Long-Term Finance Class [Community Center, Thursday evening]

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There were two very unique personalities at the front of the classroom in the community center: one tall, blond and almost glowing (though never, he'd tell you, sparkling) with paleness, and the other was shorter, darker, and showing all of the signs of only having a casual (if any) acquaintance with personal hygiene. The taller one spoke first. "I am Eric Northman," he began, "and this is a class to teach you about learning the tricks of long-term personal finance. After all," he smiled, looking slightly fangy, "if you are planning to live forever, it just won't do to be poor throughout."

Jack nodded solemnly. "And since this is our first class together, please give us your names, how rich you are, where your money is located and if it is well protected--" he trailed off under Eric's withering stare. "Just those first two things," he amended, "and once we're done with that, I shall teach you to cheat at cards."

Eric didn't say anything about that part. Gambling was a viable way to make money as long as you cheated better than the other guy.