fandomtownies | James T Kirk Memorial Causeway, Saturday Late Morning

Contrary to any weather patterns on the island or the mainland, the causeway was shrouded in a thick fog. Its tendrils were slowly spreading out through the streets of Fandom; if it continued at the same rate the entire town would be fog bound in a few hours. It was cold and damp and dismal, the perfect weather for a viking raid.

Or in this case...

If anyone was around, they would have heard a sound like distant rhythmic thunder start to come out of the fog. It got louder and closer until it became possible to pick out many rough deep inhuman voices in it, along with the rhythmic boom, boom of many large feet hitting the ground in unison.

Gradually large dark shadows appeared in the fog, revealing themselves as very large, very ugly.... things. If anyone was watching and knew anything about certain non-human species, they would've recognised them as trolls.

Row upon row of lots of big, ugly, vicious, dim-witted trolls stomped their way out of the fog. When they were all through, the two trolls at the head of the group called a halt to the group. You could tell they were the leaders because they both wore shiny helmets with big pointy horns on them.

"Right!" the first one, Grrarg, yelled. "We have orders. Group... you guys here," he said, waving his hand at the left handed side of the troll horde, not quite sure of counting to one. "Follow me. We go to where the females are. Protect them, stomp on anything trying to hurt them. Maybe get laid."

A cheer went up from the trolls he'd indicated, while the others looked maybe a little annoyed that they weren't chosen. Maybe not. It was hard to tell with trolls as they always looked a little annoyed.

The second leader troll, Gragrr, addressed the possibly annoyed trolls. "We go church," he said. There was a long pause as the horde waited for more, but that seemed to be Gragrr's entire motivational speech. A half-hearted cheer went up from his group more out of duty than real enthusiasm.

"Right!" Grrarg yelled, raising his large cudgel (which he called Big Stick Good For Hitting Things) over his head. "We go now! Everyone follow!"

Slowly with a lot of grumbling and other less pleasant but nonetheless usual troll noises, the group split into two and headed down the streets of Fandom to their chosen destinations.

But trolls were not known for the focus, or their dedication to a cause and as they went, a large number got distracted by all the lovely things they were passing that they could smash. As a troll brain was very small, it took little to no effort for them to forget their orders and convince themselves that they were really here to loot and pillage and rampage. Most trolls could turn anything into an imperative to loot and pillage and rampage. It was a genetic gift.

So it was that the groups that arrived at Efferton and at the church were much smaller than the groups that had started out from the causeway. And there were random groups of trolls running around Fandom having a trollish good old time hitting and smashing things.

[OOC: this is the post with the rampaging trolls. There will be threads for each location as the trolls get to them.

Locations contained herein:
J,GOB
Empire Records
ABIS
The Park
The Beach

Other locations where trolls can be found:
All and Sundries
The Arms Hotel
Efferton Manor
Our Lady of Fandom Church
The School]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Boat go crash," the troll growled, his wrapper fell to the ground as he swing his club dangerously as he moved towards Jay and Bob. He didn't seem to be going very fast, but he looked toughter than the other two.

Jay and Silent Bob looked at each other. "Well, c'mon, lunchbox, whip out some of them sweetass toys of yours!" Jay said urgently, and Bob began rummaging. Jay rolled his eyes and grabbed the discarded crowbar, moving forward first.

"You go splash," the troll apparently was still finishing his sentence. He brought his club down towards Jay's head.

Silent Bob would have shouted a warning. But he was silent by nature, which meant that Jay crumpled to the ground, the crowbar clattered to the side. Bob's eyes narrowed and he reached into his coat, pulling out a grappling gun and firing it towards the thing's head. The bigger they are the harder they fall, after all.

The grappling hook hit the troll in the nostril and it howled in rage and pain. He reached for the wire and gave it a tug.

Silent Bob went with the tug, retracting the grappling hook and sending himself right into the troll. Specifically, sending his feet in the direction of the troll's groin.

Hey, it had worked before.

And they still were delicate parts. It looked dangerously like the troll was about to topple on top of Silent Bob however.

Silent Bob eeped and dropped to the ground, rolling quickly out of the way.

Rolling to his side, the troll tried to kick at Bob.

Silent Bob grabbed his fallen comrade's prybar and flung it at the troll's head even as his foot connected and Bob took a short flight.

The hit crushed the troll's head and his body turned to stone as well.

Bob climbed to his feet, shaking his head a little dazedly. Two trolls made of stone and one unconscious, plus one unconscious sidekick. Bob decided that the prudent course of action would be to run away before more showed up.

He bent and lifted Jay into his arms, making his way towards the clinic.

James T Kirk Memorial Causeway, Saturday Late Morning

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