texted3times: (x why am i a girl)
Eric Northman ([personal profile] texted3times) wrote in [community profile] fandomtownies2019-10-10 12:33 pm
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Devil's Nest, Thursday Night, October 10, 2019

Breasts were awesome. Eric: huge fan.

On people who were NOT HIM. Or Tiny. No offense, Tiny. Eric's looked awesome, of course, in a low-cut red halter top he had around because never you mind. He could work it, but it didn't mean he liked to.

"I swear to Christ, if you put up some basic bitch special for white wine spritzers, I will eat you," he hissed at the bartender before stomping off in a pair of four inch bright red stilettos. He'd woken up short and that was unacceptable. He whirled to wag a finger at the DJ. "And if you stare that blatantly at my ass again they will never find all of the pieces of what's left of you."

The Devil's Nest was open and so, so cranky.

[OOC: Living life OCD free today!]
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my_own_advocate: (Default)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-11 12:42 pm (UTC)(link)
"Did someone say wine spritzers?" Lucifer called, stepping into the club. "Honestly."
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-11 01:36 pm (UTC)(link)
"No one said wine spritzer," Eric huffed. "Wine spritzers should be blasted from the fucking earth."
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - easy grin)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-11 04:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Lucifer turned to look at him, and... squinted. "Well, if it's not the frown I'd recognize anywhere," he said merrily. "Eric. You seem to be having the time of your life."
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-11 05:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Eric shot him a look that could've fried lead. "Why didn't you shift too?"
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - really now?)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-11 06:32 pm (UTC)(link)
"Me? I'm an angel," Lucifer sighed, like it was perfectly obvious. "Why mess with perfection?"
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-11 06:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Eric rolled his eyes hard. "You're hardly perfect."
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - cat ate a canary)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-11 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
"Eric, Eric, Eric--a?" Lucifer said. "We both know you're lying. Tiny? My usual, please."
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-11 06:53 pm (UTC)(link)
"Eric is fine," Eric said. "This is just temporary."
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - really now?)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-12 08:57 am (UTC)(link)
"No urge to lean into it?" Lucifer said. "You know, go out and do all of those girly things your manly machismo doesn't allow you to enjoy otherwise?"
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-12 04:04 pm (UTC)(link)
"I own a hot pink spandex jumpsuit," Eric said. "I contain multitudes."
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - easy grin)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-12 05:39 pm (UTC)(link)
"And I haven't seen it yet?" Lucifer sighed.
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-12 07:39 pm (UTC)(link)
"You hadn't asked," Eric said, grinning back.
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - cat ate a canary)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-13 04:53 am (UTC)(link)
"Well, how could I know there was anything to ask?" Lucifer said grandly. "Honestly, the people on this island. You find yourself with breasts for a few days, and what do you choose to do? A spa day! I could have a spa day any day."

Tiny pressed a scotch into his hand. "Thank you, Tiny."
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-13 08:39 pm (UTC)(link)
"Do they not know that men can go to spas?" Eric asked, rolling his eyes. "Swedish massage--not just for lady bits."
Edited 2019-10-13 20:42 (UTC)
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - really now?)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-14 05:15 am (UTC)(link)
"I don't know, but I want to take a newspaper and find whoever was going on that 'lady's day out' and smack them for making it harder on men everywhere to do whatever they want," Lucifer said, shaking his head.

He took a sip from his scotch. "So you're going to remain all scowly, I presume."
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-14 07:46 pm (UTC)(link)
"Probably," Eric said, stealing a sip from Lucifer's glass even though he didn't really like scotch.
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - errr)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-15 04:56 am (UTC)(link)
"Did you honestly just steal my drink?" Lucifer said, squinting at him. "You do know you own the place, right?"
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-15 02:53 pm (UTC)(link)
"Of course I know that," Eric said. "I just choose to be petty and vindictive."
my_own_advocate: (Default)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-17 05:05 pm (UTC)(link)
"You know that's just sad," said Lucifer, who could definitely be petty and vindictive but just never thought about it too hard.
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-17 06:54 pm (UTC)(link)
"Maybe, but I also don't care," Eric said.
Edited 2019-10-17 19:07 (UTC)
my_own_advocate: (Default)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-18 07:20 am (UTC)(link)
"Yes, I can tell," said Lucifer, sarcastically.
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-18 01:49 pm (UTC)(link)
"You don't need to come here just because the place is named for you and Tiny keeps comping you the expensive scotch," Eric said, slowing down as he listened to himself, "--and you've changed the playlists and gotten me to add a piano...Shit."

Lucifer totally helped run the place now. Son of a bitch.
Edited 2019-10-18 13:49 (UTC)
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - cat ate a canary)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-19 04:50 pm (UTC)(link)
"I'm just trying to look after our club," Lucifer said, patronizingly, and patted Eric on the shoulder.
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-19 06:32 pm (UTC)(link)
"I hate you so much."

That wasn't true.

"And you don't get to see my new boobs, which are amazing."

They were amazing, but Lucifer would also get to see them.
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - cat ate a canary)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-19 07:30 pm (UTC)(link)
"But then how can I know that they're amazing?" Lucifer said. "Sounds like a bit of an ego problem, if you ask me."
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-19 07:37 pm (UTC)(link)
"I've seen a lot of breasts," Eric bragged. "So I know a good set when I see them."
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - easy grin)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-20 05:15 am (UTC)(link)
"That doesn't actually prove anything," Lucifer pointed out, "But I'm willing to take a few hours out of my schedule to do some personal judging."
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-20 07:27 pm (UTC)(link)
"As a personal favor to me," Eric said dryly.
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - intent)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-21 04:59 pm (UTC)(link)
"I mean, there are plenty of other judges, I'm sure, but none of them are me," Lucifer said, spreading his arms as if to say: look how fantastic I am.
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-21 05:58 pm (UTC)(link)
"You're just banking on me not asking Tiny," Eric said.
my_own_advocate: (lucifer - cat ate a canary)

[personal profile] my_own_advocate 2019-10-23 03:29 am (UTC)(link)
"Tiny? Honestly?" Lucifer said, his eyebrows shooting up. "My, you are desperate."

He shot Tiny a glance with a wide grin. "A dig at him, not at you," he assured him.
texted3times: (x why am i a girl)

[personal profile] texted3times 2019-10-23 06:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Tiny was definitely smirking at that.

Eric rolled his eyes. "I'm not desperate."
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