Rey's warehouse- Friday afternoon

[thatwaslucky]

You know that anniversary that had been on Rey's mind? It was today. She was both trying not to think about it and finding it impossible not to think about, and she wasn't really up to training training today. Instead she was trying to organize things around the warehouse some, since last week's missing equipment had magically reappeared, keeping herself busy with the little things.

Maybe later she'd try to be one of those people who could veg in front of the TV. She got the appeal now.

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[sith_happened]

"Rey?" Anakin called, entering the warehouse. "I have fancy ice cream."

[thatwaslucky]

"There's fancy ice cream?" she asked, looking back at him.

[sith_happened]

"There's very fancy ice cream," Anakin confirmed, holding up a few pints, "and Rory has send ones with all of the chocolate."

[thatwaslucky]

"Thank you, Rory," Rey said, closing the storage palm tree to walk over. "It's that kind of day."

[sith_happened]

"I know," Anakin said with a small, sympathetic smile.

[thatwaslucky]

"I'm dealing with it," she told him. "It's just a quiet day than normal."

[sith_happened]

Anakin nodded. "Sometimes quiet is unhelpful."

[thatwaslucky]

Rey nodded. "I thought I should maybe go home but... I don't know that anyone quite gets it."

Everyone was sad about Leia. No one understood why she was sad about Ben.

[sith_happened]

Anakin handed over the pint of fancy ice cream. "Talk me through it?" he requested.

[thatwaslucky]

She took the ice cream, and went to a different storage Palm tree for spoons.

"I don't know how many other people think about the exact date," she said. "And if they do, they remember Leia. But it was more than just Leia for me, and I'm alone on that."

[sith_happened]

"Her son, too," Anakin guessed.

[thatwaslucky]

She nodded again. "No one understands it. I don't even understand it."

[sith_happened]

"You feel what you feel," Anakin said. "It's not a day to overthink it."

[thatwaslucky]

"It's like if I don't then what I feel's more confusing," she admitted. "But at the same time, I don't want to."

[sith_happened]

"You miss them both," Anakin said. "Your relationship with Ben--" Different Ben, still incredibly strange to say, "--was different that what everyone else saw."

[thatwaslucky]

"And it was impossible to explain," Rey said. "Every time I tried I know it sounded awful, but there was more to it that I felt but if I ever tried to say it I think it looked like I was covering for him."

Kind of impossible to talk about without sounding like she needed the intervention of a mandated reporter, to be honest.

[sith_happened]

"And it's so hard to feel you have to justify what you're going through," Anakin said. "He had done terrible, terrible things, but you had a connection."

[thatwaslucky]

Another nod. "And I know he did terrible things to me, we tried to kill each other, but people don't seem to understand that he wasn't always like that, and he didn't always need to be. And then he was gone as soon as he turned back."

It was fine. It was all fine.

[sith_happened]

"So you're mourning the potential future, too," Anakin said quietly.

[thatwaslucky]

Rey was quiet for a moment, both trying to get he words together and also because she fully expected to start crying. "There was someone out there who completely got me, after being alone most of my life, and I spent years having to keep myself separate from him. I never got to know what could have been if we ever got to have that connection as it should have been."

[sith_happened]

Anakin sent a wave of reassurance through the Force. "I'm so sorry."

[thatwaslucky]

She gave a little smile of things. "Nothing to be done about it now."

[sith_happened]

"Still," Anakin said. "Would you like a hug?"

[thatwaslucky]

She didn't even answer, just glommed on for the hug.

[sith_happened]

Anakin was going to hold on for as long as she needed him to.

[thatwaslucky]

"He's the only reason I'm alive," she murmured.

[sith_happened]

"Then I am grateful to him," Anakin said.

Though the helmet worshipping was still weird.

[thatwaslucky]

"Me too," she said, pulling back. "Thank you for letting me talk."

[sith_happened]

"Always," Anakin said with a small smile. "I'm proof that letting it fester inside leads absolutely nowhere good."

[thatwaslucky]

"I don't know if I let it fester..." she said.

[sith_happened]

"Good," Anakin said, smiling. "You're better adjusted than I am."

[thatwaslucky]

"I appreciate that today," she admitted.

[sith_happened]

"You're very welcome," Anakin said. "Now eat the ice cream. I promise it helps."

[thatwaslucky]

"Yes, sir," she said, handing him a spoon as she opened the ice cream.

[sith_happened]

"And now I can eat the ice cream too," Anakin said happily.