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Demon Marcus, Sunday

Sparkle was at work today fully intending to take full advantage of his employee discount. Today was his last day of freedom before that drama camp thing that Dr. Lecter had dared him to sign up for, and, while he was already packed, a lot of long and hard thinking had him second-guessing if maybe he should be dressing as though he actually gave a damn, too.

This was how anxious he was about this stupid summer camp thing. He was second-guessing his wardrobe.

And sure, there was also the fact that this was his last chance to actually earn any spending money before spending the next couple of months in DC, and he still needed to figure out what to do with Velcro in the meantime, and everything was so up in the air, most of his time at work was spent bouncing from one rack to the next, never actually finishing what he was doing at any of them.

Sparkle was just a touch scattered today, yes.

[Open!]

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"Entertain me," Cade demanded, slouching against the door.

Ah, Cade. Just the distraction that Sparkle needed.

"Juggling act or striptease?"

He liked to present options, here.

"Juggle the clothes after you take 'em off," Cade decided.

"... I could probably manage that," Sparkle decided, reaching for the bottom of his shirt. "I mean, might have to tie them in knots so they don't just like flop around, but..."

Really, Sparkle?

Cade burst out laughing. "You're that easy today, huh?"

Sparkle shot a grin right back, shrugging his shoulders as he smoothed his shirt back down.

"What can I say? I do stupid shit when I'm freaking out over... stupid shit." This was true. "Dr. Lecter put me up to this drama camp thing, and that starts pretty much right away, and it's not a big deal or anything, but I'm still losing my shit over it."

Because it was, in fact, 'a big deal or anything.'

"So you're leaving too?"

Cade sounded less okay with that than he'd been aiming for.

Sparkle gave his toe a scuff against the floor.

"Ish? Just for a little while." A beat. "But you're graduated, aren't you? Shit, you'll be gone by fall."

Well. This actually kind of sucked. Sparkle was wearing the 'this is not okay' face that Cade had been striving to avoid.

"Yeah," Cade said, running his hand through his hair. "You suck."

He didn't mean that.

"Yeah," Sparkle sighed, taking a few steps back and then hopping up to sit on the counter. "But so do you."

He really didn't mean that, either.

"DC isn't all that far, though. And Doc Lecter is putting me up in my own apartment until I'm done there. You could visit. We could see what the booze is like in DC. Make a bunch of stupid decisions..."

Yes. This was probably precisely why Hannbal had arranged for you to have a place to stay there, Sparks.

"There's a zoo!"

"We could get you another pet!"

What an excellent choice, Cade!

But it was a quick and easy picker-upper!

"Just so long as it's not something that Velcro will eat," Sparkle decided, and then pondered that for a moment. "There's a giant panda cub and they have baby cheetahs."

Not that he'd been looking at the website for any specific reason at all, really.

"Oooh, cute and deadly," Cade said. "Maybe I'll get one too. Ben's birthday's in a month. He'd love it."

He wouldn't.

"Who wouldn't love a cheetah, right? And they're fast. And built more like dogs than cats, did you know that? Their claws don't even retract like a cat's, they're out all the time."

Sparkle was definitely a cat person.

"Oooooh, so they can totally destroy furniture too!"

Not an upside, Cade.

"Right!"

Depended on who the furniture belonged to.

"And, I mean, nobody's going to fuck around with somebody taking their cheetah for a walk."

"So true," Cade agreed. "They leave that guy alone. I mean, I was a nexu for most of a week and everyone left me alone."

"Yeah, see, and when I get changed into an animal, I get turned into one of those really stubby dogs that the Queen of England is so damn fond of. Like, where do I go to sign up to turn into a big kickass cat that nobody sane is going to make trouble for, huh?"

Not happening, Sparkle. The angry goth-punk corgi was hilarious.

"I don't know," Cade said. "Ben turned into a tiny ginger kitten and Ender was a lizard. It's karking weird."

"So how did you score the kickass animal transformation, huh?"

By being kickass, presumably?

"Because I'm kickass," Cade said, grinning in a very catlike way. "Obviously."

Of course this meant that, though he was laughing, Sparkle had to grab and throw the nearest thing to him at Cade.

It was a package of socks. All fear.

Cade batted them away. "Very karking mature," scolded the man with the "let's steal some cheetahs" plan.

"Hey, I never claimed to be mature," Sparkle cackled. "I am exactly as advertised, man. A punk-ass high school kid who had absolutely nothing good on his student record until he came to this place, which is too messed up to realize just how messed up I am. Mature is for other people. Probably the mature ones."

It seemed like sound logic to Sparks, anyway.

"Sitting around going to bed on time and not having astral pets," Cade said, shaking his head sadly. "Losers."

"They don't even know what they're missing out on," Sparkle said, clicking his tongue. "Poor bastards."

"I feel sorry for them," Cade said, nodding so-sadly.

"But it means more cheetahs for us," Sparkle noted, always reaching for that upside. "So, you know, I can't be too upset for them."

"A cheetah in every pot!" Cade said brightly, then frowned. "Wait, that's not right."

"They'd have to be some pretty big pots," Sparkle noted. "And I'm sure cheetah meat is pretty tough, anyway. You'd have to stew the shit out of those things."

Sparkle was now overthinking this.

"Yeah, it's all muscle," Cade agreed, also overthinking it. "Does anything eat a cheetah?"

"I dunno," Sparkle admitted. "I'm pretty sure they're at the top of their food chain. But if they're already dead, like, probably vultures or hyenas or something?"

They'd be too fast to just chase down for dinner, though they didn't have much stamina...

Now Sparkle had to ponder this.

Cade tilted his head. "Probably," he agreed. "Would lions eat 'em?"

"If they can catch 'em, I guess," Sparkle mused. "Or, like, maybe they'd just eat the cubs, since they're little and way easier to catch."

"Not as stringy either, probably."

Thank you, Cade.

"Cheetah veal," Sparkle mused. "For the record, we are not going to be eating our cheetahs, though."

"Good call," Cade said. "We're gonna work hard for our cheetahs. They'll be so much better than the karking monkeys Atton and I tried for."

"For starters, they don't throw their shit."

Sparkle was going to count this as an instant upside. Good job leaping that low bar, cheetahs.

"So, so, SO gross and unnecessary," Cade said, shuddering.

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Demon Marcus, Sunday

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