The Magpie Emporium, Thursday (4/2)

[drumsticksandd20s]

The gremlins had thrown an April Fool's party in here last night after closing, or at least that was how Steph chose to interpret the abundance of very tiny confetti (tiny for confetti at least but still too big to qualify as glitter, in her totally expert opinion) and streamers all over the store.

Plus the spring snakes that kept popping out of the shelves whenever she pulled a book out to relocate it. And the very small whoopee cushion on her office chair.

At least they were classic goofy pranks and not shitty mean ones?

Little Bot trundled by with yet another dustpan full of confetti as Steph picked up another snake and deposited it with all the others in a big utility tote bin. That had a lid that latched shut. Around here, she figured, assuming those snakes wouldn't just turn real was probably a bad idea.

[OOC: Open, but guaranteed slow as I herd cats today.]

Comments

[giveittoyoursister]

For some reason, Vi had decided it was a good idea to bring pizza for lunch, holding the box loosely in front of her as she looked around the store. "What happened here?"

[drumsticksandd20s]

"Gremlins got wild and crazy after midnight, is my best guess," Steph said wryly, making grabby hands at -- Vi, or the pizza? Yes. "I've found so many surprises from them today."

Saffron lifted her head and mewed pitifully at Snuggle Human from her perch above the jigsaw puzzles. She hadn't been particularly enamored of the gremlins' surprises. But she'd been perfectly dignified the whole time she was screeching and leaping four feet straight up in the air.

[giveittoyoursister]

Vi had no doubt Saffron had been the most dignified cat in the store.

"Hopefully this is more pleasant one. Got your favourite here," she said, passing Steph the box. "And also that pizza you like."

[drumsticksandd20s]

"You're always the best surprise," Steph told her as she took the box and opened it up, making a happy noise as she inhaled the scent of what was basically a cheeseburger and tomato sauce on dough. "The pizza's just a bonus."

[giveittoyoursister]

Vi grinned as she watched Steph. "Figured you deserved something fresh and hot. Like you always do."

[drumsticksandd20s]

"So you brought me two fresh and hot things." Steph reached over to grab a handful of Vi's shirt and pull her in for a kiss. "Above and beyond, always."

[giveittoyoursister]

Vi kept smiling into the kiss, shifting around to lean in against Steph. "Gotta make an effort for my girl."

[drumsticksandd20s]

Steph pulled back just a tiny bit and asked, "Really? Because you make it seem so effortless. No offense to the gremlins, but you're a much nicer surprise than the ones they left me."

[giveittoyoursister]

"I would throw down with each and every one of the gremlins if they gave you this kind of surprise," Vi said, somehow both teasing and completely earnest.

[drumsticksandd20s]

"First of all, ew," Steph replied, amusement sparkling in her eyes. She snagged a slice of pizza and took a bite, making more happy noises as she chewed. "Second of all, not a chance in hell."

[giveittoyoursister]

Vi laughed and sat up on the counter. "I'm sure they'll be devastated to hear that."

[drumsticksandd20s]

"They'll get over it." Steph held the open pizza box out to Vi as she came over to lean against the counter beside her. "As much time as they spend here, you'd think they know better by now."

[giveittoyoursister]

Vi reached for her own slice of pizza, chewing thoughtfully. "You'd think that, but we have people who are still trying to make friends with Saffron."

[drumsticksandd20s]

"Excellent point." Steph made a face that was only more comical for the way she was stretching out a long mozzarella string between her mouth and her pizza slice. "And they get super into their games. And I know how that can go because I've met me. Anyway, you don't have to worry about that. Just about random glitter bombs and fake snakes popping out of the shelves."

How dare, Steph. That was confetti, not glitter.

[giveittoyoursister]

"I hear the glitter around here can have terrible side effects," Vi teased. "Makes you want to kiss people."

Good thing it was confetti, then.

[drumsticksandd20s]

Steph laughed. "So I've heard. You're not saying you need outside motivation to want to kiss me, are you?"

Honestly, with as much time as they spent joined at the mouth, even if they did get hit by glitter it wasn't likely that anyone would notice the difference.

[giveittoyoursister]

"I definitely wouldn't say that," Vi said. "But who knows what might happen with all this glitter about the place."

You would continue to kiss the absurd amount you already did.

[drumsticksandd20s]

"I mean, we could try and find out." Steph polished off the last of her pizza slice and reached for another one. "Except I was already planning on kissing you breathless right after lunch. And then some more when we get home."

None of this was remotely a surprise. Also you would continue to neglect Saffron horribly.

[giveittoyoursister]

Vi gasped in mock-surprise. "It must have already gotten to you."

How was Saffron supposed to endure this trial?

[drumsticksandd20s]

Steph put a hand to her forehead and affected a pitiful sigh. "I have been here all day, so probably, yeah. If only there was some way to deal with this."

It was bad enough that Saffron had to deal with this, and then her hunans just had to be even more obnoxious about it with their pretending.

[giveittoyoursister]

"Don't worry," Vi said, dramatically, as she helped herself to another slice of pizza. "I'm here to help in any way you need."

Didn't they know that Saffron was the one who was truly suffering here?

[drumsticksandd20s]

Steph pretended to swoon and collapse against Vi. "Hold me," she said in a tremulous voice. "That's the best thing you could do right now."

Ugh, that would just compound Saffron's suffering.

[giveittoyoursister]

"Anything for you," Vi declared, free arm snaking around Steph's waist.


Where were Saffron's cuddles? Especially when she really could die from a lack of them.

[drumsticksandd20s]

"Your gallantry is, in fact, deeply sexy," Steph informed her as she wasted no time cheerfully snuggling into Vi's side.

Look at that pitiful paw dangling down from Saffron's shelf perch! Look at it!

[giveittoyoursister]

"Only the best for you," Vi told Steph as she nuzzled the top of her head. "I'm like a paladin of hugs."

Look at how it twitched as the urge to live drained from Saffron's body!