fandomtownies | The Arms Hotel Lobby, Monday [11/19]

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The Arms Hotel Lobby, Monday [11/19]

"Gunther? What the heck is that?" asked Mary, staring at the platter Gunther was carrying out from the kitchen.

"Turducken!" said Gunther enthusiastically. "I vatch Food Network last night. You take the chicken and stuff it in the duck, then stuff the duck inside the turkey with stuffing and sausage and roast it all together." The sous chef came running out of the kitchen with a carving knife, and Gunther started carving up his masterpiece.

Mary continued to gawk. "I think I'm sticking with safe and simple chicken noodle soup."

Welcome to the Arms Hotel!
Today's Specials
Turducken
Chicken Noodle Soup
Potato Gratin

[OOC: It's the Union Reunion! Arms employees, please be sure to drop by and freak Mary out.]

[ETA: Welcome new teachers! Temporary lodging is available at the Arms. I should be around on and off all day or you can find me on AIM as evilthena if you have any questions.]

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Relax in the lobby, enjoy the specials, watch Gunther's energetic portrayal of how a turducken is born, complete with hand gestures, or flag down the sous chef and order whatever you want.

Who is turning green at the sight of turducken.

I should not be awake watching the Food Network at this hour.

A Jeff who looked older mostly by the grace of being slightly taller (and slightly more tanned) wandered into the hotel, gawking. Just a little.

"This entire island is like a cockroach!"

"Hi there. Welcome to the Arms Hotel. Is there something I can help you with?" asked Mary, looking at the strange man saying strange things. She didn't recognize Jeff at all.

"Breasts!" Jeff froze up. "I mean, breasts! I mean, h-- breasts! I mean, hello breasts, your Mary is very well preserved!"

There was only one person who it could be. "Jeff, is that you?" asked Mary, astonished.

He made warding-off movements at her general chest area and turned around a little.

It was kind of hard to speak to the woman whose bosom had been a very important part of his teenage years, after all.

"Mary!" Jeff exclaimed, his voice full of nervous happy. "It's good to see you!"

He wasn't looking at her.

Mary just stared. He'd only been gone a week! Then she remembered how weird last night's radio was. "So, I guess you're here for the reunion?" she asked.

"Yes," Jeff managed, "I've been on an island!"

He wasn't sure how both statements were connected.

"An island?" asked Mary.

"Lesbos," he said, turning around fully. It was the only way he could keep up a decent conversation.

Especially after that thing seven years ago where he tried to escape from unconditional sex by making up a dead girlfriend named Mary. "Which isn't what it sounds like, I was really disappointed."

"Yeah, that must have been misleading," said Mary, struggling to keep a straight face.

"I got desperate a little further into it," Jeff explained, sticking his hands in his pockets and staring quite intently at the door. "If it wasn't for that chicken, I might've had breasts."

"I don't want to know," said Mary, shuddering.

"Lesbos is really underbreasted," Jeff continued, as he wasn't capable of seeing the shudder. "For an island of the name. Someone should do something about that."

"It must have some nice beaches, being an island," said Mary, hoping that the beach image would get other images out of her head.

"Oh, no," Jeff declared, "I don't go near the beaches. There's far too great a danger of eroding parts."

"Eroding... pants?" asked Mary. "How exactly would that happen?"

River entered the lobby, stopping just inside the entrance. It was too familiar, after all these years. She wondered if Gunther was still making the specials. She might even consider trying one.

"Well, you know how you sit down on a beach, and you just sort of... shift..."

He may have more than the regular amount of experience in these matters.

"Welcome to the Arms Hotel! Can I help you?" asked Mary as she greeted the very familiar-looking stranger.

"No... I don't know how things 'shift,'" said Mary, very confused.

"Mary," River said, a tiny smile appearing. "Don't remember me?"

"You know, your... bits... sort of start moving along with the sand. It may cause some, er, trauma."

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The Arms Hotel Lobby, Monday [11/19]

Turducken! [11/19]

Talk to Mary [11/19]

OOC [11/19]

Re: Talk to Mary [11/19]

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