fandomtownies | Fandom Post Office: Saturday [18.08]

Fandom Post Office: Saturday [18.08]

Moist looked up from his paperwork at the sound of hooves. There was a horse standing in the middle of the Post Office. "Can I help you?"

The horse bobbed its head up and down, then tapped its front hoof against the floor. "I heard you had some envelopes that needed stamping."

Perplexed, Moist shook his head. "No, no we don't."

The horse looked around, shifting awkwardly from hoof to hoof. "You didn't want to ask me about the length of my face?"

"Not really."

"I guess I'll just go then," it replied, and trotted out the door.

Moist watched it leave. "That was odd."

The Post Office is open and horse - and pun - free.

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He's not even slightly damp.

Sometime before lunch Gabriel entered the post office, carrying the letters he'd written so far. Posting them had him a little worried. Either they wouldn't reach their destination, which would be bad, or they would and what then? It wasn't like God had decided to communicate with him much lately.

His feelings well hidden he approached the desk. "You said you could deliver to Heaven."

"We deliver anywhere and everywhere," Moist replied promptly, not showing any trace of hesitation as he eyed the letters, even though he really had no idea. Dropping mail in the hopper and trusting to luck was pretty much how he worked. Given that, he gave Gabriel an especially confident smile. "Heaven is just another zone to us."

Giving Moist a suspicious look, Gabriel asked: "And how will I know you've delivered the letter?" he asked.

"Now that's up to the recipient." Moist smiled even wider, quite enjoying himself. Promising a service it would be impossible to prove he hadn't performed was the best kind of promise. "We only guarantee delivery, we make no guarantees that anyone will write back. And unfortunately delivery confirmation isn't available for mail sent to the celestial realms. The clergy don't approve of anyone proving definitively the gods exist."

Muttering something inaudible, Gabriel persisted: "So I can't get a confirmation? I'm not wanting proof of God's existence, I know him. He's a personal friend of mine. We go a long way back."

Moist's brain chose that moment to remind him that this was a crazy person. He'd forgotten. "Post Office regulations," he said, holding out his hands in the universal gesture of what can you do?. "My hands are completely tied. But I'm sure they'll get there safely. Just have a little faith."

"Faith?" Gabriel gave him a look that clearly showed he thought Moist was insane. "And you expect me to pay for this?"

"That's generally part of the transaction. Tell you what I'll do. Just for you, special rate on delivery to Heaven, Cori Celesti, and Valhalla." He had no idea how much that should be anyway, but it didn't matter. he could fake it. He sized up the letters and named a price, which wasn't much more that it would cost to send them across the country. "First class, of course."

Gabriel didn't like spending money, but it wasn't that expensive and if the letters actually got delivered it would definitely be worth it. If not he'd been made a fool of. He thought for a moment. "Deal."

Moist grinned and held out his hand for the letters. "You've made a wise decision."

Giving Moist a suspicious look, Gabriel handed him the letters. "If I find out they got lost you're going to regret not having delivered them personally," he replied.

Nor is any combination of people glad.

They may be mail boxes, but they don't have a gender. Honest.

Fandom Post Office - now one hundred percent pun free.

*giggles at the pun*

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Fandom Post Office: Saturday [18.08]

Talk to Moist

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Mod Gladys

Mail boxes.

OOC

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