Curiosities, Oddities and Antiques -- Formerly Things Reborn -- Monday

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

Okay, she'd had a weekend to get the jetlag out of her system, and she'd taken last night off so she could watch the Going Rogue finale, but there were no more excuses: Dr. Girlfriend had to go check out her new store today.

It seemed pretty straightforward, for an antiques store. Her first crate was already inside the store, just awaiting its grand unboxing. Nothing in this first shipment was stolen; it was just ... weird stuff that was supposed to make everything else blend in a little better.

Apparently "Oddities" meant a lot of shrunken heads? Gross. She was absolutely not putting out any of the preserved animal fetuses. The tribal decor, sure. Rattlesnake earrings? All right. And the Elvis-meets-ET painting? ... Well, bizarre was better than disgusting.

The sign on the window had already been repainted:

CURIOSITIES, ODDITIES AND ANTIQUES
Specializing in Hard-to-Find Items
We Buy Your Rarities - Inquire Within

She had to wonder if that was too subtle. She could fix it later, if it was. In the meantime, she added a "NOW HIRING" card to the window and went back to sorting through this ... stuff.

Comments

Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

If you'd like a friendly supervillainess to help you shop, or to offer your ill-gotten gains to, this is the place for it.

Or if you'd like a line on how to purchase something quasi-legal. The usual.

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[filleauloup]

When you walked a regular route (and a few irregular ones) around a small island five or six days a week, you noticed things like repainted signs on stores with new names. So naturally Éponine had to pause on her way past to peer in the window (the sign said 'curiosities,' and she felt the reaction was justified) for a few moments.

Until finally her own curiosity got the better of her, and she pushed the door open, shifting the strap of her mailbag on her shoulder as she did.

"Well, here's something new!" she exclaimed. IN THE RIGHT PLACE NOW WTF SELF

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

"It's our grand reopening," Dr. Girlfriend agreed, in a voice far deeper than the one Eponine was presumably expecting. "Under new management. I should have some kind of big gala event later in the week. Right now I'm just trying to sort these boxes."

That was not a very retail-appropriate response, so Sheila cleared her throat and tried again.

"Welcome to our humble store," she said. "Is there anything I can help you with?"

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[filleauloup]

. . . well. Yes, that was definitely a much deeper voice than expected, but it was actually a pleasant surprise that got a crooked little smile out of Éponine: her low, hoarse rasp wouldn't be the most unusual thing any more.

"Oh, I'm just looking at the moment," she answered; her usually unfocused gaze sharpened a bit as she took a quick glance around the shop. "I come by here all the time, and I saw things were different than last week, and I'm certain I haven't seen you about town before, so I had to stop and have a look, you see."

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

"Very observant of you," Dr. Girlfriend said, feeling a bit of kinship for the girl. Her voice was more alto than baritone, but they could still start a club. Invite some other husky-voiced brunettes. Was Kathleen Turner busy?

"We're keeping all the usual antiques, but we're adding in some specialties," she explained. "Rarities, hard-to-find artifacts. Although it seems like 'oddities' translates into 'disgusting crap that used to be alive.'"

She might have to change the sign. Who would buy that crap, seriously?!

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[filleauloup]

"Ah, yes, one of a kind stuff -- now that'll be the sort of thing to see that dinner's paid for!" Éponine looked speculative; did 'hard-to-find' mean the same sort of thing it did for people like Montparnasse and her father? She wouldn't ask outright, just to be on the safe side. She wandered over to peer into the crate at a shrunken head. "Since goodness knows, I don't know who'd want to buy that."

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

"Creepy, isn't it?" Sheila said with a shudder. She wasn't good at this retail gig. It wasn't like she had loads of experience with customer service. "At least the Elvis painting is just kitschy. It's not something that's going to come alive and try to eat my eyeballs in my sleep."

Dr. Girlfriend really, really didn't like the Oddities, okay?

"We buy as well as sell, in case you ever stumble across anything interesting," she said. "Sometimes people are sitting on treasures and they don't even know it."

That wasn't really the point of the buying half, but it wasn't a great idea to take out an ad in the local newspaper all WE SMUGGLE AND FENCE, CALL FOR OUR AFFORDABLE RATES here.

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[filleauloup]

"And wouldn't even know what they'd lost if it went missing," agreed Éponine with a disdainful little huff. "It's a waste, it is, if you ask me. Well, I haven't got anything of the sort myself, but I hear things about town. Shall I send people to come see you if they've a few things they'd like to get rid of?"

And possibly there might be something in it for her, later on, if she offered.

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

"Some people just don't appreciate what they have," Sheila said, in her most sympathetic tone. "It's a shame, is what it is."

That was about as far as she could go without encouragement, although wouldn't even know if it was missing sounded very promising.

"Absolutely," she agreed quickly. "I'm always available to take treasures right off people's hands. There are always buyers out there; sometimes you just need someone to get the two together."

Which was by way of a specialty of hers.

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[voiceoverdue]

Cecil was mostly just wandering around trying to work off a bit of his excess energy and trying not to miss ♥Carlos♥ too much. He perked up at the new store sign, though, and couldn't resist going in. Homesickness would do that.

"Oo, neat!" Some of those shrunken heads reminded him of toys he'd had when he was little.

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

"You like those?" Dr. Girlfriend asked, uncertainly. The shrunken heads were weirding her out. "I can offer you a deal on them. Bulk pricing, grand reopening discount."

Anything to get them out of the store where they wouldn't be staring at her. Ugh.

[voiceoverdue]

"Really?" Cecil perked up for a moment. "I don't know what I'd do with so many, though..." He chewed on his lip, then brightened again. "I bet the kids at the orphanage back home would love to get presents. Do you think shipping would cost very much?"

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

Presents. For kids at an orphanage. What had the poor kids done to deserve shrunken heads?

"I'm ... sure they'd be thrilled," she said, carefully. To the budding serial killer in aisle three. "I could work out some kind of a deal. On shipping. A grand ... opening ... celebration."

So that the shrunken heads would be out of her line of sight, and so that when Kid Psycho went berserk and started cutting up people, he maybe skipped over her house. Win/win.

[voiceoverdue]

"That would be wonderful!" Cecil tugged on the hair of one of the heads. "I haven't had one of these in ages. I'm so glad you opened this shop." He smiled at her. Was that the smile of a serial killer?

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

It was definitely the smile of someone who hadn't been hugged enough. Not that she was offering to rectify that problem. Because she wasn't.

"You ... have a collection of shrunken-head dolls," she said slowly. "Good. What happened to them?"

Do not ask him if he wants the preserved fetuses. Do not.

[voiceoverdue]

"Oh, not a collection," Cecil corrected. "I just used to get them sometimes. You know, at little league games and such. Hang them on the headboard for victory, burn them before playoffs. It's sort of nostalgia now. Though I am doing cheerleading! Maybe I'll bring them a few, too."

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

In-ter-est-ing. Kenzi was seeing goodies that maybe would look good in her and Bo's new place. Also, how rare were the rarities they were looking to buy?

"Hey ya. Cool place," Kenzi said, wandering in and looking around

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

"Thank you," said Dr. Girlfriend, in what she hoped passed for a suitably retail-like tone. "I learned today that 'oddities' doesn't just mean weird household objects."

Not putting out the animal fetuses. The Guild couldn't make her.

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Hold that line, Dr. Standards gotta be protected!

"What kind of odd are we talking? Brain-breaky-odd, or euuuugh odd?" Kenzi blinked a little at the woman's voice, but once you've had a pink pony for a teacher, everything else is something to move on from. She stopped to peer at the Elvis & E.T. painting. "I gotta ask, but-- people actually like this kind of art?"

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

"Preserved animal fetuses," Dr. Girlfriend said, unable to stop herself from shuddering. "In little mason jars. When your idea of decorating is preserved animal fetuses, maybe you need psychological help."

She gestured to the painting. "I can handle tacky more than the grotesque crap."

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi's squeak of inarticulate disgust was in full agreement. "Who--? Oh, I bet Doom decorates like that. UUuuuugh." She full-body shuddered, then reached out to pat the painting. "Oh, this is so much better. Weird. Stupid. But better than --why..?" Oh, this was gonna bug her all day now, jeez.

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

"Some people are creepy," Dr. Girlfriend said. "Or maybe they just want to look creepy and impress other people. I'd rather hang a hundred of those horrible Elvis paintings than look at more of these shrunken doll heads."

Re: Shop And/Or Inquire Within! - CUR

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi visibly shook it off, and then picked up an adorable china dog, the definition of kitsch. "So, I noticed the note on your sign, you buy stuff? Looking for anything in particular?" Ahem?

Mod Your Shopping - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

Buy some antiques without the gravelly-voiced doctor hovering nearby.

Don't worry: if you just want to buy something antique, you can totally do that without being concerned that it's stolen. The antique part of the store is totally legit.

OOC - CUR

[dr-manly-voice.livejournal.com]

I work from 3 EST to 8, and I have no internet access at work, so be patient with me if you happen to ping during those times please. :)