The Docks, Saturday

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

Jack emerged from the Homer's cabin a little groggily, flopped into his chair, and stared up at the sky. Apparently, he'd spent an entire WEEK as a LITTLE TEAPOT. Oh, he bet THAT had played well on the radio. Later, when he found out it hadn't even been mentioned because his mun's retconning like a mad fiend, he'd be disappointed. For right now, though, he needed a beer.

He'd missed his birthday, even. Another year down the drain, another year closer to retirement, another year getting more old. Except not -- all the time travel and stuff meant he was actually older than that. He'd have to ask Carter to count it all up, sometime, once he'd gone home. Damn, and he hadn't gotten the kid anything, either.

AND he'd missed his "job" at the "goddess"'s "store". He'd have to explain to her.

He sipped his beer and watched the horizon. Yup. He'd worry about everything later.

After a while, he got up just long enough to set out his sign on the pier.

Captain Jack's Wild Ride
Great rates to float my boat

Comments

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

Yuh, huh. "...aaaaaaand?" If there was a mini-Teal'c running around, or a mini-Daniel, Jack wanted to know.

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

She fidgeted. Unfortunately, neither being cloned by the Asgard nor dating Jack Harkness had made her a better liar. "And what?"

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

Jack gave her a sharp look. "Who's the other clone, Colonel?"

Now his guesses were turning towards Ba'al, or Maybourne, or someone like that. "You're hiding something."

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

It was an ingrained instinct to answer when he snapped at her like that. "Charlie Kawalsky."

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

That? Had NOT been anywhere near anything he'd expected. "...Kawalsky," Jack repeated, trying to process that. "Damn... It's been ten years..."

"Is he... happy, wherever he ended up?" he asked. "No snake in his head?"

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

"He's very happy, last I heard. Working his way into a relationship with a bossy redhead. No snake." Sam grinned. "If the timelines play out right, he's got a busy future ahead of him."

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

Jack nodded soberly. "That's good to hear. I... Yeah. How about yourself? You doing all right?"

A thought struck him. "Oh, wow, there are TWO of you in your universe. You have no idea how HANDY that would be. I mean, Lee just isn't the same."

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

"I'm doing fine. Still trying to find my way, but that's mostly because the SGC isn't getting the funding it needs to mount an expedition to the Atlantis galaxy properly, so I'm filling in whenever the other Carter's stuck offworld or she's home with the kids or something."

"There's nothing wrong with Dr. Lee," Sam argued, trying to be loyal. "He's one of the best minds at the mountain."

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

"He's THE best mind at the mountain, after you," Jack agreed, "but he's not YOU. Hell, he's not even Rodney. I mean I'd take him over Rodney any day of the week, unless the fate of the universe was at stake, and..."

He paused, and stared. "Did you say KIDS?"

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

Sam couldn't help flashing him a grin. "Two. Both under the age of ten and smart as hell. And McKay's not so bad. Sometimes."

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

"Please, please tell me you're not from one of the alternate realities where you married the bastard," Jack sighed.

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

"Which bastard are you talking about? I think you need to be more specific."

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

"McKay!" Jack insisted. "How many alternate-reality bastards have you married?!?" He was pretty sure it was just Rodney, and... him. Which was awkward.

"Is it Pete?" he asked. "I kind of liked Pete."

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

"There's an alternate universe where I married Rodney McKay?"

Seriously? How was this her life?

"And, um, no. Not Pete, either. Some guy she met at work. General something."

Yes, she was just yanking his chain now, but she figured she was entitled. Rodney? What the hell?

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

Great. How was it that he only got Carter in alternate realities??? That was just so not fair.

"To be fair, you divorced him soon after. And then... died in a lab explosion. You know what, forget about that -- let's talk about this general of yours. Hers. I always knew you had a secret thing for Georrr--Landry." It was still too soon to make light of Hammond -- damn heart attack.

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

Lab explosion??? Served her right for marrying McKay in the first place.

Sam shook her head. "I don't have a general. She has a general. And two kids who probably already have spots guaranteed for an first-contact team as soon as they're old enough." She grinned. "Well, if she was going to go after anyone who wasn't, er, him, it would have been Teal'c, then General Hammond. He's got charisma."

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

"Hmm." Jack nodded. "So, while she's doing some highly inappropriate fraternizing with a superior officer, what about you? Got yourself some boytoy less than half your age, like Mini-Me did?"

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

Sam blushed, because, well, technically that was the situation. "Hey, she married the guy. It's not that inappropriate."

Except for that time in the mess, but she so wasn't going back to that image. Having it burned into her retinas once was enough.

"He's in his twenties now, but we were friends in school together, yes. In my defense, we didn't get together romantically until a couple of months ago, after he'd been back to his own universe for a few years, then come back and was living with me."

"What about you? Seeing anybody?"

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

"Hey, I didn't say there was anything WRONG with it," Jack told her. "That's between you and him. Do I get a name, at least? Mini-Me's girl is named Claire."

He shrugged. "I, uh... You know me -- not much to tell. There was a fling with a hot lawyer a few months back, but that's been over a while. There's this one woman I've sort of got my eye on, but I'm here in this alternate universe, and she's off commanding a spaceship..."

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

"His name's Cameron Mitchell," Sam said, hoping she hadn't just doomed some poor guy in an alternate universe to latrine duty for all time. "He's a pilot, usually on the F-302, but possibly due to be assigned to the Prometheus."

"Off commanding a spaceship? How'd that happen?"

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

"MITCHELL???" Jack sputtered. "You're dating MITCHELL??? What are you with HIM for???" After a few seconds of blinking, he added, "...And why the hell is he still a pilot instead of on SG-1?" The damn kid was just replacing him all OVER the place.

Oh, right, there was that other avenue of conversation -- the safer one. "Uh, anyway, the woman... The IOA wouldn't let her stay in charge of the Atlantis expedition, so I had to find her SOMETHING comparable, right?"

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

"I'm with him because I love him, you ass. He's a good person and has been through a lot and he makes me happy. Also? HE DIDN'T BREAK UP WITH MY DAMN ANSWERING MACHINE when he ran off for greener pastures after taking my virginity, all right?"

Yes, she'd been waiting a while to get that out. Sam got to her feet, dropping the fishing pole to the dock.

"He ends up on SG-1???"

How the hell did that happen?

"Yeah, I guess that's fair. Except, what's the IOA? Since when do they have a say in staffing of expeditions?"

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

"...Okay, WHAT???" Seriously, what??? "I'm sorry your first boyfriend was an ass, but... WHAT???"

He sighed. "Mitchell got his pick of jobs at the SGC for being a hero over Antarctica. And the IOA is what happens when you tell the UN about the Stargate program. Man, the British ambassador was pissed."

[carter-i-am.livejournal.com]

She rolled her eyes and sat back down. He was so clueless sometimes.

"The other mini-you, the one who was here first? He was my first boyfriend, and he just took off. I know it isn't you, and I'm sorry I brought it up, but you asked. I had to do some serious reevaluating after that."

Rebuilding her pride and getting over Jack had taken some time. Plus there'd been the whole not wanting to date a teenager because she felt like a statutory rapist thing.

"He was a--" Sam suddenly had a feeling that she might not want to know this piece of information. Being a hero around the SGC wasn't a safe thing. "Anyway. Why wouldn't the IOA let your sort-of woman be in charge?"

[nofishinmypond.livejournal.com]

Jack stared. "Was he HIT IN THE HEAD or something??? For the love of PETE..."

He sighed. "Yeeeeah. Okay. So... I'm still sorry about that. He wasn't me, but he sort of was, and that's just... Ouch."

"...Now I'm feeling guilty for not going back to visit Laira." Maybe all this talk of relationships wasn't so good for small talk, after all.

"The IOA's in charge, because of mutilateralism and cooperation between nations, and... Basically, the Stargate Program pissed off a whole lot of people. Especially since the Russians knew and no one else did. So now the IOA get to throw their weight around and be assholes, but the Air Force is still in charge of military operations. And we get some funding from the UN now, which means we don't have to worry as much about asshole Senators."