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Fast Eddie' | Evening | Friday | March 25

It was Friday night which meant the start of the weekend and Nathan found himself at the bowling alley. Yeah, shut the fuck up, it wasn't like he could afford to do much else. There was actually money in his pocket from both working and his mum but blowing it all in one night wasn't going to happen this time. He'd done that before and suffered in the days after, surviving off ketchup packets and water from dirty water fountains. It hadn't been fun.

The bowling alley in town was both cheap and entertaining. He could order a huge plate of nachos (with everything on them, of course), a drink and bowl as many games as he wanted all for the cost of going out to some club to pay for some chick high on acid to rub against the front of his pants. Besides, having some nameless chick rub against him at this point in time would be a detriment to his health.

Namely, he'd probably get his ass killed.

Whatever, he wasn't thinking about getting killed. Currently, he was chatting it up with some cute girl in the lane over, challenging her to bowl a strike. If she did, he'd do a headfirst slide down the lane and into the pins, risking both a concussion and severe injuries to his naughty bits. She took the challenge and, fortunately for him, left a split standing. Oops, better luck next time! She bet him another plate of nachos that he couldn't hit five pins with his eyes closed.

This time, Nathan won and sent her off to get more nachos immediately. Hey, he was skinny and he could put the food away. No need to wait when he was hungry and content! More nachos for him!

[Open place in town thus open post]

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Look, George was bored, Caritas wasn't anywhere near as good as the Dancing Dove, and there was only so much lurking about a body could do before it was just creepy. So he found his way to the bowling alley.

"Ye be any good?" he asked the kid he vaguely recognized from school. It being a small school an' all.

"Depends on what we're talking about, mate," Nathan said, glancing back over his shoulder at the owner of the voice. "I am good at a veritable cornucopia of things. You'll have to narrow it down."

"An' now 'm curious about things way more interestin' than rolling a ball down th'lane," George decided. "Though tha'd be what I was asking after."

Oh George, that was a dangerous thing to tell someone who had absolutely no fucking filter. That meant he was gonna put the bowling ball back on the rack and make his way up towards the other boy.

"First, I am an excellent fucking bowler." He really wasn't but he thought he was. "Do you see my lack of competition here, mate? That's because everyone is too chickenshit to challenge me. They're afraid. Tremblings in their knickers and just too shy to take them right off."

He was a bullshitter George, could you tell?

"And as for things being more interesting than bowling?" Nathan shrugged because there were fucking tons. "Ever ridden a mechanical bull? I haven't but I've seen it in movies and what would be more fun than having all that fucking power between your legs, right?"

...you know, ever since Mat had left, George had really missed natural bullshitters. For one, they were all kinds of entertaining.

"I was jus' figuring that th'lack o'competition meant everyone had run off t'play a real game," he shot back, definitely amused. "Or mayhap ye jus' like th'solitary rolls of th'ball."

He had to consider the question though. "Power ye can do somethin' wit'? Or mayhap somethin' between yer legs that won' be bucking ye off?"

Nathan was perfectly fine with being labeled as entertaining. It was better than being labeled a fucking dickhead but he was used to that by now. Didn't even phase him.

"Balls should never be solitary," he said and smirked smugly. George was just lucky he didn't go into an more in depth explanation of that particular statement.

Nathan reached for a handful of his nachos, going through the motions of chewing and swallowing before answering the next question. "You in the habit of putting something between your legs that bucks you off? You might wanna do some lunges for that, mate. Might build up the muscles in your thighs. How embarrassing would that be, you on top some of girl and she just throws you right off. Hilarity, man."

"I did know a man called One Ball at home," he mused. "They do say a gilly did cut t'other off cause he'd been walkin' out wit'another lass."

George snorted at Nathan's ramblings. "Me, I'd be thinkin' tis yer back an' arms that would need th'strength. I wouldn' know. Never had a complaint, but yer th'one goin' on about bein' obsessed wit' a bucking bull."

"I was providing you with a mere sampling of something more exciting than bowling," Nathan replied, shrugging. "And I believe in being thorough and detailed in case the person I'm speaking with is a little slow."

And after Nathan said that, he just smirked over at George and shrugged.

" Get it, mate?"

"'M sorry," George deadpanned. "Could ye repeat that?"

"Funny," Nathan said, picking up on that one fairly easily. "Though, I am going to tell people that you're slow now. You brought it on yourself, really. Being slow doesn't mean you're any less special. It just means your slow...and probably a little sloppy."

Stepping back, Nathan sized up the other boy for a minute. "And a little stubby looking too. You're like a pencil with a half worn down eraser. I think that's a good way to describe you."

"Slow, sloppy, an' stubby?" he asked. "Did they have a sale on them ess words or are ye jus' partial t'sounding like an idiot?"

"Oooh, don't verbally abuse me too harshly," he quipped, smirking. "I might run to the bathroom and gave a good cry. Besides, I'm just being honest. Isn't that what most people like? A little honesty mixed in with all the lies they surely hear on a daily basis?"

"Don' worry," George smirked back. "I won' be tellin' th'lasses if ye need to shed a few tears. Though mayhap if yer a fan o' honesty, I should let 'em know about yer sensitive nature?"

"Some girls love them a sensitive bloke, mate," Nathan said, shrugging. "You say a few sweet words, stroke their hair, comfort them in their time of need and they'll be reaching for the buckle of your belt before you even realize it. It's a nice way of saying 'thank you, Nathan, for letting me snot up your shoulder.'"

Wow, Nathan hoped super hearing wouldn't pick up on this because he was really letting his true dickhead nature out for a bit tonight.

"Aye an' as long as they don' catch yer plan an' draw a knife on ye, y'll be enjoying th'fruits of yer plots," he commented

"So little faith in my abilities," he said, mock gasping and clutching his shirt. "This is valuable information I'm giving you here, mate. Why would a girl pull a knife on a bloke whose just giving her what he wants? It's the kind, gentlemanly thing to do, isn't it?"

"I've got no reason t'have faith in ye," George pointed out, laughing at Nathan's act. "D'ye always have faith in random strangers ye run across? An, aye, most lasses I know would be pullin' a knife on a lad who be jus' humouring them t'get in their skirts."

"Maybe faith isn't the right word," he said after a moment. "I do always try and go into every new encounter with a new person with a positive outlook."

Again, that was a load of bull but he was a judging person so he went into encounters with some impression already made most of the time. It just wasn't always good.

"Who knows what will come of it, yeah? At the worst, we meet, there's no connection and we go our separate ways, more knowledgeable for the experience. At the best, new email buddy, right? And with an attitude like that, no one has pulled a knife on me. You must be unlucky, kid."

He snorted. "Oh, aye, yer a right Li'l Mary Sunshine. 'M surprised th' little birdies don' fly out yer arse and elp ye do yer hair."

"But could be th'lasses I know are jus' a bit more violent," he admitted. Between the Lower City and Kyle's insane world...it probably wasn't a huge stretch to say that.

Oh, if only George knew who he'd been sleeping with for the past few weeks. He hadn't exactly seen Caroline's violent side but he knew it was there. Vampire and all.

"One, even though I don't do guys, I always appreciate any positive attention aimed at my ass so thanks for the lookout," he said, twisting up George's words a bit because he could. "Two, my hair's beautiful as is. No help needed."

[I need to go craaaaaaaaaash. SP is good though!]

If George knew, he would laugh his ass off at Nathan. And then feel badly for it in another year or two when he fell for a scarily dangerous girl of his own.

"...I didn't know twas possible t'claim ye only like th'lasses, an' then boast of yer beautiful hair in th'next breath."

"You've obviously been hanging around some fucking boring people, man," Nathan said, giving his curls a shake as if on cue. "It's good to have confidence. Besides, there is nothing wrong with a bloke being beautiful. It's equality, man. If a girl can be a fucking badass who can rip your balls off in the same breath as giving some other bloke a hard on, why can't a guy be beautiful?"

"Or I've been spending time wit' people wit' better things t'do than worry about their beauty," George replied. "Some things do be more interestin' though I can' tell if y'd get that."

"I don't worry about my beauty," Nathan said, shaking his head. "I am beautiful and it's just a natural, genetic thing that I was blessed with upon my arrival from the womb. It's really just my good luck and my good genetics. You might have to worry about your looks considering the stubby, stumpy nature but I don't. It's an envious trait, I know, I know."

"An' yet, y've spent th' past ten minutes goin' on an' on about yer looks," George pointed out. "Tisn't exactly th'attitude of one who's uncaring."

"I'm confident," Nathan said, making no apologies. "There a problem with what I talk about? You did approach me for some conversation, man. I'm just giving you what you were so obviously begging for."

Ah, yes, accuse the street kid of begging. Always did go over well.

"Aye, there's a problem," he agreed. "But 'm sure y've heard about it before, an' I wouldn' want t'interrupt yer playing wit' yer balls anymore."

"Oh, how kind you are," Nathan said smugly (as he tended to be). "Me and my balls, we're very happy together and while I'd offer you the chance to show me how good you are, I'm getting the feeling that you might actually go have a cry or something now. Am I right?"

"Aye, I'll be crying into me pillow any moment now," he replied sarcastically. "An' thanks fer th'invite, but I like th'lasses. Don' be too rejected now. Tisn't ye, sweetheart, tis me."

"Oh, don't worry, I've got someone much hotter and a lot more flexible than you," Nathan assured him picking up a few more nachos and grinning. "She has the parts I want and I'd much prefer her playing with my balls than you. So, don't worry, mate, my heart's just fine and I won't spare you another thought while you're going to have your ugly cry."

"Poor lass. She should think better of herself than t'waste herself on ye," he said sadly. "Tis a sad state fer a lass t'find herself in. Someone should be lettin' her know she's got options."

"What, options like you?" Nathan asked, raising an eyebrow. "I don't know, man, you look a little...subpar. Is there another choice for all the lasses out there? Maybe a blowup doll with hair better than yours?"

George snorted. "That's yer comeback? Truly? That me hair be ugly. Becaause tis true, tisn't what th'lasses are lookin' at usually."

"Yeah, I think I'm gonna take a big pass on your oh so educational statements about what girls want," Nathan decided, already heading back down the bowling lane so he could pick up his game. "Good luck though, mate. I wish you and the future Mrs. Stubby Stumps the best of luck."

"Enjoy yer solitary balls, lad," he replied, rolling his eyes as he turned away.

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Fast Eddie' | Evening | Friday | March 25

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