fandomtownies | Demon Marcus, Sunday

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Demon Marcus, Sunday

Well, it wasn't going to be below freezing or anything today, but Sparkle figured he probably ought to make it a little easier for kids to go outside in this weather all the same. After all, he was prone to just giving away winter gear to people who seemed dazed and confused enough, and he had kind of kicked himself this morning for not thinking about doing this sooner, given that the weekend was very nearly over now.

Still, Sparkle had gone running around the shop, gathering up hats, scarves, mittens, earmuffs... any warm clothing that he could find for little children, which he was then putting into a big bin, which, in turn, he was putting out in front of the shop with a 'free' sign on it, written in English, French, Spanish, and Aurebesh. So, pretty much every language he knew, or knew some kid knew and could Google so he'd get it right.

And then he sat himself behind the counter and busied himself with painting his nails. Black with hot pink stripes, today, mostly just because he felt like it. All the little kids were great, and he kind of adored any weekend where he got to see a million of them running around and having fun, but he wasn't looking forward to Monday.

[OOC: Open!]

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Oh, Kaidan. Sparkle winced a little.

"Pollen," he supplied. "A whole week of just... shitty pollen that makes everyone uncomfortable. Only way to be rid of it is to get away from it, so maybe keep Portalocity on speed-dial for that one, if you would rather not."

Kaidan winced a little in return. "Yup," he confirmed, "I'm through a portal for that one. Watch me nope. I'm already having moral conflicts about the wacky weekends vis a vis consent, I do not need a week of looming non-con hormones on top of that."

Sparkle nodded and sighed.

"I mean, at least we're all in our right minds for that, even if there aren't enough cold showers in the world. The lucky ones have somewhere to go. Or, like, don't need to breathe, I guess."

He could live with not breathing for a week, honest.

"Still. I think I'll be happier hanging out in a bar on Omega," Kaidan said with a lopsided smile. "Though it's tempting to throw up Barrier for a week and run around with a giant spray bottle of ice water or something."

"I think some teachers do bring the spray bottle to class," Sparkle mused. "Probably mostly joking, but..."

He shrugged, smiling crookedly.

"I'd bail too, if that was an option."

Kaidan tilted his head, "Why isn't it? You could go visit your kids."

"Well, the kids weren't always an option, I mean," Sparkle replied, shrugging. "Though now that they are, maybe that's exactly what I'll do."

Kaidan shrugged in return, "If not, you're always welcome to come hang out on Omega with me. I'll be the guy camped out in a booth at the bar talking shit with the Turians for a week."

"Oooh, I can shit-talk with the best of them!"

He really could.

"Turians are made mostly of chitin and sarcasm," Kaidan said, grinning a little, "You'd probably have fun."

"See, now I just want to snark at one now," Sparkle laughed. "Well, maybe not right now. Gotta shove toques at tinies, right now."

"Someday, you're going to meet Garrus and you will either hate each other or meld into one being," Kaidan proclaimed, "Which you might not like, because of that whole chitin thing."

"That depends," Sparkle decreed. "By his people's standards, on like a scale of one to ten, is Garrus hot?"

Priorities.

"Garrus is one of the most respected Turians in the galaxy, a galactic hero, the best damned sniper I've ever met," Kaidan began, and then grinned, "Going by Turian standards, he's a 10, because they care about military reputation more than looks."

He fired up his Omni and called up a photo of Garrus and Tali. "And Tali's why the Turian females gnash their mandibles. Garrus is smitten and only has eyes for her."

"Oh god they're adorable together, though," Sparkle decreed. "See, I can't possibly become one with this Garrus guy. I'd hate to break up a pair."

Sorry, Tali. He could not date you.

"Eh, you could timeshare," Kaidan grinned, "Might be good for him. Broaden his horizons."

Garrus was so straight. It was a little sad, but also Kaidan was secretly grateful for this because Garrus and Shepard had been inseparable.

"Oh, I'm sure he'll love Leto and Hernando," Sparkle snorted. "I mean, I know I'm probably already dreaming when I think to myself, 'hmm, threesome,' but this way I'd need to re-adjust again right along to 'orgy.'"

These were the places Sparkle conversations sometimes liked to meander. Sorry, Kaidan.

"OOooooooooversharing," Kaidan laughed, "Penalty on the play, that was a direct violation of the no-oversharing rule! You'd have to talk to Hernando about any of that."

Another chuckle. "I don't know what he'd make of Hernando. Hernando's quiet and nice and not generally made of snark. Garrus wouldn't know how to even talk to him."

But imagining the giant space chicken trying was giving Kaidan a moment of amusement.

"Hernando and I are still discussing the rules we're setting on third-date stuff," Sparkle teased. Because he was terrible and of course they had talked about that on date two. "Threesomes are at least a fourth date thing."

Not really.

"Garrus doesn't handle the squishy ones well, huh?"

"Augh," Kaidan laughed, "He already got me with that whole third-date thing. I didn't even know that was a thing! I don't think it's a thing where I'm from."

Yes it was. Kaidan was just poorly socialized.

"And not so much with the handling of the squishies, no," Kaidan shook his head, "He can dial back the deliberate snark but his tone of voice is just sarcasm all the way. He can't help it, it's just kind of how Turians sound." A beat, "And they usually are being sarcastic, so there's that."

"It's a thing everywhere," Sparkle said, this fact based on absolutely no evidence at all. "Science fact."

Which immediately made it true.

"And see," he added, "now I double want to meet him."

Kaidan eyed him dubiously. "I think I'm going to avoid talking to Hernando for awhile after you two have a third date, then."

He paused. "Er. You do want to go on another date with him, right? Or did I just make that super awkward?"

Kaidan Alenko: master of social graces.

He changed the subject back to Garrus. "You probably will. It's only a matter of time until he looks me up for an ass kicking."

"Oh yeah, you broke my heart just now," Sparkle laughed. "Nah. We were talking about date three maybe two steps in the door for date two. It's fine."

He smirked a bit.

"I look forward to the ass-kicking, then."

"You would," Kaidan said with a dramatic eyeroll, but he was smiling. It wasn't clear which topic he was referring to or whether he had chosen one since the comment kind of worked for both.

"I'm glad you two are getting along so well. He's giddy and it's pretty adorable."

Kaidan, it's not nice to tattle like that.

Kaidan, however, didn't care.

"Giddy?"

See Sparkle, see Sparkle smile crookedly and maaaaybe a little stupidly-hopefully, there.

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