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Mauvaise Chance Office/Lobby, Tuesday

Behind the counter, there is a newspaper. Behind the newspaper, there is a Guy With Tools. For once, he's not hiding behind it because Fandom Weirdness^TM or Twinkie-Kahluas made him do something embarrassing this weekend that he doesn't want to remember.

It's more the fact that there's a song stuck in his head, which is currently issuing forth from behind the newspaper at random intervals whenever he stops concentrating on not singing, humming, or whistling I've Got A Brand New Pair of Rollerskates, You've Got A Brand New Key, and he'd rather put off the mocking if he can help it.

[OOC: Bunnies, tenants, tumbleweeds, stone angels, whatever. Except for no stone angels.]

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Or whatever your comm-rated Xander-shaped needs might be.

"Hey, boss-man," Mel said with a yawn as she entered the lobby. "How's tricks?"

"I think that we should get together and try 'em out and se--- Mel! Tricks are, uh. Good. Good tricks. Top-notch ear-wiggling."

He lowered the newspaper and did just that.

Mel raised an eyebrow at that. "Did you just wiggle your ears at me? I didn't think people could do that."

"Well, youre actually kind of wiggling your scalp and your ears just move along with it." Did he study how to do this when he was ten? Yes. Yes, he did.

"Weird," Mel said standing still for a moment as if trying to wiggle her scalp or ears with no success. "Yeah, it's not working. I'm thinking you're just a mutant or something."

"You mean after all these years I actually have a superpower, and it's...wiggling my ears?" Xander sighed. "I liked it better when I could summon cable porn with my brain."

...

"Cable porn?"

"I had the power to change tv channels with my mind for like, a week. It was awesome."

"And somehow you always zeroed in on cable porn?" Mel asked with an amused look. "That might be more than I wanted to know about you, Harris."

"I was nineteen! And it wasn't always porn." Just a lot.

"Sure..." Mel said pulling herself to sit on the counter. "Whatever you say Harris. So if you had that power today what do you think you'd be switching to?"

"Better porn."

Mel clicked her tongue in mock disapproval. "See, and here I thought you'd be grown up enough to watch some documentary on how to make... pencils. Or something."

"Well, Extreme Makeover, Home Edition, sure. Carpentry porn counts."

"Carpentry porn?" Mel asked with a smirk. "I'm guessing in that genre 'getting hammered' takes on an entirely different meaning."

"I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about, Mizzzzz Fray. Wherever would you get such scandalous ideas?"

"Me? No idea. I'm just an innocent little flower who never dream to utter such a phrase."

"This is the part where I'm supposed to be cleaning my glasses, if I'm following the Watcher's Handbook."

"Maybe you should just clean your eye patch instead," Mel suggested. "And you have have a Watcher's Handbook? What's it like? Does it have entries about the various quality of different tweed coats? How to set yourself on fire whenever you meet one of your charges?"

"I'm pretty sure they added that one after my time," Xander answered dryly. "There's like, enough volumes of journals to make up the Encyclopedia Watcherannica, though."

"Have you ever cracked a page of the handbook?" Mel asked with a smirk. "Or have you just been playing it by the seat of your pants?"

"I read the chapter on how Slayers are supposed to be all respectful and non-mocky and stuff. When I asked Giles about it he couldn't stop laughing long enough to tell me how you're actually supposed to make 'em do that."

Mel snorted in amusement. "Wait? We're supposed to be respectful and stuff? Crap. That's gotta suck for you."

He shrugged. "Eh. My role models are Buffy and Faith - I'd know respectful from how?"

From Kendra, actually, but he blinked that thought away before he let himself wander down that particular memory lane.

Mel laughed for a minute before ending in one of those serious pauses that got kind of introspective.

"Um. I may not show it all the time? But, yeah. I do you know... respect you," Mel said sheepishly. "But if you tell anyone I'll have to beat you up. I'd totally lose cred."

"Okay now you're just scaring me." He made as if to feel her forehead. "You got a fever?"

"Aw. That was supposed to be a touching moment," Mel said with a mock-pout. "And then you're supposed to feel all glowy which in turn will motivate you to take me out for ice cream."

"Glowy? I'm touched--" Because he was. "--not pregnant. Not that I'm saying no to ice cream."

"Yay, ice cream!" Mel said throwing her arms into the air. "Bet they don't have that in the watcher thing-a-ma-jigger."

"I'm totally adding it, don't worry. When in doubt, bri-- uh reward your Slayer with ice cream. Possibly Twinkie-flavored."

"Best. Watcher. Ever," Mel said emphatically. "Your name will be legend."

"Apparently not," Xander pointed out, "since the entire chapter on DON'T SET YOURSELVES ON FIRE WTF that I'm planning on adding seems to have disappeared by your time."

"Maybe that's why I was sent back," Mel pointed out. "So you can send a message to future watchers to... oh I don't know. REMAIN RUTTING SANE?"

*ahem*

"Sorry. I still have issues."

"Right there with ya. Only not literally for which believe me I'm grateful."

"I've always appreciated your lack of desire to set yourself on fire," Mel replied. "It's one of your better qualities."

"Our lives are different than other people's."

"Good day," G'Kar greeted cheerily as he strolled through the lobby.

Xander, stuck on brand new key not quite as far under his breath as he'd have liked, looked up from his paper and grinned quickly. "Hey, there."

That was not a tune G'Kar was familiar with, but it sounded cheery all the same. "How is your day going thus far? Well, I hope."

"I've had worse," Xander answered with a nod, earworm or no. "Nobody busted out any windows or conjured up lions yet, so I think it's a good start."

G'Kar smirked. "Always find the good in everything. It is a good philosophy."

"Comes from have such a long string of choices for stuff today is better than, but I can't say you're wrong."

G'Kar nodded. "I know that feeling."

*whistles*

HAHAHA I HAVE EARWORMED YOU HAHAHAHAHA.

AND SO I PASSES ON THE CURSE!

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Mauvaise Chance Office/Lobby, Tuesday

Mock the Carpenter

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OOC

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