fandomtownies | Fandom Fire House, Friday

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Fandom Fire House, Friday

Travis was teaching Probie to slide down the fire pole. Was it necessary? Not even a little. Was it safe? Also no. Was it adorable? One hundred percent.

Hey, if he got to enjoy a Pole Day, everyone got to enjoy a Pole Day.

It's Pole Day!
Come slide down the Fandom fire pole*!
slide at your own risk fandom fire department assumes no responsibility for injuries incurred on the fandom fire pole void where prohibited side effects of sliding down the fire pole may include dizziness euphoria sudden transformation blue hand syndrome and death no purchase necessary see store for details no puppies were injured in the making of this post fire pole is fictional any resemblance to any fire pole living or dead is purely coincidental the author is broke and writing this for fun please don't sue offer expires when mun gets bored or goes to bed

That's right, he meant everyone.

[open! any side effects from the fire pole are entirely moddable, yes. Look, sometimes you start writing a disclaimer and get carried away, okay?]

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Octavia was just passing by on her way back from her usual off-island Friday appointment, but she had to stop and eye that sign with faintly raised eyebrows.

Because what the hell was a Pole Day?

“Considering taking a spin?” Travis asked.

Octavia nodded at the sign. "Even I know there should be a sex joke on there," she rasped. Even though that was probably just her partners' sense of humor rubbing off on her. "Why do you have a pole?"

“Old fire house tradition,” Travis said. He was used to people wanting to make dirty jokes out of things. “The idea was it’d be a faster way to get from the upper floors to the ground in an emergency. Lots of places don’t have them anymore, since they’re kind of dangerous if you don’t do it right, but they are a hell of a lot of fun.”

Octavia looked faintly like she thought that sounded absurd. Not necessarily the 'fun' part, but --

"They replaced stairs with basically a big stick to slide down on?"

"To be clear, there were also still stairs," Travis said. "...But yes."

"That seems kinda dumb."

She was still eyeing the pole with something approaching mild interest, though.

Travis shrugged. "In retrospect, so are many traditions. Still fun, though."

"I don't know if I buy that."

Be shocked, Travis. Surely she came off super fun-loving? With her deadpan demeanor and all.

"Least not without trying."

... Okay, there was that.

She was in fact very intense.

"Well then. Right this way." He gestured with his head then started for the stairs.

Former queens of (literally) underground cults tended to be like that. Sorry about that.

Octavia followed in silence, with a few vaguely curious glances around.

How did former queens of underground cults handle excited puppies? Because Probie was headed right for her.

Travis, glancing back to continue talking, hadn't noticed the puppy yet. "It's Octavia, right? We met once, ages ago."

Octavia noticed, though.

"And who's that?"

Travis looked just in time for Probie to go leaping past him. He startled with a laugh.

"That would be Probie, my new recruit. She's still a little green, but she's got promise."

Octavia crouched down to offer her hand out for sniffing and inspecting.

"Probie, huh?"

Probie's entire body wagged with excitement as she attacked Octavia's hand with her tongue.

"It's another firehouse tradition," Travis said. "'Probie' is short for 'probationary'. Like calling someone the 'new kid'."

Octavia glanced up at Travis, then snorted softly at Probie's excitement. But also let her hand get thoroughly licked.

"Yu laik branon, hmm, strikon?" she rasped, to the puppy. "Yu's brana?"

Sorry, there was a reason Duke had once suspected she liked animals better than people.

Travis raised an eyebrow, not recognizing the language. But people said dumb things to small animals all the time, most of which were entirely meaningless, so he let it go.

"Might get confusing if we ever get any human recruits, but we'll just have to call them 'human probie'."

All animals understood Trig. This was Octavia's long-held belief.

(Or just an instinct she had. Whichever.)

She also gave into a moment longer of petting, once the hand inspection seemed to be over. "Sure they'd love that."

"Teasing the new recruits is yet another tradition," Travis assured her, leading them up the rest of the stairs to the base of the pole. Even considering the relative tininess of the Fandom firetrucks, the garage was large and airy, more than two standard stories tall, so the fire pole itself was a good thirty feet long. There was a haphazardly constructed gate blocking immediate access to the hole it ran through through the floor.

"So! Have you ever slid down a pole before? Maybe on the playground in elementary school or something?"

Poor Travis still thought elementary school might be a relatively common touchstone around here.

Why did that gate make it look more dangerous, somehow?

Also: "Didn't go to school, so, no."

Had there even been anything resembling a playground on the Ark? She didn't know.

Travis just kind of blinked at her for a long moment while he processed that, then moved on.

"Okay, well. The idea is to use the friction of your hands and legs on the pole to slow your descent enough to keep you safe."

Octavia kept on giving him a flat look until he was done processing.

Then gave the pole another look.

"So... Slide, don't fall?"

"Exactly. Want me to show you, or do you think you can give it a go?"

Another calculating look at the pole.

And then Octavia shrugged. "How hard can it really be?"

She'd definitely done more dangerous things before. Even if that didn't mean she didn't cast an apprehensive glance at the hole when she stepped up closer to it.

"I knew a woman who broke both her legs going down one too fast," Travis said. "....My old fire captain only let us use ours back in Seattle on special occasions."

Hence "Pole Day".

Octavia gave him a dry look. Really not selling how this had been a smart thing to start installing in fire houses, Travis.

"Should you even be letting people on it?"

"You live on an island that didn't even have a fire crew until I showed up," Travis said. "And you want to be cautious now?"

Octavia managed to convey the sense of an eye roll without actually rolling her eyes.

It was a skill.

"We didn't need a fire crew," she drawled. "And you're the one who brought up serious injury."

"I like to be sure people know what they're getting into," Travis said. He was very impressed by her eye roll technique. He'd be trying to practice that in the mirror later. "And--you did, actually. Need a fire crew. You are all very very lucky you haven't all died in a horrible fire before now."

"There weren't fires, what did we need you for?"

But, whatever. Octavia was just going to go for it, now. It seemed pretty intuitive to her, really, and it turned out it was. Going down the pole was not a comfortable thing to be doing, by any means, but she didn't plunge straight into a horrible injury or anything.

In fact, the slide went pretty well - until there were only a few feet left, and she suddenly felt like she was falling, and had no grip on anything at all --

And then had four little paws when she landed on the floor. Because she was a raccoon.

Again.

Travis watched her go with a faint smile.

And then a frown.

And then a lot of confusion. He jumped onto the pole to get down as fast as possible himself (look, it really was faster than stairs) as Probie launched herself down the stairs, barking.

Look, he'd read the disclaimer on the sign himself, but he thought it was a joke, okay? "I thought that was a joke!"

Octavia chittered up at him.

Already kind of more concerned with whether he had any delicious things on him than anything else, to be honest.

... Until she tried to run away from the barking thing, anyway.

“No no no no no! Bad raccoon!” Travis gestured madly for Probie to keep back. Probie had no idea what that meant, but was at least confused enough to stop barking. “Okay. Okay. Animal control—probably doesn’t exist here. Um. Octavia? Are you, uh. Still in there?”

Octavia was still trying to skitter right on out of the building, sorry.

Which didn't really mean much in terms of whether there was much human still left in the driver's seat or not, actually.

“The devil guy is going to murder me.” Travis looked around, the grabbed a handy box. “Probie, how are you at herding?”

Probie wagged her tail and panted. We’re they playing again? She liked playing!

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Fandom Fire House, Friday

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