Town Hall, Saturday

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

Ron Swanson opened a door and stepped into a nightmare.

There was a banana. On his desk.

A banana.

A half-unpeeled banana.

"Mgsdksjflkfj," said Ron, and fled into the hallway to find a plastic bag.

Once located, he wrapped it around his hand. He picked up the banana - gingerly - by the back of its... by the back. He moved it very carefully towards the garbage can. Then he dropped it.

"Eugh," he said. "Assistant! I need you to take out the garbage."

[[ open! ]]

Comments

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Yesterday had not been a day for finding out things; a combined sugar-crash and mild hangover, plus cleaning up the mess they'd made of Bo's tub, had kept Kenzi at Casa Succubabe for the day.

But now she kind of felt like she owed it to Grace (and Toby, and Bo, and.. everyone) to see if there was any news.

"Hellloooo?" She stuck her head in the office. "Mr. Mayor Person?"

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

If she had been hoping for some kind of information or rescue plan, she had... arrived at the wrong mayor's office.

Ron - still looking troubled over that episode with the banana - didn't budge much. (There was also a (empty) sawed-off shotgun sitting on a swivel stand on his desk facing the door. ... sorry, Kenz.) "Yes?"

He really needed to get a new assistant. One who didn't let people in.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi was now eyeing that gun, trying to determine if it was loaded. "Hey. Sir. Kenzi... Soprano, one of the students up at the school." Hmm. "In fact, Student Council member. I'm here for the update about the mass disappearances."

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

"You're here for the update about the what?" Ron asked. He picked up a pen and started writing.

(What he was writing was: 'remember to fire assistant'. But she couldn't see that from there.)

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Hadn't anybody told him? Now she felt worse about not coming in yesterday. "Um. All the teachers, and students, who've vanished without a trace?" Kenzi looked a little more unsure now. "Shop owners? Tax-paying community members?" How was government gonna run if there was no one out there paying taxes for her?

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

"Someone is paying taxes?" Ron asked, sort of aghast.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"I ... guess?" What? Kenzi took a step back and leaned over to check the nameplate on the door again. Yup. Mayor. "I mean, it's Fandom. They might not be. Or maybe they're paying taxes in their home dimension, I don't know, I'm student..."

Back on track! "People. Are. Missing. What's the Mayor's office doing?"

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

"Since when are these people missing?" Ron said, mildly nonplussed. "They could simply be exercising their right to move."

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"Tuesday! At least Tuesday. And wouldn't they have left notes? Told people? Sold their houses?"... Damnit, now she felt the urge to go check out the Post Office and see if they knew anything.

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

"Do I look like I pay attention to paperwork?" Ron asked. It was a sensible question, all in all. "And do you have a firearm?"

These issues were connected.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"Not on me," Kenzi said cautiously. Eyeing that sawed-off. This was not going how she'd anticipated, much less how she hoped. Why the heck hadn't she realized that anyone working in Fandom would have to be waaaay different from any other public servant? "Why do you ask?"

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

"If you are absolutely certain that these people have disappeared, and not simply left or otherwise hidden themselves to avoid you," which he honestly saw as a possibility, "then we should form a search party. Since you do not have a firearm, I will be that search party."

He'd get to not have to talk to people. That was excellent.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"I can get one! And search." Aaaand... "That's it?" Kenzi sounded less incredulous than let down. "There's no Emergency Broadcast Service or National Guard to call in? No other higher authority to check with?" Awww, man. Just this guy? Crap.

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

"If I call the National Guard and explain to them that apparently almost our entire population has disappeared, there will be questions," Ron pointed out. "I would prefer not to deal with them."

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi wasn't even sure he was wrong about that, because the kind of questions they'd ask would be incredibly inconvenient, and... "Well, thanks for. Yeah." She glared mournfully at that shotgun. Because she'd be throwing a much bigger tantrum if it weren't for that, just to get her aggravation out. "You let me know about that search party. Sir."

[nomeatvirgin.livejournal.com]

"Oh, I will be leaving immediately," Ron promised her, getting up.

And he meant that. Hunting down lost civilians was actually useful, instead of sitting here leeching money off other people's accomplishments.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

That was something, anyway, right? Maybe? "Good luck with that."

The thought, what would Peter Wiggin do? crossed her mind. But since she didn't have an electorate to convince to invade somewhere, Kenzi sighed and wandered out.