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The Perk: Wednesday Afternoon

He had intended it to be a quick trip across the country to check out a clinic in Texas but like most things in Bruce's life it had gone awry.

The clinic in question was doing experimental work in treatments for radiation exposure. Unfortunately while it worked well people with normal physiology for Bruce it was a complete flop. Especially since the "doctor" doing these treatments turned out to be using unethical treatments on humans. It had gotten messy at one point and caused the emergence of the "other guy" which led to... Well, more messiness. This of course led to more complications as Bruce's actions had gotten the attention of the military, so the trip back to Fandom had been a slow and cautious one. Crossing over the causeway, Bruce was able to breathe a small sigh of relief. Granted the island was a strange place but it was off the map and hopefully not one easily found. Bruce made his way through town to the Perk, where he settled down with a nice cup of decaffinated tea and his laptop where he started investigating the existence of a certain "swami" in India who was well known for teaching meditative techniques.

And there might have been a brief google search on Betty to see what she might be up to. Shut up. He could do that if he wanted.

(Hiatus? What hiatus? Open!)

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Google was an amazing thing, if you asked Holmes. Amazing.

So, you can pardon him for standing behind you to look at the screen, right Bruce? Riiiiight.

Bruce looked over his shoulder once or twice wondering if this guy was actually looking at his computer. The third time he confirmed that the guy was looking at his computer. The fourth time he decided to say something.

"Um. Can I help you?" he asked politely.

"Tea would be lovely," Holmes admitted sweetly.

See that look Holmes? It's bafflement. You've baffled Bruce Banner. He's a genius you know.

"I think they have some over there," Bruce suggested pointing in the general direction of the barista who had given Bruce a deadly look when he requested decaffeinated tea.

We won't get into why decaf is important for the moment, okay?

Holmes shot him a look for that. "You offered," he said, as though talking to a particularly slow child.

"I don't work here," Bruce said politely but with a small edge to his voice. "So I really can't get you a cup of tea."

And then for whatever reason Bruce then said "Sorry."

He wasn't really sorry.

He should be sorry. Holmes gave him another firm look before he turned the focus on Bruce's tea.

The tea that Bruce was now sliding to the other side of the table away from Holmes.

"I'm sure the staff here would be happy to help you," Bruce replied beginning to wonder if this guy had any money.

Not that Bruce had any money but he could probably sympathize with that.

Why did everyone think he was a hobo? Whatever had he done to deserve this treatment?

"Ah, but this is much more interesting."

Might be the shabby look there Holmes. Not that Bruce should throw stones.

"You mean trying scam a free drink while invading my privacy?" Bruce asked with a half-amused look. "Or did I miss something."

Still keeping the tea away from you, Holmes.

"If I were to 'scam' the drink, I would have simply taken it while you were so enthralled with the wonders of her majesty's empire in India."

"Oh, you think you could?" Bruce said with a raised eyebrow. "Well thanks for not pilfering me while I was distracted."

"It was only polite," Holmes replied, taking a seat. Since it was there.

Well no one else was using it.

"Clearly you've been to charm school," Bruce joked as he signaled the barista to bring a cup of tea over to the table. "Top of your class?"

Bruce was a kind, kind man like that. "Well, I passed."

"Congratulations," Bruce replied as the tea arrive. "I'm Bruce Banner. Nice to meet you."

"Holmes," he replied. "A pleasure, I'm sure, Mr. Banner."

"Surely," Bruce said leaning back in his chair. "So what is it that you do here on the island Mr. Holmes?"

"I dabble," Holmes replied, placing the cup back down now that he'd tasted the... interesting concoction they called tea. "At the moment, in teaching."

Maybe Holmes should stick with coffee. It's supposed to be good at the Perk.

"So you teach up at the school?" Bruce asked. "What course?"

Coffee... something vaguely poisonous... tea...

"Methods of disguise," Holmes replied, pouring more sugar than strictly healthy into his cup to mask the foul taste.

Sure. Be paranoid Sherlock.

"Oh? Are you in disguise now?"

Paranoia was perfectly healthy!

Holmes smiled in a manner that one might call 'Bitch please'. "Not at the moment. I'll be certain to let you know when I am."

"I'll look forward to it," Bruce said returning the same grin. "Been on the island long? I was only here a brief time before taking an extended visit off-island."

"Where to?" Holmes asked, testing the tea once more. He'd drunk worse.

"Texas," Bruce answered as he leaned back in his chair and closed his laptop. "There was a medical treatment I was looking into."

"Ill, Mr. Banner?"

"I have a certain condition," Bruce replied with a vague wave. "It tends to flare up at in opportune moments."

As weird as this town was, Clint was grateful for the little spots of normalcy, like the coffee shop where the baristas were learning not to judge him when took his coffee and added seven sugars to it. The fact that he hadn't yet imbibed said coffee was why it took him a moment to notice who else was there.

"Dr. Banner?" he asked, lowering his voice a little. "What are you doing here?" Had he missed an email already?

Bruce let out a small sigh. Did everyone know him on this island?

"Well at the moment I'm having a cup of tea," Bruce admitted with a slight baffled look. "And I'm afraid you have me at a loss. Have we met?"

That...wasn't the answer Clint was expecting at all. "Uh, yeah. A few weeks ago? Manhattan? Some aliens who decided to mess with the wrong folks?"

And that wasn't something Bruce expected at all as well.

"Aliens?" Bruce asked in disbelief. "A few weeks ago I was making my way back from Texas to this place."

He paused for a second. "Are you new to the island? The last time I was here I was recognized by... well a lot of people. From different timelines and worlds."

Clint sighed and sat down at the table next to Bruce. "Yeah, I've been here for a few days now," he said. "Heard something about evil goats. Met my literal red-headed twin. Different timelines though, that's new." He was starting to wonder how long it would take before things stopped being new. "I'm Clint, by the way. It's--well, it's nice to meet you again, for what that's worth."

Evil goats?

Bruce was not going to ask about the evil goats.

"Clint? I hope you don't mind me asking but exactly what were the circumstances of us meeting?" Bruce asked. "Because I have to admit I think there are at least three different versions of me that people have met and I'm not sure which one you've run into."

Clint sat back in his seat, trying to piece together an answer from what he'd learned had happened while he was compromised, what he'd seen for himself, and what seemed like it wouldn't freak Bruce out too much. "There was this artifact that...went missing. Was stolen, really. SHIELD brought you in to try to locate it, because it was giving off low levels of gamma radiation, and who better to figure out a way to track something like that than you?"

"Certainly sounds like my area of expertise," Bruce replied in a wry manner. "Hopefully one of my conditions of employment was that my method wasn't shared with a certain army general."

"I think that condition might have gone without saying," Clint said reassuringly. "SHIELD has no interest in getting you to work against your own interests."

Forgive him Clint. Bruce hasn't met Nick Fury yet.

"You'll understand if I take that with a healthy dose of skepticism," Bruce replied leaning back in his chair. "So far my relationship with any type of military establishment hasn't ended well. I'm assuming you're a part of SHIELD?"

"I work for them, yes." That felt less like saying he was an integral part of the organization or anything. "We didn't know you were here, I swear. Turns out there's a lot about this place we didn't know." That was going to make Fury's good eye twitch, and Clint almost wished he could be there to see it.

"That's one of the factors I like about this place," Bruce admitted. "No one really seems to know about it."

Then again everyone seemed to know Bruce but since none were from his timeline, he was less wary about it.

"And when you say 'we' I assume that you are speaking of SHIELD at large or are there others on your island who might know who I am?"

"I meant SHIELD at large, but there is someone else with me. Her name's Natasha. We all worked together," Clint said. "She's going to be glad to see you, even with the timeline stuff."

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The Perk: Wednesday Afternoon

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