Devil's Nest - Wednesday

[biotic_psychotic]

Jack rocked on into work wearing a green tree boa around her shoulders - and promptly stopped and stared. The DJ was playing a punk cover of Margaritaville. It.. wasn't completely awful? She shot Tiny a look. Tiny shrugged and threw her the keys and off she went to do inventory. Tucked it into the register and leaned on the bar. "He has more songs than this, right?" she muttered out of the corner of her mouth. Tiny shrugged.

It was going to be a long night if he didn't.

[Devil's Nest is Open! OCD is up!]

Comments

At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

Talk to Jack, try to harass Tiny, mod your fun if you want. Tiny is very vigilant about IDs and underagers will be served sodas only.

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

Fjord wasn't underage!

Fjord was, in fact, inconveniently a snake today, content to rest comfortably on Jack's shoulders. They were warm, and Fjord was a snake of few needs, really. Though the music for the night was throwing up some weird-ass vibrations that got his little snakey senses somewhat confused, and so he was looking up, after a few minutes, and attempting to puzzle out what the hell it was they were listening to, here.

Life was confusing for an emerald tree boa, apparently.

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

The boa was not getting offered adult beverages. He wouldn't drink coffee, she wasn't gonna waste booze trying. Jack was occasionally reaching up to boop him gently on top of his head, though, because that's what one does while one is wearing a snake.

The music was confusing even if you were human-shaped.

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

Fjord even put up with those boops with a sense of dignity and poise.

Which was, after a few of those, he was trying to see how much ground a snake could cover when he wasn't really trying to get anywhere but still felt it was important to move. Fjord was now more or less slithering a casual few laps around Jack's shoulders. Adjusting. Not that any one position was exactly uncomfortable when you were a limbless tube.

Look, life without thumbs was not exactly full of excitement. He entertained himself however he could.

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

She squirmed when he slid along the nape of her neck and reached to poke him down a little. Jack was definitely not used to having anything tickle. She held an arm up and out in case he wanted to become a bracelet instead of a necklace.

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

And hey, that mixed things up a little bit, too! And so off Fjord went, making his merry way down toward Jack's hand, kind of wrapping his way along her arm as he went.

Which made it real fuckin' awkward a few moments later, when he was no longer a snake, naked as a jaybird and falling backwards to the floor, what with the way he was clinging for dear life as he went.

"SHIT."

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

It wasn't the first time a naked man had grabbed her and pulled her atop him, but it might be the first time it had happened unexpectedly. Jack blurted an entirely different swearword and windmilled for a second before gravity betrayed her and down she went. "FJORD!"

Enough swearing to blister the paint happened and Jack struggled into a sitting position, stripping off the t-shirt she had on over her tank and handing it to him, as if something that would fit her would even go over his head. It was an impromptu modesty drape until she could get to the clean bar towels.

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

And drape it Fjord was going to do, holding it in front of himself as he sat, bare-assed and dazed, on the floor.

Jack was not the only one swearing up a blue streak, if that "Shit, fuck, balls, ass," litany coming from Fjord's mouth was any indication.

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

Jack dusted herself off and stood. Considered her options and then went and got one of the large black trash bags. "This is going to look stupid as hell but it'll get you home without getting ogled to death," she said, popping some holes for his head and arms in it. That handed over, she grabbed some of the clean bar towels and regarded them thoughtfully. "I have no idea how to tie any sort of loincloth underwear thing, do you? This might work."

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

"That ain't something I ever had a reason to learn how to do before," Fjord muttered, taking the bag and pulling it over his head.

... Hell, this was definitely A Look, wasn't it.

"Don't suppose you got any more of these sacks?"

He could just be a large green disaster man decked out in plastic from top to bottom.

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

"Fuck if I know the shit you learn on a ship," Jack said with a shrug. "We got a whole roll of 'em." So she was nice and got him another, handing it over. "What are you gonna do, put two more holes in it and use it as trousers?"

.. Not the worst idea in the world.

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

"Either that or one more big hole an' wear it like a robe around my bottom half," Fjord muttered. It wasn't really much of a stretch from what he usually wore, anyway. Hell, his usual was something of a loincloth situation, anyway.

Over his pants.

He missed his pants.

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

Jack shrugged, "Couldn't look stranger than half the shit people regularly wear around this place. I doubt anyone'd look twice." She tilted her head, "You okay? That was a hell of a fall, Fjord."

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

"Bruised my pride, mostly," Fjord admitted. And then grimaced as he plucked a hole in the second bag with his nails. "An' probably my fuckin' tailbone while I was at it. This island, swear to the gods it's out to get me."

It would probably sound more like he paranoid ramblings of an unsound mind if not for the fact that he was sitting there wearing garbage bags because he'd been a snake a minute before.

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

"It's out to get everyone," Jack said, "So you're in good company at least. Could be worse, buddy. Could've popped back from snakesville and startled a gremlin."

She grabbed the whiskey and poured him a double, because he looked like he needed it.

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

"... And there's my horrifyin' thought for the day," Fjord said slowly as he watched her pour the double. "So thanks for that."

At least this way if he was bitten by a gremlin on the way home, he'd be clothed.

Ish.

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

"You're welcome," Jack smirked, handing him the whiskey, "Drink up, fortify yourself. Be thankful people-turning-back-from-animals is so common that nobody blinks or ogles much."

Another grin, "You're a pretty snake, buddy."

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

Fjord gave a faintly amused snort before replying, "You ever see an ugly one, though?"

Snakes were, by and large, pretty okay. Probably.

Fjord wasn't much of an animal person. Fjord also had no idea what to do with a compliment, nine times out of ten.

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

"Sand boas are pretty fuckin' ugly," Jack replied, "It's all subjective. Clearly they're attractive to one another or there wouldn't be any of 'em. Their scales are nice, it's just their faces that are fucked up."

She liked snakes. Especially the venomous ones.

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

"I suppose here's where I admit I don't see many snakes out at sea, hm?"

... Well. There was one that really counted...

Re: At the bar.

[biotic_psychotic]

"Are there snakes out at sea?" Jack asked curiously, "I know some constrictors like their swamps and rivers but I hadn't heard of salt water snakes. That'd be a thing, wouldn't it?"

Re: At the bar.

[built_fjord_tough]

"Sea snakes? Yeah, they're a thing," Fjord replied, shrugging and then pausing to knock back his drink. "Mostly tropical coastal water things, though. Ain't really an 'out to sea' sort of animal. Then again, I dunno what the hell they do on Earth, I could just be feedin' you shit."

Throw some axes!

[biotic_psychotic]

Axe throwing range! Close-toed shoes required, no drinking while throwing, no throwing axes outside the range.

Back office.

[biotic_psychotic]

In case Eric's here. He might be. He might not be. You'll never know unless you look. Jack wouldn't recommend it but she also wouldn't stop you from trying.

OOC

[biotic_psychotic]

razzafrazzaearworms..