The Perk, Monday morning

[betterthanaplan]

That soothing music was really getting on Duke's nerves.

It was inescapable, though. Much like the piles of sea shells and corals he had crammed into his pockets, alongside a wide variety of tools (a ladder? Seriously??), a hell of a lot of coconuts, and a whale shark he'd managed to catch while fishing this morning.

And a little pouch of gold coins where his wallet used to be. He set one of the coins down on the counter at the Perk. "Please tell me you'll take this in exchange for a very large, very caffeinated beverage."

They would. Purple pants barista also offered him a fringed skirt, just because they were friends.

[open!]

Comments

[fh_animalcrossing]

A little blue cat walked in, talked to the barista and got a drink, and then kind of stood around.

He really probably should not have caffeine?

[betterthanaplan]

That . . . was definitely a thing that was happening, yes. Anywhere but Fandom, Duke would be checking his drink to see if it had been tampered with.

Instead he just went ahead and had another sip of it.

"New around here?"

[fh_animalcrossing]

Moe nodded. "I have a campsite by the woods! I like it 'cause it's where so many bugs live!"

[betterthanaplan]

"Then you picked a good spot," Duke said. "I live on a ship in port. I like it because it's where so many fish live."

To, you know, oversimplify the situation a lot. Which seemed appropriate, when talking to a blue cat.

[fh_animalcrossing]

"I knew you'd get it! I don't know how I knew, but I knew!" Moe said happily. "I'm Moe. I'm thinking this island might be a good place to stay for a while."

[betterthanaplan]

"I'm Duke. And I think you'd fit right in."

And probably end up taking one of his classes and yelling about having to, like, get wet or something.

"Welcome, man."

[fh_animalcrossing]

"Thanks! I wanna be friends with everybody on the island. So I wanna learn everything about everyone! So... what do I wanna know first... Hmmm..." Moe said, thoughtfully. "What's your hobby? Ya know, what's a thing you really enjoy doing?"

[betterthanaplan]

Interesting small talk style, Moe.

"Oh, you know. Fishing. Cooking. Yoga. The basics."

[fh_animalcrossing]

"Woah, the basics? I've never tried that! It sounds amazing."

He was serious.

[betterthanaplan]

"Um," Duke said. "Yeah, you should totally do that."

He had no idea what this cat would end up doing. But he was hoping it was ridiculous.

[fh_animalcrossing]

"I can't wait to tell the bugs I have a new hobby! They'll be so happy for me," Moe said gleefully.

[betterthanaplan]

"They totally will," Duke agreed with the ease of a man now used to having conversations that made very little sense to him. "Which bugs are your favorites?"

[fh_animalcrossing]

"The floor bugs," Moe said with a nod. "The ones on the walls are being jerks."

[hatesparadise]

Danny did the reasonable thing and waited for the talking cat (that wasn't the fake Mayor) to vacate the coffee shop before going in.

"Survived Saturday, I see."

[betterthanaplan]

"As did you. You and your SEAL have any . . . heart to hearts?"

Look, he shipped it, okay? He just wanted to see Danny happy. Even if Steve was several kinds of an ass.

[hatesparadise]

Danny shot him a warning look at that.

"Look." He rubbed his forehead because that was a stress migraine just waiting to happen. "I get that you want to help. I really do."

[betterthanaplan]

Duke raised his hands. "Hey, man, if you're comfy where you are, far be it for me to push anything."

Yet. He still had that idea to lock the two of them in the freezer at Luke's lurking in the back of his head.

[hatesparadise]

You were just asking for improvised explosives to be set off there, Duke!

"No, comfy is far, far in the distance," Danny replied, waving his hand like he was gesturing toward it. "But that's really not the point either. Uh. Yeah. I'm sorry he's a Neanderthal. Never learned to share as a kid."

[betterthanaplan]

"He seemed . . . protective."

Duke was very glad he could lie again.

[hatesparadise]

"The word you're looking for is possessive," Danny said with an amused snort at how diplomatic Duke was being. "He has no off switch when someone challenges him. I told you how he and I met..."

Ah, the classic love story of drawn guns over a crime scene.

[betterthanaplan]

"It was heartwarming, yeah," Duke said. "Seriously, though, meeting him explains so much."

[hatesparadise]

Danny huffed out a quiet laugh, taking a sip of his coffee. "Yeah, he put me in an arm lock in front of a load of HPD guys as a dominance play when I got in his face. It's some weird military thing."

He wasn't helping the case here, was he?

[betterthanaplan]

"And you were besties ever since." Duke shook his head. "Cops, man. You've got weird priorities."

[hatesparadise]

"No, I sucker-punched him, actually." And it super was a sucker-punch. "Because that shit was unprofessional."

But punching him wasn't.

"He's sort of an acquired taste. So, I get it."

[betterthanaplan]

"Your life is weird, man. And think about who's telling you that."