The Devil's Nest, Friday Night

[my_own_advocate]

"First nerds, now jazzercize?"

Lucifer stared. First at them. Then at Tiny. Then back at them.

"No, absolutely not," he snarled. He dashed towards the legwarmer-wearing miscreants in a flurry of fussy rage, waving his arms about. "Move! Go wither away in neon elsewhere!"

He whipped around and glared at Tiny as they scrambled away. "I am playing Metallica!" he announced, and rushed to the piano.

Tiny did not seem moved by any of it.

[[ open! ]]

Comments

[betterthanaplan]

Duke watched the group of . . . dancers? . . . file out grumbling as he came in.

"Did I miss a notice about 80s night somewhere?"

[my_own_advocate]

"It's been an odd week," Lucifer called from the piano. "First it was gamers, now it's-- them."

[betterthanaplan]

"Eric still trying to piss you off?" Duke guessed, heading over to take up his usual lean.

[my_own_advocate]

"No, it doesn't quite feel like his style," Lucifer said, frowning. "It's almost as if the universe is conspiring to make my life miserable."

... within a very narrow bandwidth of 'slightly inconveniencing him at work before he went home to his loving partners at night'.

[betterthanaplan]

“Never knew you had such a strong reaction to spandex.”

[my_own_advocate]

"The spandex is one thing," Lucifer said, eyes narrowing towards the door. "But the legwarmers!"

[betterthanaplan]

"You don't think their legs should be warm?"

Duke was enjoying this conversation way too much.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer's gaze snapped back to him, scandalized. "They were neon!"

[betterthanaplan]

"And, uh, what's wrong with neon, then?" Duke asked, settling in for a good rant.

[my_own_advocate]

"It's hideous, obviously," Lucifer said, staring. "Please tell me all that plaid hasn't finally crawled into your head and died there."

[betterthanaplan]

"Ooo, you know what I bet they'd love?" Duke asked, beaming. "Neon plaid."

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer blanched.

"You need to go stand in the corner right now," he said, pointing, "and think about what you've said."

[betterthanaplan]

Duke laughed. "Oh, are you going to punish me now?"

[my_own_advocate]

"Neon plaid," Lucifer said. "Neon. Plaid. That's worse than anything my demons could come up with!"

[betterthanaplan]

"No offense to Maze, but your demons don't strike me as all that creative."

[my_own_advocate]

"They are where it comes to torture, I assure you," Lucifer harrumped.

[betterthanaplan]

"Uh huh. You still haven't given me a reason why you don't like neon."

[my_own_advocate]

"You're not seriously telling me you don't grasp that neon is hideous?" Lucifer asked.

[betterthanaplan]

"It's literally just bright."

[my_own_advocate]

"Oh, so you'd have no trouble at all if I replaced all your ugly sweaters with neon orange ones?" Lucifer retorted.

[betterthanaplan]

"Would they be cozy neon orange sweaters?"

[my_own_advocate]

"Does it matter? They're neon orange, people could spot them in the dark!"

[betterthanaplan]

"Sooo . . . I'll never get shot in the woods."

Duke would hate them. But he sure wasn't going to say that now.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer looked up at him, absolutely appalled, about to argue--

...

"You're messing with me."

[betterthanaplan]

"You're cute when you're mad about fashion," Duke said, not at all repentant.

[my_own_advocate]

"You're infuriating," Lucifer told him, rising to his feet.

[betterthanaplan]

"I know," Duke said, reaching for Lucifer's collar. "You wouldn't have me any other way."

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer let out an irritated sigh that sounded like he was absolutely ready to argue.

But, well, Duke's fingers were on his collar, so he supposed he should kiss the man first.

[betterthanaplan]

Good. If he hadn't, he'd find his argument drowned out by Duke kissing him, instead.

Duke pulled back after a moment, but only a scant inch or so. "Look at you, all riled up."

[my_own_advocate]

"Neon legwarmers, Duke," Lucifer sighed. "Honestly."

He was putting in no effort to move further away.

[betterthanaplan]

"Now be honest," Duke said. "Which part pisses you off more, the neon, or the legwarmer?"

[my_own_advocate]

"Legwarmers can work under very specific, usually mostly naked circumstances," Lucifer sighed. "For neon, there's no excuse."

[betterthanaplan]

"None?" Duke asked. "Not even . . . an 80s themed rager featuring blacklights and body paint?"

[my_own_advocate]

"Why are you like this?" Lucifer demanded, as he kissed Duke again.

[betterthanaplan]

Duke laughed gently into the kiss. "What other way do you want me to be?"

[my_own_advocate]

"You could be less infuriating if you wanted to be," Lucifer said.

Which was both an accusation and not actually an answer and he was hoping Duke wouldn't notice.

[betterthanaplan]

"Uh huh. I could say the same about you too. But I don't think either of us really wants that."

[my_own_advocate]

"How am I infuriating?" Lucifer demanded. "Right now?"

Lucifer, let go of Duke's belt loops, that would help your case.

[betterthanaplan]

Lucifer don't you dare let go of Duke's belt loops. He hasn't let go of your lapels.

"You mean, other than your overblown reactions to fashion faux pas?"

[my_own_advocate]

"They are not overblown," Lucifer argued. "Someone should stick up for proper style and aesthetics around here."

Would Eric mind if he shoved Duke up against the back wall and kissed his stupid mouth for a while? Asking for a friend.

[betterthanaplan]

Eric would just have to deal if he did.

"Oh yeah? Tell me more about proper aesthetics."

[my_own_advocate]

"Oh, you know exactly what I mean," Lucifer said, rolling his eyes. "Despite your cheap provocation."

[betterthanaplan]

“Ah yes. Everything you personally enjoy is fabulous, and everything else is terrible.”

[my_own_advocate]

"Because I have taste," Lucifer argued.

... and a no-sex pact with Octavia until Sunday, which may have been part of why he was more or less accidentally pushing Duke back towards a booth.

"While many humans are deeply disappointing."

[betterthanaplan]

"Can't argue with that," Duke said, letting himself be pushed. (Though if asked, he would declare a no-sex pact absolutely ridiculous.) "Though I'll always argue with you about whether or not fashion is objective."

[my_own_advocate]

Octavia had this whole theory about anticipation making date night better, and after freaking out at the thought of a five-day sex pause (the horror) Lucifer now felt obliged to try this different, shorter pause.

It had been elss than 24 hours and he was already thinking about making use of his 'okay, but I still get to climb Duke like a tree' pass.

"I don't think there's anyone alive who would call you fashionable."

[betterthanaplan]

Duke gasped in mock offense. "I'll have you know there's at least two people," he said, enjoying Lucifer's not at all subtle climbing attempts. ". . . Assuming either is still alive at this point."

[my_own_advocate]

"You mean figments of your imagination," Lucifer said, and pushed Duke into a booth so he could kiss him properly.