The Perk [Saturday morning]

[begmetwice.livejournal.com]

It wasn't as though Irene could say she hadn't been warned.

Don't ask how or why she had men's clothes in her apartment; when she'd gone digging through her wardrobe for something that might fit this morning, she'd stumbled across a hooded sweatshirt (ugh) and a pair of Dockers (she felt faint) at the very bottom of her closet.

Bastard thought he was funny, apparently. But it'd work for now, since she clearly had to make a trip to the mainland to buy something more suitable if she was going to be stuck this way for longer than an hour or so. That was more than enough time to spend in clothing that probably came from...JC Penney. Or worse.

There were perks to this, though. One of the baristas was giving her interesting looks where before he hadn't (hm), and while Irene much preferred her usual, more...compact form, she wasn't as deeply traumatized as one might have suspected. After all, she'd probably change back soon enough (that was the rumor she'd heard), and as soon as she got her feet into some Cole Haans and something with a proper threadcount on her body, she'd feel much better about the whole thing.

But first: coffee. She got something enormous (and they insisted upon putting pumpkin in it, by the smell of it) and tucked away into a corner with a newspaper. She couldn't very well go shopping uncaffeinated, after all. That way laid fashion disaster.

[open with SP but I couldn't not put her out somewhere omg.]

Comments

[fracknotfrak.livejournal.com]

Vic was not having a good morning. For obvious reasons.

Luckily she had found an old pair of jeans that used to be her Ex's. They were a bit loose but it was better than nothing. And luckily she still had her old Flyers jersey which she normally would have been swimming in.

But now the Barista had pushed her over the edge.

"Look! I just want a plain large fucking cup of coffee," she said sternly. "If I catch a whiff of pumpkin spice I'm going to be seriously pissed. I already woke up with extra parts this morning. I don't need anything extra. Seriously. Any pumpkin? I'll throw you in jail. Not kidding."

[begmetwice.livejournal.com]

"If you convince them," Irene called, unable to resist, "can you see if they'll give me normal coffee, too?" She shook her cup ruefully. "I don't see what you lot do in this country with your pumpkin bloody spice, but it does not go with coffee."

Perhaps she should've opted for tea, instead.

[fracknotfrak.livejournal.com]

Vic glanced over at the guy in corner and glared at the Barista. "Make that two plain coffees."

She turned to Irene and shook her head. "What is it with pumpkin spice anyway?"

Eliot must be rubbing off on her.

[begmetwice.livejournal.com]

"I have no idea. When do they cut it out? 'Round Christmas?" Irene wondered. "I'd think pumpkin-y things might last all the way up to whenever Thanksgiving is."

She clearly had no idea. Novemberish?

"You're not usually a man either, right? Did I hear correctly?"

[fracknotfrak.livejournal.com]

"Yeeeeah," Vic grumbled as she picked up the coffee and brought one of them over to Irene. "Apparently most of the women on the island are affected. The police station is getting a ton of phone calls about it. I'm just happy it's my day off."

[begmetwice.livejournal.com]

"Oh, you must be the lady detective I've heard so much about!" Irene said, using her context clues like the very clever girl she normally was. She took the coffee gratefully, offering her free hand to shake. "Irene Adler. I own and run Dite's? And normally don't look like this."

At all.

[sorry for the extreeeeeeme SP!]

[fracknotfrak.livejournal.com]

"Well, deputy now. Before that I was a homicide detective in Philly," she said shaking Irene's hand. "Vic Moretti. Dite's is that.... Ah, specialty shop in town. Don't you also teach the sex ed class at school?"

[Sorry for all the edits!]

[begmetwice.livejournal.com]

"Sure do," Irene said happily. "I was working with some private detectives in London before I came here, so when someone mentioned you in the context of your occupation, that's what caught my interest."

Oh, that was some creative revisionist history, Irene.

"Did anyone warn you about this, Deputy?" she asked, gesturing to herself broadly. "The...whole thing with this weekend?"

[fracknotfrak.livejournal.com]

"You mean the whole wake up with a penis thing?" Vic said with her trademark cheerfulness and sarcasm mixed in with her usual bluntness. "Noooooope! Not one bit. Funny how that works."

She took a gulp of her coffee and was happy to see the barista had caught a clue. "What kind of work were you doing with PI's?"

[begmetwice.livejournal.com]

"I got a heads up, at least," Irene noted with a wince of sympathy. "And I helped them find some incriminating information on the royal family."

If one took 'helped them' to mean 'completely blocked their every attempt.'

[fracknotfrak.livejournal.com]

"Sounds pretty high profile," Vic mused as she leaned back in her chair. And Vic wondered briefly what that incriminating information was given Irene's current line of work.

Then again the royal family was always a randy bunch.

"As for our current predicament I doubt a heads up would have helped with the trauma. At least I'll know what size of clothes to get if this happens again."