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The Devil's Nest, Tuesday Night

The whiteboard was back in the axe range. Its contents had now expanded quite obviously, and they were but a fraction of the notes Lucifer had taken back on the Rouge.

But he didn't need those notes anymore. He was rendering this plan down into its final form. He had moved from Wagner on to Verdi as his deliberations reached a crescendo, and--

"That's it!" he crowed. "That's how I get back at you, Daniel!"

He tossed his marker carelessly behind him. "Oh, this calls for a drink! Tiny!"

Tiny shoved a scotch into his hand with a melodramatic eyeroll.

Lucifer cackled.

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From Tiny, not the madman blasting Verdi over the speakers.

Once Lucifer's settled down, it switches to slightly less dramatic pop.

He's looking quite pleased with himself, post-crescendo.

"You look entirely too pleased with yourself," Duke noted as he came over, bearing drinks for them both (scotch for Lucifer, and a simple beer for himself). "Finally got your revenge-ducks in order, huh?"

"It's going to cost me several million dollars," Lucifer said, grinning at his whiteboard from his seat. "And it'll be worth every penny."

"Remind me not to get on your bad side," Duke said, sliding into the seat next to Lucifer and looking the whiteboard over himself. "So when does this plan go into action?"

"It'll take a few weeks to set up. Enough time to lull Daniel into that false sense of security we talked about," Lucifer said, glancing at Duke as he reached for the drink Duke had brought him.

Duke sipped his beer and nodded. "And it looks pretty, uh. Complex. Lots of moving pieces to put in place."

"Yes, but also plenty of places where I can improvise if Dan somehow manages to surprise anyone," Lucifer said. "Which seems unlikely."

"He's not that quick on the uptake, huh?"

"He's quite slow," Lucifer agreed. "It's a miracle they ever made him Detective. Probably corruption at work."

"That does sound like the police," Duke agreed. "You going to bribe any of his fellow officers into participating in this prank-for-all? Or just seasoned criminals like me?"

"I think it's best to keep the law out of it, at least on this end of the border," Lucifer said. He took a sip of his drink. "Don't want him running to the Detective."

"Ah. Yeah, she'd probably object to a plan like this one, wouldn't she."

She seemed like a very "the law is Good" kind of person. Like Nathan was.

"It took me months to convince her to go get drunk with the girls near the beginning of our partnership," Lucifer said, which he felt explained it quite well. "Wouldn't let me smoke pot at crime scenes either."

"Should've gotten a medical marijuana card," Duke said, smiling. "'Oh, but Detective! This is legal drugs!'"

"She still would've frowned," Lucifer said. He sounded faintly nostalgic. "Puff, puff, stomp angrily."

"Such a goody two-shoes," Duke said. He shook his head, then very gracefully changed the subject. "So, uh. Speaking of LA ladies."

Very gracefully. Yes.

Lucifer tossed him a curious glance. "Yes...?"

He was still too busy basking in his success to really pick up on the awkwardness.

"You, uh. Think you could give me Dr. Linda's number?"

Look, it had taken a bit to realize, but he'd actually kind of liked talking to her last time. Maybe they could get drunk and she could pretend to therapize him on a regular basis. . . .

Lucifer blinked. He really hadn't expected that.

"It's still the same as when I gave it to you months ago," he said. "Years? I don't remember."

Time had gotten a bit stretchy like taffy here.

"Uh. Yeah." Duke shook his head. "I . . . definitely don't still have it."

It'd gotten a little muzzy on his end, too.

"Well, all right," Lucifer said, reaching for his phone and flicking to her contact. "Here," he said, handing it over.

Everything in this post lifted from Lucifer episode 5x08, 'Spoiler Alert'.

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