fandomtownies | Trooper Station; Monday [06/03].

One good things about having Arlo 2 around was that it usually gave Rosa a head's-up if anything was going on around the island that was pet or animal related. Sometimes. She'd mostly been untouched through the last few bouts, but when Rosa woke up and got treated to the most adorably annoying ramble of God-even-knows-what sort of puppy babble about delicious shoes and chasing cats and there was a bird on the balcony earlier and she talked to it and asked it nicely if she could eat it, but the bird said no, because the bird didn't want to be eaten, and that was okay, she guessed, because if she was a bird, she probably wouldn't want to get eaten either and hey, was she going to the station today? If she was going to the station today, could she go, too, especially since it wasn't all gross and icky outside anymore, can she, huh, can she, can she?

She definitely could not.

Rosa had never been more eager to get to work as she had that morning, but then she realized that it was pretty much an out of the frying pan, into the fire situation, what with all the calls from people who seemed to forget where they lived, as usual.

Most of those people were the bee lady, who seemed to be calling at every turn of phrase her precious stupid bees turned at her, and Rosa tried to be patient in explaining that, no, she wasn't going to arrest any of the bees for saying mean things to her, being an asshole was not a crime, and of course they were going to gossip, they're bees, buzzing about stuff was just what they did, and what do you expect from a queen bee? She's the queen, of course she's going to pretty much expect you to be servile, and, again, being an asshole is not a crime.

By about the sixth call, Rosa had had enough and just simply said, "Well, if you can't handle it, maybe you should just not have bees."

Two seconds after she hung up from that call, the phone on Ralph's desk rang to life. He answered it, listened, and sighed. "No, I cannot arrest Detective Diaz for being mean to you. Being an asshole is not a crime."

And that made Rosa blink a little with an idea, forgoing the phones for a moment to pull up a document on her computer and started to type almost furiously. "What's that all about, Diaz?" Calvin asked.

"New proposal for Kincaid," she said, "to make 'Being an Asshole is Not a Crime' the official FPD motto."

They could save so much time by just being able to point to it on their badges whenever it needed to be said.

[[ oooopeeeeen! ]]

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Miguel had no pets, so he hadn't actually noticed anything weird yet this morning. He was just bringing a decent meal and pot of coffee to Rosa now that he could.

"Coffee!" He led with the important things.

Rosa's head all but snapped up from where she was checking out the phone on her desk, pretty sure she'd actually managed to break it this time around when, mere moments ago, she had slammed it down several times as if that would get a point across better.

"Please tell me you also brought a bottle of aspirin," she said. "And a bottle of whiskey. And Xanax..."

And then the phone rang again, and the only thing saving that phone from being thrown against the wall was the fact that Tightpants had come in. So he'd managed to save two lives that day. Good on him.

"Noooo, but I come bearing empanadas." Hey, after a week of crap, he was starting with a classic. "I can get the aspirin or the whiskey, though," he said. "Should I go out and come back?"

The fact that he'd even offer to go get her whiskey while she was working was honestly kind of touching, really.

"No, it's fine," Rosa even let a little bit of that grin out, too, just a little, as she rolled way from her desk enough to hook a boot around a nearby chair and kicked it out for Tightpants to come join her. "Empanadas first. I'm starving."

Hey, Miguel wasn't going to judge, particularly on Fandom.

He plopped down in the seat she'd gotten for him and handed over the bag of food. "It's a 'thank god we have real food again' celebration," he explained. "I'll probably cook a lot this week."

"Oh, what?" asked Rosa, taking the bag gratefully and rifling through it to extract said food and shoving a bunch of clearly not very important files out of the way on her desk to make room. "You mean you didn't like living off of canned food with questionably old expiration dates and playing botulism roulette?

"If you need help taking care of leftovers," she added, though she felt it was probably unnecessary, "you know where to find me."

And maybe it was the long, long, loooooong ass couple of weeks she'd had, and the long, long, looooooong week she knew she had ahead of her, or maybe it was just the fact that they hadn't really had a lot of time to spend together lately, or it could have just been the fact that she now had an empanada in her hand that he had brought to her and that was just really nice, but she rolled over a little closer to lean in and give Tightpants a kiss.

One that would not be further acknowledge or talked about, especially since once it was over, there was now food being put right in her face. There. Arbitrary PDA quota for the month fulfiled, and it was only the third!

Hey, Miguel was impressed! And grinning just a little before he answered. "Hey, just because I can live off it, doesn't mean I want to. Actual food's a definite plus.

"I might even take requests for the sorts of leftovers I'll have. I make a mean corned beef, too."

"Anything you make is always amazing," Rosa pointed out, "though I would definitely prefer anything with meat that can be easily indentified as 'normal.'"

"So, salad?" Miguel asked, grinning.

"I'll take salad, too," Rosa shrugged. "Just as long as there's no soup."

She wasn't even going to try to hold back a sneer at soup.

"Right; no soup, nothing pureed," Miguel promised. "Salad and corned beef, maybe some tacos...I'm sure I can come up with a few identifiable meals."

"A few," Rosa agreed, nodding with a rare vote of confidence, before taking another bite.

"So...what's the occasion for this one?"

She didn't forget, like, some anniversary or something did she? Crap...

Like Miguel would ever remember one?

He shrugged. "Like I said - just glad to have food back again. Last week sucked."

"It wasn't so bad at first," Rosa admitted with a shrug. "Definitely had too much fun sniping things from my balcony. But that shit got old real fast."

Miguel laughed. "Yeah, I'm not so much a gun person, so I missed that. I didn't mind the deadly outside as much as the rotted inside, though. I'm spoiled enough to want a bed without rust and unexpired food."

Rosa shook her head, as if incredibly disappointed. "I had no idea," she said, "you were so high-maintenence."

While eating more of the food that he just up and brought her simply because he was awesome.

"I," Miguel declared, "am accustomed to only the best. FLoors you don't fall through and ceilings that don't leak!"

Trooper Station; Monday [06/03].

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