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fandomtownies2011-05-16 12:17 am
fh-vikings.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomtownies2011-05-16 12:17 am
The Isle of Ikea, Middle of the Night - Then Parts Elsewhere!
It had been hovering there, just out of reach, for almost two weeks: Blue and blocky, smelling occasionally of meat and lingonberries, beguiling the Vikings near Þingvallavatn Lake with the urge to attack, plunder, and...randomly, build bookcases.
And finally the urge became too much.
With a cry of rage and under the cover of darkness, the men of the village grabbed their weapons, launched the longboats and set sail across the waters toward the Isle of Ikea. Unlike the island they were butted up against, this one was staffed only with frightened people in ugly shirts: no magic or weaponry at all, if you didn’t count the allen wrenches, and after a brief scuffle, the Vikings discovered that they didn’t.
“Sýna okkur fjársjóður þinn!” Erik demanded, shaking his axe threateningly. “Eða annars ég mun rífa nefið frá augliti þínu og láta þig borða það!” (Show us your treasures, or else I will pull your nose from your face and make you eat it!)
“Um, we speak English here?” one of the employees pointed out in a quavery little voice.
“Is that a real axe?” a second asked.
“Do you like meatballs?” another, unwise one offered.
“Meatball?” Sven repeated. There was a brief discussion among the Vikings.
“MEATBALLS!” they demanded.
Five minutes later and the longboats were being stocked with as many cases of meatballs (and pretty, affordable vases) as the Vikings could haul away, which was very lucky for them. Fandom Island had had enough.
Enough of fish, enough of variable mid-temperate weather, and enough of o’s with little lines attached to them where little lines didn’t belong. (Not, however, enough of lingonberries. There were never enough lingonberries.)
The Vikings had barely launched from the Isle of Ikea before it flickered and disappeared along with its larger and less affordably-priced life-partner, only to re-materialize moments later in a far more sun-kissed climate.
(With only one Viking left on Fandom, thank you. The one who had no pulse, no love of sun-kissed climates, and a passing acquaintance with body wash.)
[OOC: Welcome to Egypt! More detailed descriptions of our new surroundings will be forthcoming.]
And finally the urge became too much.
With a cry of rage and under the cover of darkness, the men of the village grabbed their weapons, launched the longboats and set sail across the waters toward the Isle of Ikea. Unlike the island they were butted up against, this one was staffed only with frightened people in ugly shirts: no magic or weaponry at all, if you didn’t count the allen wrenches, and after a brief scuffle, the Vikings discovered that they didn’t.
“Sýna okkur fjársjóður þinn!” Erik demanded, shaking his axe threateningly. “Eða annars ég mun rífa nefið frá augliti þínu og láta þig borða það!” (Show us your treasures, or else I will pull your nose from your face and make you eat it!)
“Um, we speak English here?” one of the employees pointed out in a quavery little voice.
“Is that a real axe?” a second asked.
“Do you like meatballs?” another, unwise one offered.
“Meatball?” Sven repeated. There was a brief discussion among the Vikings.
“MEATBALLS!” they demanded.
Five minutes later and the longboats were being stocked with as many cases of meatballs (and pretty, affordable vases) as the Vikings could haul away, which was very lucky for them. Fandom Island had had enough.
Enough of fish, enough of variable mid-temperate weather, and enough of o’s with little lines attached to them where little lines didn’t belong. (Not, however, enough of lingonberries. There were never enough lingonberries.)
The Vikings had barely launched from the Isle of Ikea before it flickered and disappeared along with its larger and less affordably-priced life-partner, only to re-materialize moments later in a far more sun-kissed climate.
(With only one Viking left on Fandom, thank you. The one who had no pulse, no love of sun-kissed climates, and a passing acquaintance with body wash.)
[OOC: Welcome to Egypt! More detailed descriptions of our new surroundings will be forthcoming.]