Fixer-Uppers [all day]

[momslilassassin]

Ben had completely rebuilt his datapad and it had been working perfectly right up until the moment he fired it up at Fixer-Uppers.

You'd find Ben cursing under his breath and trying to delete his way out of several hundred pop up ads offering assistance for various sexual ailments he didn't have.

"At least they could learn to spell," he grumbled under his breath.

Fixer-Uppers was open, and wondering if maybe Ben should have taken Holmes and Watson's course after all...

Comments

[endsthegame]

"This is the second week in a row I find you cursing at your datapad," Ender announced, as he stepped into the building. "I'm starting to get concerned, Ben."

[momslilassassin]

"Me too," Ben said, frowning hard. "It works fine until I come in here. You get fruit. I get sex ads. I want the fruit."

[endsthegame]

"William was getting assaulted by pop-up ads himself the other day," Ender said, setting lunch down on the counter. "Maybe we really do have a virus."

At least he wasn't the type to ask 'what kind of sex ads'?

[momslilassassin]

"One that's limited to the store?" Ben looked thoughtful. "Huh."

[endsthegame]

"I can't be sure," he noted, "William and you are the only people reporting any trouble. I haven't had any myself."

But he was starting to get a very strange feeling about the non-answers Jane had been giving him about it. That would be ridiculous, though. She was just a program.

[momslilassassin]

"Maybe you started it," Ben said, shooting him a little grin.

[endsthegame]

"Yes," Ender said, dryly. "It's all part of my secret plan to force you to mass-order marital aids."

[momslilassassin]

Ben burst out laughing. "If you're tired of mouse droids, you just had to say so," he said, feigning grief.

[endsthegame]

Ender stared at him helplessly for a moment. That was ridiculous.

Then he laughed.

"Don't get any ideas."

[momslilassassin]

"There could be some truly disturbing hybrids," Ben mused, not helping matters at all.

[endsthegame]

"I really don't want to know about your fantasy life," Ender lied laughed said.

[momslilassassin]

Ben wrinkled his nose at him. "Well see if I give you one, then."

[endsthegame]

"I would be immensely grateful if you didn't," Ender said, glancing over. "The nets in this day and age really need clean-up."

They were nice and mormon clean in Ender's time. Mostly. A little more, anyway.

[momslilassassin]

Ben smiled at him. "Have you ever visited Karla at her job? I think I have the ceiling just about memorized. It's the only safe place to look."

[endsthegame]

"I've visited her several times, and never had a problem," Ender retorted. "I just don't see the point in letting it bother me."

Of course, he also had a notebook full of scribbles about pacifist philosophies that dictated chastity in his bag, courtesy of pacifism class, so maybe he wasn't the best person to question about it.

[momslilassassin]

"Of course you don't," Ben said with a rueful laugh. "Did she share with you about a particular night?"

Or maybe overshare?

[endsthegame]

There was a really short pause.

"Are we going to talk about that?" he asked. "Because even I have my limits."

[momslilassassin]

"Not in detail!" Ben babbled, blushing furiously. "I was just checking to see if I was the only one who heard."

He didn't talk about his personal life like that with Ender, let alone someone else's.

[endsthegame]

Yes. Well. Of course, talking about Ben's personal life held all kinds of other awkward connotations.

"She told me," he affirmed. He wasn't blushing. Learn from Ender, Ben. "At least she solved the issue without any damage."

Talking about it in strategic terms was so much better.

[momslilassassin]

Ben was trying not to blush, but sadly his skin was failing him. "With three people," he said, trying to sound casual, and not coming even a little bit close.

His datapad screen helpfully began popping up with "How to talk about sex with your kids!" ads, which he didn't notice.

[endsthegame]

Ender sighed. "Have a drink, if you can't talk about it," he suggested, "I don't actually want you to explode."

[momslilassassin]

"I'm a big fan of not exploding," Ben mumbled, taking refuge in his coffee.

[endsthegame]

"The important thing is that she just removed a potential danger to herself," Ender said, reasonably.

Being reasonable in the face of things like this was his real superpower.

[momslilassassin]

"True," Ben babbled replied. "Hobart will hate this, which I'm inclined to be in favor of."

[endsthegame]

"I think most of us would be in favour of it," Ender replied. "More coffee. You still look a little red."