fandomtownies | The Devil's Nest, Friday Night

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The Devil's Nest, Friday Night

Somehow, Lucifer felt a bit less-- unstable, these past few days, than he had since he'd returned. It was welcome, even if he hadn't realized until now just how much the bag of cats in his mind had been demanding distraction until it had gone silent on him.

Which meant he was now finally thinking about things he hadn't really had the energy for, before.

"No, we're not doing jello shots, Tiny," he sighed, leaning on the bar. "That's someone else's trademark, I'm hardly going to take it from her."

He took a thoughtful sip of his drink.

"Though I haven't actually seen her in a while," he said. "I think we had a row at some point?" He eyed Tiny. "Do you think this is a situation where a gift basket might help?"

Duke said a gift basket worked if you delivered it in person! ... In Octavia's case, anyway. He had no idea about Summer.

Tiny just grunted and went back to putting glasses in the dishwasher.

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It's a bar.

Lucifer made it to the piano eventually, amusing himself with a smattering of piano covers of 80s jams.

He's around and about.

It wasn’t so much that Jessica actually came up and greeted Lucifer. No. It was more of her giving Lucifer a grunt of acknowledgment of another person at the bar before placing an order of a whiskey double and specifying the bottom shelf brand.

And then downing the drink before signaling Tiny for another.

Lucifer shot her a faintly amused look. He hadn't seen her about here before, had he? He took a note of her order, and lifted his chin at her from behind the bar.

"Planning to stick around a while, or just low standards?"

“A little of column A and a little of column B,” she admitted as she gave the man behind the bar an evaluation. Expensive suit. Very expensive. Tailored. Meticulous hair and grooming.

And then there was the accent. It was enough to make her frown slightly.

“You must make a hell of a lot of tips to afford a suit like that.”

"Oh, I don't work here for the money," Lucifer said, a chuckle in his voice, like that was a ridiculous idea. "Just to entertain myself. I am rather exorbitantly wealthy."

“Yeah. I figured,” Jessica said with her usual snark. “Which brings to mind why someone with such tastes would even bother themselves with an island like this. Are you one of the people who are stuck here?”

"I have friends here," Lucifer said, pouring himself a measure of vodka. "Came here originally on a bit of a vacation. Returned home, finally came close to kindling a romance with a woman I care for greatly, but that fell apart after I had to go to Hell for a few thousand years and she found out she was a gift from God, so I decided to come back for a bit."

"Right. That old chestnut," Jessica said dryly. She finished her drink and made a motion for a refill. "Well it sounds like a better reason than coming to a mysterious island to investigate whether or not a toxic asshole left some kind of trap for-"

She hesitated for just the slightest moment there as she almost admitted something. "-a client of mine."

No. Jessica didn't even bat an eye at Lucifer's explanation. She's heard weirder things in bars.

"Oooh, an investigation?" Lucifer said, perking up. "You know I used to consult with the LAPD homicide department. I miss the work, so do tell."

Edited 2020-11-06 13:18 (UTC)

That actually made Jessica pause. "Yeeeeah. There's not much to tell now. My client was abused by a man who could control people's minds. He had an elaborate scheme to destroy her which failed when he got his neck snapped by some super-powered vigilante," she said carefully editing the truth. "He was trying to make an escape by boat and this island was his final destination. My client was worried that there might be something else he left behind here so I came here to check it out."

She shrugged and took a gulp of her drink. "So how did a guy who went to hell end up working for the LAPD?"

♫ Crime-solving Devil, it makes sense, don't overthink it... ♫

"A friend of mine was murdered," Lucifer said, "and after solving her murder, I just got a bit of a taste for the policework."

Beat.

"But where are my manners. I'm Lucifer Morningstar. And you are?"

"Jessica Jones," she said raising her glass in acknowledgement. "And don't worry about it. I barely have any manners."

"No manners and an iron stomach, be still my heart," Lucifer said, grinning. "That whiskey could strip paint away."

"When it comes to whiskey, I tend to buy in bulk," Jessica said smirking a bit at the wisecrack. "Plus it helps with my side gig of refinishing furniture."

Breaking furniture counted as refinishing it, right?

"Nothing like a hard day's work if you can mix business with pleasure," Lucifer said, smirking back at her as he reached for the vermouth. "Alcohol doesn't actually work on my pesky metabolism, so I just drink the good stuff, but I have to admire your dedication."

"Now that's truly a fucking shame," Jessica said with almost genuine sincerity. "Though I can relate. I usually have to drink a large amount just to feel anything."

Or in truth, numb herself.

"My liver is super powerful. Lamest power ever."

"I am terribly sorry," Lucifer said, sympathetically. "If you want, I can make sure Tiny lines up the especially alcoholic beverages for you tonight, in case you want to move on to the anti-freeze."

"Yeah, I'll pass on the anti-freeze. I'm cool with a hangover but that shit will last for days," she joked. "So booze doesn't even make a dent in you? Not even the tiniest buzz?"

"I once did this Polish vodka that got me slightly buzzed for about thirty seconds," Lucifer said, "Hardly worth it, really. I need more chemicals in my system to get me rolling."

But humans got weird if you started bringing up your narcotics collection.

Jessica looked hardly judgmental at the topic. "Back in college one of my roommate's friend brought home what we thought was regular vodka. Turns out it was homebrewed vodka she brought home from a semester abroad. I was fine but my friend had to go to the ER before she went blind. That Eastern European stuff can fuck with you," she commented.

"Now I'm wondering if I should get Tiny to sort that stuff into a special 'reach in here for superhumans and celestials only' cabinet," Lucifer mused. "... We are talking superhuman here, right? You're not some kind of cousin or niece I've never met before?"

Fun scandal that would be, though.

Celestial?

Jessica looked down at her ripped jeans, leather motorcycle boots, Def Leppard tank top and leather jacket just to make sure she was seeing what he was. She held out her arms so Lucifer could truly appreciate the ensemble.

"Do I look like a fucking angel to you?" she asked, almost smiling. She let her arms come down to the side and finished her drink, signaling for another refill. "Yeah. I got powers. Not sure how. I just woke up with them one day."

"Trust me, I have many siblings who are terrible dressers and would put on an outfit like that without deliberately meaning to or understanding that the only thing that makes that an attractive outfit is doing so deliberately."

Don't let Duke hear he said that.

He finished making his martini and took a sip.

"Just like that? Someone just... popped up overnight and waved a magical wand or something?"

Jessica sighed. Ugh. Personal revelations were the worse.

"My family was in a car accident. I was in a coma for a while and then when I woke up I was stronger, faster, blah, blah blah," she said in a blasé manner. "Don't know how. Don't know why. And quite frankly I don't care enough to find out."

She scoffed.

"If it was a magical wand, I'd like to track down the fairy godmother who waved it and stick it in some place very uncomfortable."

"Oh, I like you," Lucifer said, grinning.

He took another sip.

"Probably my Dad's work," he said. "He's an arsehole like that. Just... sticking miracles places nobody asked Him to."

"Yeah. Well your dad can go fuck himself if that's the case," Jessica said rolling her eyes. "Consent is a big thing for me."

"Likewise," Lucifer said. "What's the point if you can't choose for yourself?"

"Exactly," Jessica agreed and held up an empty glass. "So would you consent to filling my glass again? Paint stripper. Not the anti-freeze."

Lucifer tilted his head.

"I have Tiny for that," he said, "But I'm willing to listen to a good argument if you have one."

Tiny? Oh. There were so much snark there. Jessica just gave Tiny a look to let him know she knew how she got that name. And if it wasn't, she didn't care.

"Well. Tell you what," Jessica said pulling out her wallet. "If you get your hands dirty and give me a drink I got-"

Hmm. Right. She made a T&C run this morning.

"-five dollars right here that you can have for your very own tip."

She smirked and slid the bill across the bar. "Tempting. Right? Look. Someone even drew a tiny dick on Jefferson's face."

"I don't need the tip," Lucifer said primly.

Then he smirked.

"But that is one expertly drawn tiny dick."

He took the bill.

That actually made Jessica smile.

"Does that mean I'm giving the Devil his due?" she teased.

"Now, until a few thousand years ago, I would've said that would require you to be rather more naked," Lucifer said, amused, sliding the bill into his pocket while he reached for the whiskey. "But now I'll take amusement."

"Well the night's still young and I haven't totally abandoned my standards yet," Jessica joked.

"I can assure you I've never gotten complaints," Lucifer said, amused, and leaned over to fill her glass again.

"Hmmm. I don't know. You're not wearing a t-shirt with stains on it and I don't see a pair of jeans that been bedazzled with gems or have a wallet with a chain on it," she said taking a gulp of her drink.

"You'll have to head a bit further north for Jersey," Lucifer said, smirking.

“I told you I had low standards,” she teased.

For all Eric-related inquiries.

Me, a journalist, not actively on breaking news desk right now*, and also all of my Dutch colleagues, regardless of breaking news desk status:

* okay, i was on the tech desk last night, desperately trying to keep up with news about Big Social Media fly-swatting election stuff so i was kind of on breaking news

Edited 2020-11-06 17:26 (UTC)

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The Devil's Nest, Friday Night

Have a Drink

Listen to the Music

Talk to Lucifer

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