http://solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] fandomtownies2011-02-26 10:48 am
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Trooper Station, Saturday

The past week had been quiet. One might say too quiet, but Vimes was not such a person. Oh no, not after having various children in his station, looking for their mothers and/or fathers.

This was just the break one needed.

Which meant he was just going to spend the day in his office, procrastinating doing the paperwork that was piling up.
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[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 04:51 pm (UTC)(link)
There was a knock on the office door where a man garbed in a black suit and sunglasses stood, a small box under his arm.

"Sam Vines?" he asked.

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 04:55 pm (UTC)(link)
"Vimes," he corrected, glancing up at the man. "With an 'm'."

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:05 pm (UTC)(link)
K pulled the package from under his arm and pulled down his sunglasses an inch or two to re-read the label.

"Right," he said with a nod. "May I see some form of photo identification?"

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:09 pm (UTC)(link)
"What for?" And where the hell was Ralph to keep random people out of his office? If that man was off at the coffee shop again...

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Turns out Ralph is easily intimidated by a man wearing black.

Go figure.

"Special delivery," K said hold the package up for Vimes to see. "Photo identification is required in such circumstances."

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Damn it, Ralph. Damn it.

"You're a mail man."

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:39 pm (UTC)(link)
"Postal inspector," K corrected with a flash of his badge. "Division six."

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:41 pm (UTC)(link)
"A postal inspector with a badge," Vimes replied, leaning back in his chair. "From division six. Where are divisions one through five?"

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:48 pm (UTC)(link)
"Not on this island," K said dryly. "I.D. please?"

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Right then. Vimes would just have to look into that.

"I have a badge. A portrait to go with it is a bit posh," Vimes replied with a false sort of cheer as he tapped the badge pinned to his shirt. "Don't you think?"

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 05:59 pm (UTC)(link)
"It's very... pretty," K deadpanned. "Though it hardly verifies who you are."

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:01 pm (UTC)(link)
"It verifies as much as your badge does you. Mr. Section Six."

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:24 pm (UTC)(link)
"Agent Mannheim," K corrected. "And I hardly make the rules, I only enforce them. You want the package? Or should I just hand it off to the guy in the white armor?"

Ralph would probably like the package. I bet no one sends him anything.

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:25 pm (UTC)(link)
"I thought it was addressed to me," Vimes countered. "Or do you just hand out mail to whomever you find with a 'photo eye dee'?"

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:29 pm (UTC)(link)
"Yeah, but he's less aggravating than you are," K deadpanned. "And if you are refusing delivery I'll need you to fill out some paperwork stating you have refused said package."

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:31 pm (UTC)(link)
"You can put that in the in pile," Vimes replied, gesturing to the overflowing pile of papers on his desk.

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:40 pm (UTC)(link)
"Not a problem," K said pulling said paperwork from his mail bag and putting it on top of the pile.

And then he took a seat.

"All forms must be witnessed and verified by a duly appointed member of the US Postal service. Go ahead. I can wait."

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:41 pm (UTC)(link)
"Of course," Vimes replied, pulling out a cigar to light. Because they were besties now.

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:43 pm (UTC)(link)
K put his feet up on Sam's desk, making himself right at home. "You guys allow smoking in here?"

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:45 pm (UTC)(link)
"It is my office."

And Ralph only complained in a passive-aggressive coughing way every time it happened. Like clockwork that was.

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:46 pm (UTC)(link)
"Good to know," K said taking a pack of cigarettes out and tapping it down bit.

Ralph could suck it.

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:48 pm (UTC)(link)
"New in town?" Vimes asked, taking a puff of the fine, camel dung filled Klatchian cigar.

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
K nodded as he lit up a cigarette. "New assignment," he said shaking out the match. "Main office has been receiving complaints about delays in delivery."

[identity profile] solesofmyfeet.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:53 pm (UTC)(link)
"According to our records it was previously run by one Moist Von Lipwig of Ankh-Morpork." A name like that was too unfortunate to be from anywhere else. "If it was run anything like back the city's, it ought to also be considered a museum of old mail."

[identity profile] old-and-busted.livejournal.com 2011-02-26 06:55 pm (UTC)(link)
"And what city would that be?" K asked cocking an eyebrow. "DC?"
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