Fixer-Uppers [morning through lunch]

[momslilassassin]

Ben had one more exam to go--in Master Holmes' class. That was why, instead of fiddling around with machine parts, Ben's head was buried in his class notes instead.

Fixer-Uppers is open. And distracted.

Comments

[glacial_queen]

Good luck with that studying Ben. There was a Karla wandering in to see you. Which meant studying time was at a premium. "Kiss kiss," she said, poking her head in the door. "Whatcha doing?"

[momslilassassin]

"Studying for my last exam," Ben said with a little smile. "Hi!"

[glacial_queen]

"I've got my last exam with Loki in a bit, but there's no real studying for it," Karla said. "In fact, I'm pretty sure studying for my badass exam means I automatically fail the class. And I took my economics exam yesterday."

Since it was that or fret about her performance all day long.

"What's your last class?"

[momslilassassin]

"Master Holmes'," Ben said. "It's after lunch."

[glacial_queen]

She made a face at that. Her feelings for Sherlock were...complicated. "You and Ender are both in that class, right? How do you think he'll do?"

Karla had been grateful most of her finals had been easy and hadn't required much thought.

[momslilassassin]

Ben gave a little shrug. "He'll be fine, like always," he said. "And if he wasn't, he wouldn't ask me for help anyway."

Well, that was a little bitter.

[glacial_queen]

Karla was just going to blink a few times at that. "I'm pretty sure we left the academic discussion behind," she said carefully. "Want to tell me what's up?"

Awww, look. She made it sound like there was a possibility she'd accept a no.

[momslilassassin]

"He's being weird," Ben complained.

[glacial_queen]

"Weird how?" Karla asked, leaning against the counter to get comfortable. This sounded like it could take awhile. "What happened?"

[momslilassassin]

"He shut himself off," Ben said with a frown, "like it's some kind of giant character flaw--his or mine, I still haven't figured it out--that he fell asleep on me."

[glacial_queen]

"He fell asleep on you?" Karla asked, eyes wide for a moment. "I didn't know that."

She was willing to bet she had an idea why that might have Ender withdrawing, yes.

"Oh."

[momslilassassin]

"Oh what?" Ben asked suspiciously.

[glacial_queen]

"Oh that's interesting," Karla said quickly, trying to figure out a way to word this that would neither upset Ender nor alienate Ben. "When was this? Right when he got back?"

[momslilassassin]

Ben nodded, still looking a little irritated. "He was exhausted."

[glacial_queen]

"And vulnerable," Karla pointed out quietly. Don't you be irritable at her, Ben Skywalker. "Ben, when was Ender ever allowed to show vulnerability without it being used against him, used to push him down a path he wasn't sure if he wanted to follow? The fact that he showed you that much vulnerability and fell asleep on you? That's a lot of trust right there. More than I think he's comfortable showing, because it puts a lot of power in your hands."

[momslilassassin]

He scrubbed his hands through his hair. "So how do I fix this?" he asked quietly. "I swear if I get within a few feet of him he startles like a teal deer. I'm not storing up power to leverage against him. I just want him to trust me."

[glacial_queen]

"Darkness, Ben! You're probably the person he trusts most, outside of Valentine!" Karla said, hands in the air. "He trusts you enough to have been vulnerable in front of you in the first place! Don't start sulking because he can't be comfortable with having shown that much vulnerability later. But you'll notice, you didn't see him falling asleep one me that day."

Which Karla was JUST FINE WITH, thanks much.

"As for fixing it, the answer is by not pushing him right now," she continued, drumming her fingers on the counter. "You have a year's worth of friendship with Ender on me, there's no way you couldn't have noticed how he works. Every few steps forward ends with him withdrawing a bit while he settles in and gets used to everything again. Pushing him while he's like that only makes him withdraw further."

[momslilassassin]

Ben nodded, looking thoughtful. "Can you check on him for me?" he asked. "Until he decides he's all right with me fussing again."

[glacial_queen]

"Of course," Karla said. "I was going to do that anyway."

Monday. She'd go visit on Monday just to be sure. Without fussing or hovering--well, as best she could.

Hmmm. Should she--? Ender would probably prefer she leave it alone, but Ben was so damn hopeless sometimes. "There's another thing you might not have thought of," she said.

[momslilassassin]

"What's that?" he asked, looking a little lost.

[glacial_queen]

"You remember the conversation we had, right after than annoying week in November?" she asked.

[momslilassassin]

Ben nodded, blushing slightly. "Yes."

He wasn't sure things had even gotten quite back to normal.

[glacial_queen]

"Did you ever think this could be a factor in his drawing away a bit?" she asked. "Too much, coming on top of all that? Withdrawing might also be his way of trying to center himself a bit."

[momslilassassin]

"I'd been trying really hard not to seem like anything was different," Ben flailed.

[glacial_queen]

Karla had yet to see Ben's acting skills, so he'd forgive her for being just a little dubious here.

"That doesn't mean it didn't affect him, too," she reminded. "Even if you've managed to convince him that you're just fine, it doesn't mean he's found his equilibrium with it."