Arms Hotel Lobby, Wednesday

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

Around noon, Jeff rolled out of a nearby cupboard, hit his head on the desk, and blinked.

Oh, wait. "I'd fallen asleep," he realised.

Nana eyed him. Jeff just shrugged, got up, and got to work.

[ open and I am failboat ]

Comments

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

It might have been a good thing that Jeff had fallen out of the cupboard in time for Turtle arrive with lunch, or, really, it wasn't like the cupboard wouldn't have been the first place she'd have checked for him.

"Jeeee~eeff!"

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

"Turtle!" Jeff cried, cheerfully. He held on to the bump on the back of his head, which had started to smart a few moments after his easy realisation that he'd just fallen asleep. "I overslept!"

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

"Was it at least a good sleep?" asked Turtle, who was already pulling up a chair so that she could go and sit beside Jeff on his side of the desk before delving into the usual sandwiches.

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

Jeff thought about it. "It was really refreshing," he said, finally, "But a bit moist."

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

"Moi--" Turtle started to ask, wondered if it was one of those things she shouldn't ask, stopped, and then looked, almost hopefully toward the dog.

"Nana?" she wondered, hoping to God that was it.

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

"No," Jeff said, shaking his head, "Cats."

He shot a look at the cupboard. "I think. It was a bit dark in there, I might've misfelt."

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

There was a good, long pause.

"Cats?"

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

"I think one of them got sick on me," Jeff said, mournfully.

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

"That isn't the question," said Turtle, "so much as why there are cats in there to begin with."

Her eyes widened a little.

"Gunther?" she assumed, deciding never to eat at the Arms ever again.

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

"Sometimes, he just gets in these moods," Jeff said, peering towards the kitchen to check that he wasn't in one right now. "I wouldn't put it past him, he brought snails one time."

Pause.

"For cooking," he clarified. "Not that I'm saying he'd cook cats."

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

Turtle got a look on her face, the kind that made it pretty clear that she would say that he'd cook cats if it weren't for the fact that she wanted to avoid all possible accusations of libel and defamation.

So she switched to snails.

"Snails as in escargot?"

She also figured talking about snails would be a good time to pull the sandwiches out.

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

"They mostly just looked like dead snails," Jeff said with a shrug. He wasn't much of a food connoisseur, unless you counted that he sort of liked curry. "I'm not sure if he named any of them."

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

"They're supposed to be all fancy," said Turtle, her eyes rolling a little with contempt. "Which mean, yeah, super gross and not even filling. Plus, they are practically dead snails, like you said. Why does fancy food have to always be so gross? I mean, look at this sandwich. It's good, it's cheap, it's filling, it has lot of good things for you in it...and it's not dead snails."

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

Jeff nodded in agreement as he snagged one. Happily. This was Jeff's glee face. "Maybe it's fancy because it's gross," he said, thoughtfully, "Maybe it's only for people who had their tongue retooled, 'cos that sounds like it'd cost a lot."

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

"That's the stupidest use of money I ever heard," said Turtle. Around a mouthful of delicious sandwich. Some mustard got on the corner of her lip, but she just wiped it away with her pinkie.

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

"It could be a trend?"

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

"Stupid trend," Turtle said, "but enough people seem to be on board. I wonder how much escargot gets eaten on average? Maybe there are enough stupid rich people that I should start investing."

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

"You could start a restaurant," Jeff proposed, "And just have them sell the surgery in the back and the snails in the front. You can get eggs, too. Round fish ones."

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

"...Caviar?" asked Turtle, after needed a moment of chewing and remembering. "But that's a little seedy, operations in the back, isn't it? Besides, you don't want people knowing that you're directly associating like that. They get suspicious and uppity if they know you're doing two things at once to take money from them. So they need to be seperate, but close, and connected only in ways that people smart enough to look into it would know. So, a fancy-pants restaurant, and, just down the road, a trend-setting taste-bud reallighnment clinic."

There was a pause.

"People like the word clinic better than, like, shop or hospital in this case."

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

There was another pause, this time while Jeff chewed (physically) and chewed (mentally).

He thought about it some more.

"You could have them hand out flyers outside the restaurant," he said, finally, "but put them in some weird tongue-suit so people don't know they're associated."

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

"Jeff," stated Turtle, "people who eat dead snails and fish eggs don't take flyers from people in tongue-suits."