Outside the Kwik Stop, Saturday

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

Parents Weekend. The last, best chance for a quick buck.

Jay and Silent Bob were ready to do some business.

[[They've been here aaaaaall along. *wiggles fingers in Jedi-mind-trick manner*]]

Comments

[mamakimknows.livejournal.com]

Mrs. Kim was out for her morning walk--that it wasn't the right town didn't matter. There was a small town, she was going to walk around it.

She nodded politely as she passed Jay and Silent Bob.

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

Jay jerked his chin at her in greeting with an almost absent pelvic thrust. "Hey, sexy mama."

[mamakimknows.livejournal.com]

She stopped, turned around, and glared at him. "Stay away from my daughter. And Rory Gilmore. And girls in general."

Then she pointed at Silent Bob. "You. Why don't you stop him?"

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

"No guarauntee the ladies can stay away from me," Jay leered, wagging his tongue a little at her.

Silent Bob spread his hands and looked helpless.

[mamakimknows.livejournal.com]

"You are not a gentleman." She looked strangely disappointed in Silent Bob.

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

Silent Bob looked suitably chastised.

"Fuck, this tubby bitch couldn't stop me fucking his mom," Jay laughed. "He's the fucking sidekick here."

[mamakimknows.livejournal.com]

"Watch your language," Mrs. Kim snapped, "Or I will wash your mouth out with soap."

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

Only Jay would interpret this as a come on. He swaggered closer, leering. "I like a kinky MILF."

Silent Bob groaned - silently - and facepalmed.

[mamakimknows.livejournal.com]

Mrs. Kim grabbed Jay's ear, not knowing what a MILF was, but understanding the word kinky and not liking the implication. "You will behave properly in the presence of females."

[callthisadate.livejournal.com]

Nikki wandered along, looking for Shawn (again). She smiled at Jay and Silent Bob in a preoccupied way as she passed them.

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

"Holy fuck, tubby, look at the underage ass! I thought this was a weekend for parents and shit. Fuck, I love this town," Jay commented to his sidekick.

[callthisadate.livejournal.com]

Nikki stopped and looked at Jay in disbelief. Had she just heard what she thought she'd heard?

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, bitch, I'm talkin' about you," Jay leered. "Ain't that right, lunchbox?"

Silent Bob endeavoured to look apologetic.

[callthisadate.livejournal.com]

Oh please. Lunchbox?

'When was the last time you actually talked to a girl? Or got within three feet of one?'

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

Silent Bob was snickering.

"Fuck, bitch, the ladies love me!" Jay protested. "I got 'em lined up for a little bit of uh uh uh," this with appropriate pelvic thrusting and spanking motions.

[callthisadate.livejournal.com]

'Oh really?' Nikki snapped. 'I doubt that.'

She wasn't about to show how embarrassed she was.

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

Silent Bob nodded, letting her know that her suspicions were correct. Jay noticed and scowled, punching him. "Fuck you, lunchbox!"

[apocalypsesoon.livejournal.com]

JOhn needed food. Prepared, pre-packaged food.

He walked over to the Kwik Stop, intent on some jerky, Chewlie's Gum, and about 5000 gallons of caffeine.

[t-sanest-choice.livejournal.com]

The Terminator followed closely, keeping a sharp eye out.

[apocalypsesoon.livejournal.com]

"Dude. You need to stop following me."

[t-sanest-choice.livejournal.com]

The Terminator fell back a bit, but did not stop following. "Negative, I must fulfill my mission."

[apocalypsesoon.livejournal.com]

JOhn seriously hoped that people would not take him for his gay robot lover. Srsly. "I'll buy you a Twinkie or something."

[t-sanest-choice.livejournal.com]

"What?"

[apocalypsesoon.livejournal.com]

"Twinkie. Prepackaged cake shell with creamy filling insert. Roumered to have indefinite shelf life."

[t-sanest-choice.livejournal.com]

"You eat it?" he asked, searching his memory banks for any refferences.