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J,GoB, Saturday Morning

Busy career woman Juliet L. Darling rested her fingertips on her Chanel-covered 39-week baby bump as she tapped swiftly away at her iPad. A flax-acai berry muffin and a soy decaf latte rested on the table before her, but she wasn't eating or drinking. She needed to finalize Darling Incorporated's hostile purchase of land on a small but crucial island nation before she went into labor, and that was taking all her concentration.

A calendar reminder marked as urgent flashed across her iPad screen, and Juliet cursed when she read it. She kept forgetting to find her baby's father; she should probably make time to do that in the next day or so, too.

It was so hard to be a glamorous, hard-working, yet fabulously wealthy single mom to be.

[OOC: Open, especially to babydaddy wannabes.]

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No longer dripping wet from his hours spent in the ocean after his accident that he couldn't remember, the amnesiac Bruce wandered into J,GoB. If he was going to rediscover his lost memories and his wife and maybe figure out why he had extra mystery wedding rings, he was going to need some kind of pasty for breakfast.

On his way to the counter, he saw a pretty girl. Apparently some things were instinctual, so he went to her first.

"Hello," Bruce greeted as he walked over to Juliet. "I was wondering if you could help me with something."

"Juliet..." It had been so long since Tony had seen her. No, he wasn't Tony anymore. He hadn't been Tony since the Skywalkers had killed his father and that diamond mine exploded.

He was... Benedict Swaddlepants. It didn't sound fake at all!

Maybe Jeremy Darling – notorious playboy and disgraced brother to Juliet – shouldn't have been here. His drug debts were starting to be not insignificant, and showing his face in public without bodyguards was getting unwise. But he knew he had to come here, to try and reason with his dear beloved sister. Maybe she'd help him, even after all he'd done to tarnish their family's reputation.

He looked a wreck (though not so realistically as to lose any of his fanbase) as he stumbled into the bakery. "Juliet, you have got to help me."

Juliet squinted at Bruce, as if trying to remember him. there were so many handsome men, so many moonlit nights...

"Maybe," she said breathily. "What would it be?"

Juliet gasped, as if seeing a ghost.

A very, very attractive ghost. She'd assumed Tony had died in the explosion!

"...can it be?"

"I told you, Jeremy," Juliet said, sorrow a wobbly undertone in her crisp voice. "I can't help you any more until you're ready to clean up your act once and for all."

No! He couldn't be Tony Stark. Not until he'd enacted his revenge.

"Benedict Swaddlepants," he said easily, offering a hand. Because it was that easy to fool people. Really.

"I have amnesia, but you... you seem familiar. Do I know you?" Bruce asked.

Truth be told, he'd used that same line to pick up girls at bars when he had his memory.

"Maybe," Juliet said, then nodded. "Yes. In fact, I know you rather well. Do you remember a snowed-in night in Naples, during a cold weeekend about nine months ago?"

She rubbed her stomach then, just to make the significance of the timeline clearer.

"Juliet Darling," Juliet said, still pale as she took his hand. "Forgive me, Benedict. I thought you might be ... someone rather dear to me."

"Dear?" His life had never been the same since those terrible days last year. He'd given up so much in pursuit of his revenge.

"No, I don't. Because of the amnesia," Bruce pointed out. "Are you trying to imply something?"

He hoped she wasn't trying to imply something.

She was trying to imply something.

"There's no easy way to say this," Juliet sighed. "I think you may be the father of my child."

"My first love," Juliet said sadly. "It might not have meant much to him, but our weekend together in the Catskills when I was 14 set my heart afire. Never since have I loved like that."

She smiled bitterly. "But it's hardly your problem ... Benedict."

"I--I understand that kind of love," Tony--Benedict--assured her. "It sounds beautiful. Like you."

AND YOUR BABY.

Bruce gasped.

"We wouldn't happen to be married, would we?" Bruce checked. "Or maybe we were married but aren't anymore?"

He held up his ring finger with the newest wedding ring on it. He needed to know what her reaction to that was so he could know how he should react.

Juliet glanced down demurely. "Oh, I'm nothing much to look at these days. But once upon a time ..."

Edited 2012-11-03 18:50 (UTC)

Juliet had to think about it for a moment. "I remember something with you in a tuxedo," she said hopefully. "No, wait, I think that was just a benefit. But I would never have -- fallen for you, if I knew you were married."

"Oh, no, this is just from last week. It has the date inscribed and everything," Bruce said. "But this changes things. If that is my child, no one can ever know. I wouldn't want my wife to find out."

"Whoever she is."

"I think you're beautiful." And if only that child was his. He could finally settle down and have the life he'd dreamed of as a child.

"I spent the last week on a business retreat," Juliet assured him. "I wish it was my ring, but it's not. Anyhow, I don't need your money. Maybe just -- send a letter, once or twice a year, so our child feels a little less alone in the cold, cruel world?"

Juliet gave him a hopeful look. "I don't suppose you want to have a child...."

"One day..." One day. "My... fiance, Jaina, has a child."

SOMEHOW.

"Assuming I don't get double amnesia, and there's a secret paternity test to prove that it is mine, that's the least I can do," Bruce said. "I promise."

"...oh," Juliet said, deflating. "Jaina is a very lucky woman, then. If only we'd bumped into each other a few months ago... but I guess some things are meant to stay in the past."

"I understand why you'd want a paternity test," Juliet nodded, though a bit wistfully. "Thank you. And ... I hope your amnesia reverses itself soon."

"Another lifetime," he whispered wistfully. "Who is the lucky father?"

Juliet shook her head. "I -- it's complicated," she said, lowering her voice. "I was brainwashed into joining a cult for a few weeks this winter and can't remember a thing about it. I might have gotten pregnant then. It's so awkward."

"So do I. I'd love to remember you and possibly the night that led to what could be my child," Bruce said. "Since we're on the subject, can you think of any other places we might have spent any special nights together? I've been told that if I hit my head in a familiar place, I might be cured."

Well, that sounded legit.

"Are you alright?" Tony asked, suddenly reaching out to touch her elbow. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Juliet thought about it. "There was a cult I joined in the Amazon for a couple weeks," she suggested. "It was kind of a self-help, new age thing with a secret seedy underside. I was trying to forget ... things."

The music boomed then, as if suggesting the things were too dark to mention."

"You tried to forget... I forget because of massive head trauma. Funny how life works sometimes," Bruce said with a light chuckle.

"But it's hard, and I'm weak!" Jeremy exclaimed, slumping melodramatically into a chair. "I can't change on my own."

Juliet smiled winsomely. "Be my friend?" she asked. "I'm fine, but I have so many people who want something from me. Right now, I really want a guy who will ... just be a friend."

Possibly a naked friend, once she'd recovered from childbirth and he'd ditched his fiancee, but why get ahead of herself?

Oh, totally a naked friend after they finally ditched the things holding them back. Only to then be interrupted by a kidnapping mid-honeymoon. "Of course. I'll always bet there for you, Juliet."

"I've heard that before, but I can't keep bailing you out. I have somebody else to think about now," Juliet said, gesturing to her bump. "But what do you think you need this time?"

Edited 2012-11-03 21:22 (UTC)

"It is," Juliet agreed. "But I guess we have to muddle through somehow."

But a little kidnapping could never stop true love! At least not unless somebody wanted out of their contract.

"Then I'm glad we ran into each other," Juliet beamed. "Thank you."

"Protection." He refrained, just this once, from being classless and pointing out that was something she could have benefited from, nine months ago. He wasn't drunk enough for that. "They're after me, Juliet. If it keeps up like this, I'm going to have to go into exile."

Hey. Her unplanned child was a gift from God!

... and possibly from some Amazon rain forest native liqueur. Ahem.

"Then you're putting me at risk just by being here," she said, though not without concern. She finally set the iPad aside. "Could you check into rehab? It might solve two problems at once."

"No!"

That was a pretty dramatic no given in response to a reasonable suggestion. But such was Jeremy's life. "I can't go in to rehab, you know that! Not after... that thing. You know."

He had trauma.

"That thing," Juliet repeated, folding her arms and tapping the tip of one shoe against the table. "I know it was awful, but it can't be your excuse forever."

She poked at her iPad again dismissively. "But I suppose I could order a bodyguard or two for you, if you really need it."

She didn't want her brother dead, after all. It'd be bad publicity.

"I do. This is life and death, Juliet. Life and death." Also entirely his own fault but when had that ever held him back from shoving his problems onto other people? "Thank you. I don't know how I'll repay you."

Let's face it, he probably wouldn't.

"You probably won't," Juliet said flatly. "Just try not to show up drunk or stoned at the baptism. I don't want to have to pay for it if you trip and wreck the church."

Black sheep brothers were expensive things.

"I won't." He probably would. But maybe there'd be a few other scandals to distract from that. Wasn't that what usually happened at shindigs like that? "I'll try, Juliet. That's all I can say. I'm only human."

"I know, and it's part of why I love you," Juliet said, more gently now. "I just -- worry. It's my prerogative as a sister."

Though there were certainly more than enough other scandals on her mind...

Edited 2012-11-03 23:53 (UTC)

"I know." He reached over the table for her hand. "And you get to have that. Just don't ever leave me, okay? Everyone always leaves me."

Because the writers had never been able to decide whether to make him sympathetic or just a complete disaster you were supposed to love to hate.

She squeezed his hand back, softening yet more. The writers tended to forget she was supposed to be a bit of an ice princess when she was around her brother.

"I won't, but promise me the same thing," she said, blinking back tears. "We've lost so much, Jeremy. I can never, ever lose you."

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J,GoB, Saturday Morning

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