Turtle and Canary: Thursday

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"Oh my goodness gracious," Jamie said clicking his tongue in disdain as he looked at the can of beans in front of him. "Navy beans? How wicked and illicit!"

And with that he slapped a warning label on it:

PARENTAL

ADVISORY

Explicit Beans

He shuddered and then moved on to the magazine rack which caused him to gasp out loud. "How did I ever work in a place filled with such wickedness and SIN!" Jamie cried out as he began to put warning labels on the magazines. "Some of these people aren't even wearing socks! Let alone shirts! Dear, dear, dear."

PARENTAL

ADVISORY

Explicit Lack of Clothing

Apu pretty much ignored the whole thing because honestly it was better than dealing with Jamie than when he was normal. Even if he did have a warning label that said

PARENTAL

ADVISORY

Explicit Hindu Shopkeeper

Squishy Flavors: Vanilla, French Freedom Vanilla, Grape Judas Jehovah

PARENTAL

ADVISORY

Explicit Flavors OMG!

[ooc: Jamie is gremlin bit and thinks everything is filled with wickedness. And he's putting warning labels on everything. Yeah. I don't know.]

Comments

Mod Apu

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

He's so moddable.

Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

Chances are you'll get a warning label put on your forehead.

Re: Bug Jamie

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

...Okay, this? Turtle decided as she came into the store for a Squishy and just to make sure it was there because it was Jamie's day, warranted comment.

"Um..."

No one said it was an intelligent comment.

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"Hello, Miss Wexler!" Jamie said in greeting. "Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! Would you like a Freedom Squishy? It's almost sinful but not quite!"

Re: Bug Jamie

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

Miss Wexler? Miss? Jamie never said Miss. Still eying all the parental advisory signs scattered throughout the store, Turtle had to admit that a Freedom Squishy sounded nothing short of awesome. "Actually, yeah," she said, "that sounds good. Nice flavor choices today."

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"It was originally French Vanilla," Jamie said shivering with squeamishness as he got her a squishy, "But that kind of name would lead to immoral behavior and wickedness."

He shivered again.

"No warning label would protect us from.... The French."

Re: Bug Jamie

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

And while Turtle agreed with this wholeheartedly, she was still rather confused, because it was the sort of thing she wouldn't exactly expect from Jamie, but she shrugged, and figured this was a change for the good, really.

Although....

She eyed one of the warning labels on the gum. "'Explicit' isn't a French derived word, is it?"

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"Is it?!" Jamie gasped in horror as he started pulling out more labels to put on the labels.

Re: Bug Jamie

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

Turtle shrugged, sipping her Freedom Squishy. "I'm not sure; we could go check one of the dictionaries in the book section?"

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

Gasp!

"We can't look in those!" Jamie exclaimed. "Those have dirty words in them! Like 'nude'! Or 'naked'! Or 'banana'!"

In fact there were already warning labels on the dictionaries.

Re: Bug Jamie

[stocksgrrl.livejournal.com]

Turtle blinked at the dictionaries.

"Well," she commented with another sip, "you certainly were thorough, weren't you?"

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"Just doing my duty to make sure that people are aware of the illicit nature of the products they are buying in this den of commerical sin," Jamie replied earnestly.

Re: Bug Jamie

[not-fangirl.livejournal.com]

That was very, very likely.

"What's 'Freedom Vanilla'?"

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"It's like French but less wicked," Jamie said with a nod. "It's less explicit."

Re: Bug Jamie

[not-fangirl.livejournal.com]

She was still kinda fuzzy on what 'French' meant too, but that was an answer at least.

"When did you worry about wickeness?"

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"Gosh golly gee!" Jamie exclaimed. "Why wouldn't I be?"

He gestured at the magazine rack. "Just look at all that flesh being peddled."

Granted there were stickers covering anything that would be remotely considered illicit. Some that really weren't illicit but were covered by stickers just in case.

"It's just a shame. I'm sure it's affecting today's youth. First it's Harper's Bazaar and then..."

There's a shudder.

"Pornography."

Re: Bug Jamie

[not-fangirl.livejournal.com]

...

Temari just stared at him some more. "Have you gone insane?"

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"I'm quite fine, I assure you," Jamie said with a firm nod. "And while I may be working in a commercial den of sin I assure you that my moral fortitude has not been tempted in the slightest."

Re: Bug Jamie

[not-fangirl.livejournal.com]

Right. Of course not.

"Is that so?" She asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

Jamie gasped and looked away. "Please be careful of your arms! They are emphasizing your bosoms!"

Re: Bug Jamie

[not-fangirl.livejournal.com]

"You like them usually," Temari pointed out. "Remember?"

Re: Bug Jamie

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

Sokka strolled up to Jamie sucking on a Freedom Vanilla.

"You realize there aren't any parents around here, right?"

Re: Bug Jamie

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

"Clearly someone needs some guidance!" Jamie exclaimed and attempted to slap this sticker on Sokka's head:

Re: Bug Jamie

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

"Hey, how do YOU know my thoughts are sinful???" Sokka demanded, after he'd peeled the sticker off to look at it. "Are you suddenly telepathic or something?"

He sipped at the Squishy some more, and then added, "Besides, there's nothing minor about me."

OOC

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

This whole post needs a warning label.