid running through the streets of Fandom playing cowboy gun fight with his fingers as guns. Chuck Norris was all in his head. So was Chuck Norris' left fist and Chuck Norris' right fist. For all your JGOB needs.]

From Town to JGOB - Sunday Evening

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