fandomtownies | Caritas - Friday evening [Open]

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Caritas - Friday evening [Open]

Word got around fast in Fandom. GOB had heard about his mother appearing at the school assembly today.

That's why GOB was drinking tonight.

Crouched down behind the bar. Just in case.

[OOC: Distracted by packing and my connection SUCKS tonight. Probably best to mod Tino at this point.]

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Mother, do you think theyll drop the bomb?
Mother, do you think theyll like this song?
Mother, do you think theyll try to break my balls?
Ooooowaa mother, should I build a wall?

Mama,just killed a man,
Put a gun against his head,
Pulled my trigger,now hes dead,
Mama,life had just begun,
But now Ive gone and thrown it all away-
Mama ooo,
Didnt mean to make you cry-
If Im not back again this time tomorrow-
Carry on,carry on,as if nothing really matters-

Becky arrived, ready to shoot anyone who mentioned last weekend, and looked around the bar in confusion.

Then she leaned over the bar.

"What are you doing?"

"Hiding from my mother," GOB said. He wasn't going to pretend this was anything else.

"...is she here?" Becky asked, slightly alarmed.

"Tino told me that she spoke at the school," GOB said. "I don't think she'll come here since she's an evil bitch who never cared about me, but she might because she's an evil bitch who likes to mess with her kids. I'm not taking any chances."

"I don't want to meet your mother!" Becky said upsettedly. "Make her stay away!"

"I don't want to meet her either!" GOB said. "Hide behind the bar."

Becky sighed and vaulted herself up over the bar.

"I want a drink now."

GOB had sever bodies ready. He handed her one. "I figure that if she comes in, I can throw a bottle at her and the bar will kick me out somewhere. That way I end up somewhere in town and she has to hunt me down again."

"But that means I'll have to deal with her and I can't meet your mom," Becky said fiercely. "And I hate getting kicked out of here."

"Why can't you meet her?" GOB asked. He was curious.

"'Cause," Becky said, narrowing her eyes.

"I just think that you could hold your own against her better than most people," GOB said. "It would be fun to watch you take her down a peg."

Becky didn't stand a chance against Lucille, but GOB believed it. That's what counts.

That made her smile. "She's your mother, though. I don't meet parents. And you will never meet my mom or daddy."

"Not a problem," GOB said. "I usually try not to do the parent thing." Far too often he ended up trying to do one of the parents. "A lot of people don't like me dating their eighteen year old daughters." The parents of the sixteen-year-olds were generally even stricter.

"I'm nineteen," she reminded him. "But yeah, no meeting of anyone's parents."

GOB blinked. He was pretty sure that Becky just directly implied that they were dating. "I was talking about girlfriends I've had in the past. Take one Christian daughter away from her family and you never hear the end of it."

"Parents are so demanding," she agreed, helping herself to another bottle.

GOB finished off his bottle and opened his third of the night. "She wouldn't even let me get to third base. Stupid God. But you're a lot more fun than she ever could be." He leaned over to try to kiss Becky on the cheek.

She, alarmingly enough, allowed it.

"Well, of course I am."

She paused.

"You...weren't here this weekend, were you?"

"Kind of?" GOB said. "I think I was my dad."

Becky looked startled. "Crap."

Thank you dear lady for being my mom,
you did all my homework you took me to prom,
and I was the only guy who got lucky that night...

Ah, Stephen Lynch...

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