The Preserve, Saturday Afternoon

[justlurkinghere]

So, who didn't enjoy going on a mission given to you by a random stranger? At least it wasn't a grocery list quest. Those were legit the worst.

Derek looked around, keeping an ear out for any of those strange monsters lurking around as he came upon where the map led him.

Funny. Give the digging quest to the werewolf.

[[With one!]]

Comments

[newroutines]

Mike had brought a shovel. And he swore it was for the digging and not for hitting anything evil that tried to creep up on them.

He had a gun for that latter purpose.

"This is insane."

[justlurkinghere]

"You think?" Derek replied dryly. "Really?"

[newroutines]

"I'm just saying." You know, just the obvious. Maybe he was a little nervous. "I mean, even for our island, where random shit happens and gets done every day, this is pretty insane."

[justlurkinghere]

Derek sighed. "Just dig."

Because what other option was there?

[newroutines]

Not many. So Mike got to digging.

"Just don't let anything eat me, okay?"

[justlurkinghere]

"Who would fix the Netflix if you died?"

Of course he was going to keep you alive, Mike. Don't you give him more guilt issues by dying. Don't even.

[newroutines]

"... Stiles?"

Mike, that was rhetorical.

Also, he meant you.

[justlurkinghere]

"Ass." But Derek looked vaguely amused. Look at that!

[newroutines]

"Yeah, I have one and it's fantastic, thanks for noticing."

Mike could live with vaguely amused. Especially under these circumstances.

[justlurkinghere]

"Don't flatter yourself," Derek muttered, silently moving around him to keep an eye on the perimeter.

[newroutines]

"Hey now, people have literally paid to see my ass," Mike objected, and probably would have continued on that topic had his shovel not met something hard right then. "Oh hey, I think I've got something."

[justlurkinghere]

Derek was next to him in the next instant, squinting down at the box... thing. Damn his lack of description skills!

"That's it."

[newroutines]

Well, Mike would've said it was a chest... thing. And also red.

Well done, boys.

He kneeled by it, brushing the snow aside and eyeing the lock... thing. Okay, he assumed it was a lock.

[justlurkinghere]

"We can just drag it back," Derek suggested with a sigh. Meaning he would drag it back.

[newroutines]

"No, I think I can just ––"

He pressed at the lock thing. The chest opened smoothly on its own, revealing its contents: a couple of grenades, a red shotgun that said Mad Moxxi on the side (along with a small pin-up painting, presumably of Moxxi herself), and a submachine gun with purple detailing.

"... Okay then."

[justlurkinghere]

"...classy."

[newroutines]

Mike picked up the shotgun. "It's not what I was expecting."

Another thing he wasn't expecting? There was something big moving towards them in the woods. Along with a smaller something.

Mike didn't have the ears to detect them yet.

[justlurkinghere]

Derek turned his head to track it, carefully positioning himself between it and Mike. "Grab the rest and let's go."

[newroutines]

"What?" Mike asked, because he hated random orders like that, especially when they came with such protective body language. It was never a good sign. "What is it?"

That's when he heard them too. Meaning they were close.

"Shit."

[pandora-baddies.livejournal.com]

And that was when the bullymongs showed up from between the trees. The bigger one was about the size of a car, had a car been able to stand upright and also had an absurdly small head compared to its bulky limbs. Of which there were six. Two smaller hind legs, four arms, though it was using them all to walk. The smaller one was the same, except about a quarter of the big one's size.

The big one promptly grabbed a large branch and threw it at the humans.

[justlurkinghere]

Derek shoved at Mike to get him out of the way, eyes flashing blue. "Move. I can hold them off."

[newroutines]

Mike... okay, Mike was grabbing the contents of the chest because they looked useful, okay, and they'd come all this way and maybe he was bad at stressful situations.

"Move, what, am I supposed to run away?"

Probably, considering the way the smaller bullymong was hopping closer to them, while the bigger looked for something else to throw.

[justlurkinghere]

"Unless you know how to use one of those," Derek snapped, letting claws grow as he moved toward the smaller bullymong.

[newroutines]

The monglet tried to jump at Derek, and swipe at him with one of its arms. Mike, meanwhile, acted on some stupid instinct and got one of the guns, to aim it at the big bullymong, and pull the trigger. At which point two things happened:
1. The big bullymong actually growled and backed down a bit. that was great.
2. The gun made the most awful sound which some might have described as a stream of "YEAHYEAHYEAHYEAHYEAH!" going on forever, but which was really just continuous high-pitched screaming of the most annoying sort. That was less great.

Apologies to your ears for that one, Derek. Possibly Isaac and Jackson's ears too, actually, wherever they were.

"... the fuck?"

[justlurkinghere]

Which was why Derek was now on the ground. Whimpering. BECAUSE SERIOUSLY. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ABOUT?

[newroutines]

"Holy shit."

Yeah, Mike was just going to drop that gun right now. At this second. They clearly didn't need it. And then he grabbed the shovel instead, and whacked the small bullymong over the head with it, because no way was he fucking around with guns right now when that had happened. "Dude, what the fuck, are you okay?"

Could he even hear right now?

[justlurkinghere]

"I'm fine," Derek ground out, scrambling up to rip into the bullymong with his claws before it got any ideas about attacking Mike.

[newroutines]

Mike was pretty sure he would've said that even if he wasn't, but he also appreciated the protective instincts because he would probably have gotten killed otherwise.

The small bullymong was really no match for claws (at least not anywhere near its head, which was a vulerable spot) buuuut the other one was advancing on them too.

"Okay I'm starting to be in favor of running."

[justlurkinghere]

"Run," Derek growled around fangs. Because that was what you get from werewolves, okay? He pulled his claws through the creature's neck under the assumption it was a weak spot on everything.

SNAKES CAN'T BE POISONED BY THEIR OWN VENOM, OKAY?

And then, without an shred of self-preservation, turned toward the larger bullymong.

[newroutines]

"What, hey, you're supposed to run with me!"

The bullymong gave no damns about this conversation. It was still coming closer, and getting ready to swipe at Derek with one of its burly arms.

[justlurkinghere]

He had issues with protecting people, okay? Just deal with it.

He also had issues with being smacked to the ground by a giant monster. So, there was that. That was less nice for him.

[newroutines]

Much less nice, as far as Mike was concerned. Especially since that made him feel like maybe he should try whacking this bullymong with the shovel too.

Which he did. And he was totally going "oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck" under his breath while he was doing it, too.

"Get up, we really need to go!"

[justlurkinghere]

Damn it, Mike!

Derek shook himself to clear his head, seeing how close Mike was to the thing. Which wasn't okay with him. Not okay at all. He propelled himself up onto his feet to grab Mike and run.

Do try to keep up, Mikey.

[newroutines]

Oh, Mike was going to do his best. Even while clutching a shovel and a gun (the Moxxi one, not the horrible screeching one) because somehow he hadn't managed to let go.

He was never, ever going on missions assigned by crazy scientist ladies on other planets ever again.