The Perk: Late Monday Evening

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

Reality bent yet again. Flashes of red, yellow and grey were seen. Then another flash of a neon sign where only the word "king" could blurrily be seen.

And finally a flash of green and yellow as a young man appeared in mid air right before crashing on to a table which caused several other young men to appear who looked exactly like the first.

"Where are we?"
"What happened to the perk?"
"Joffrey is going to be pissed when he sees they redecorated."
"Look! Pie!"

Jamie sighed and pulled himself off the ground and absorbed his dupes. He looked carefully around at the perk and sighed.

And successfully squashed the urge to make jokes about Kansas.

[Available off and on during the evening.]

Comments

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

Allie had been indulging in her occasional habit of a fragrant cup of coffee and a good book when Jamie appeared.

"Well that's one way to make an entrance," she observed cautiously.

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Um... Thanks?" Jamie said as he dusted himself off. "I've probably done better. I don't suppose you might tell me where the heck I am without thinking I'm nuts?

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"I made a wrong turn across the causeway and had to ask the same question myself a while back," Allie admitted. "Here is the Perk. On Fandom Island. Is this where you want to be?"

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

Jamie looked around the room and frowned. "This isn't right. I was in Fandom and in the perk. This is not the perk I was just in."

He gave Allie a suspicious look. "This isn't a trick is it?"

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

Allie shook her head. "Not me. The island, well that's another story. Weird things have been happening for a while now."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Isn't that just an every day occurrence?" Jamie said with a smirk. "Last week I had an hour long debate with a toilet. Seriously though, if this is Fandom these perk guys are going to be in a heap of trouble if they don't put the Lannister coat of arms back up. "

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"You might have a point there, about the weirdness." After all, Allie had spent Friday night watching wee rats get plastered on rum. "But I have no idea who the Lannisters are, or why their coat of arms should be on the wall."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

Jamie blinked a few times and it took a moment or two for Allie's words to register.

"Wait. Wait. Who's in charge here?" He asked in disbelief.

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"There's a woman named Winchester in charge up at the school. Some weird guy named Ron is the mayor and my friend Jake is the sheriff," she listed. "I going to take a guess that that's not the same as where you're from?"

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"No, but I'm from Fandom and those guys don't even sound familiar!" Jamie replied. "And trust me those are guys you don't want to mess around with. "

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"I'm not saying you're not from Fandom," Allie told him, her thoughts racing a mile a minute. "Just maybe not this particular Fandom. I said weird things had been happening, this might be part of that. The last few weeks people have been hearing things, conversations, but no one's been around. Or they'd see things but a second later they were gone. Maybe this, you being here, is part of it."

And if that was the case, Allie was going to be spending another night criss-crossing the island just in case any rabids wandered through.

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

Jamie pondered that for a second and nodded. "Okay. Given that this is still Fandom island that sounds almost plausible. Give me a sec and maybe I can find something out. "

Jamie clambered down to the floor and sat down into the Lotus position. Then frowned.

"I don't suppose you have some incense on you?"

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"Would a vanilla latte work?" she offered, holding out her coffee cup.

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

Jamie sniffed at the latte and frowned. "Soy, skim or 2%?"

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

Allie shrugged. "Honestly I have no clue. I just ask them to make me something that smells nice. I'm a vampire so it's not like I drink it."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

Jamie frowned. "Okay. I just have to check... You don't sparkle in sunlight do you?"

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"I'd set myself on fire if I did," Allie grumbled. "The stupid book was ridiculous."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Fair enough," Jamie said and closed his eyes. Mumbling an incantation, Jamie slowly began to levitate off the floor. He floated there for a minute or so before there was a flash of light.

Jamie crashed to the floor.

"Okay. I've concluded this is the same Fandom and I've traveled two thousand years into the future," Jamie said pulling himself off the floor. "What year is it?"

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

Allie's eyebrow was just going to stay up in the middle of her forehead for a bit after that show.

"It's March of 2014. You look pretty good for an old guy."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

Whoops!

"Hmm. Might have overshot that number," Jamie said with a sigh as he pulled himself off the floor. "Slight correction, I've gone about fifty years in the past. Which explains the change in decor but not why my spell malfunctioned."

He shook his head and put his hands in his trenchcoat. "Either I messed up that spell or that was half and half in that latte."

He then frowned as he pulled a sock puppet of his coat pocket. "Where the hell did that come from?"

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"Haven't got the foggiest about the sock," she shrugged. "But the spell? It could just be part of the weirdness."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Right. The weirdness," Jamie said with a frown. "Voices, visions and a perk crew that uses half and half in their lattes. I may have to call in the big guns."

Jamie reached into his pocket and pulled out another sock puppet.

Frowning, he tossed the sock pocket to the side and pulled out a cell phone and dialed a number.

"Hello? I need... who is this?"

Jamie frowned. "And this is 555-3321? Sorry. Nevermind."

"All right," he said sitting down across from Allie. "Just tried to call my boss and all I got was a starbucks. So much for the big guns."

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"We've got some big guns of our own if that helps." Allie was already planning on filling Kitty in on what was happening.

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Are we talking literal big guns or are we being figurative here?" Jamie asked. "Unless there's a Cable here which in that case it might be both."

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"A combination of both," she explained. "A bunch of supernatural types, a hunter, a space marine with some pretty cool powers. We can usually hold our own."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"And just to confirm there's no prepubescent kid running the town and shooting crossbow bolts at innocent bunny rabbits, correct?" Jamie asked.

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

Allie shook her head. "Nope, not that I've seen and I've been all over this island most nights."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Okay, good to know," Jamie said sighing in relief. "Is there a place to stay on the island? I highly doubt the principal will let me stay in my old- I mean future room."

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"There's the hotel I suppose, or some warehouses if you'd rather keep a lower profile. And if not, well, I've got a couch if want for a night or two." She didn't mind offering her couch. It just meant she'd go to ground for the day out in the preserve.

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Well I appreciate the offer," Jamie said gratefully. "But I'll probably hit the hotel and see if they take credits. Otherwise I may take you up on that offer."

[allie-vamp.livejournal.com]

"Talk to Nick, he should be able to help you out," Allie said. "And if not, I'm in MCA 6. I'll be there by dawn."

[veryhighq.livejournal.com]

Another portal opened down the street later on. Being an experienced worlds traveler, Johnny recognized a new place when he saw it. And even better, he recognized a non-oppressive coffee shop when he saw it.

Imagine his surprise when he saw somebody from Joffrey's Fandom there. "Madrox? What are you doing here?"

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Well, Johnny, I was going through town when all of a sudden there was a rabbit with a very large pocket watch running through town screaming that it was late, " Jamie began. "Long story short I went through a portal; ended up here and then made up a story about a rabbit in case you showed up."

Apparently in different AUs, most Jamies were smart asses.

[veryhighq.livejournal.com]

"I don't buy it. You would have made up the rabbit story for anyone, not just me," Johnny joked. "So you came through a portal, too? I wonder how many of those there were."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Actually I had a story for you, one for Joffrey, one for Tywin and another one for Underwood," Jamie said with a smirk. "And if anyone else showed up, I'd just hit on them."

[veryhighq.livejournal.com]

"In that case, I'm happy I got the rabbit," Johnny said. "Have you seen anyone else from Fandom here?"

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Well apparently this is Fandom," Jamie replied. "So technically everyone is from here. Though originally from someplace else."

Jamie Madrox. He's so helpful.

[veryhighq.livejournal.com]

"Really? Huh," Johnny said. "I always figured Fandom was one of a kind... Do they have a Principal Joffrey here?"

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Same Fandom but about forty years in the past," Jamie replied with a shake of his head. "Apparently the principal is named Winchester, the mayor is named Ron and most importantly: I've met a vampire and she doesn't sparkle."

[veryhighq.livejournal.com]

"Is she cute?" Johnny checked. His priorities were his priorities. "Because only cute vampire girls can make this place even better."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Duh. It's Fandom," Jamie said with an eyeroll. "Have you ever seen an ugly vampire in Fandom?"

[veryhighq.livejournal.com]

"I had a workshop with Count Orlock last summer," Johnny said. "After looking at him for a few months, I don't make assumptions."

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Maybe he was pretty on the inside," Jamie suggested. "Though to be serious, I'm not sure what we need to do at this point. I'm not sure if we can get back if we wanted to. I even tried to call Dr. Strange but all I got was a Starbucks."

[veryhighq.livejournal.com]

"If you can't magic up a trip back, then as far as I'm concerned, we're supposed to get a good night's sleep for once and worry about everything else tomorrow," Johnny said. "Maybe wake up early and see if any portals back pop up."

He wasn't exactly in a rush to return to Underwood's hellhole of a world, but he did have Campfire work to do.

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Yeah. I guess," Jamie said jamming his hands in the pockets of his trenchcoat. "Maybe tomorrow, I'll hit the school and talk to the principal or one of the deans to get some idea of what's going on."

Because Zoe and Anakin would just LOVE to see Jamie again.

[veryhighq.livejournal.com]

"And maybe from here I'll be able to get in touch with people back home," Johnny said. "Last I knew, we didn't have the ability to go to specific Earths or anything, but I've been in Fandom for-freaking-ever. So who knows?"

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, maybe I'll try Strange again and if all else fails I can call Layla-"

Jamie frowned and pulled out another sock puppet from his trenchcoat.

"Where the heck are these coming from?"