fandomtownies | The Devil's Nest, Wednesday Evening

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The Devil's Nest, Wednesday Evening

Despite the fact that she tended bar Fridays at Caritas and was a vampire anyway, Eric was being stubborn about those under 21 touching alcohol on the premises, so Jessica was manning the door at the Devil's Nest. (And she totally hadn't sulked about that for a week.)

"Hostess" sounded better than "bartender" anyway, right?

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"After the Great Revelation, the various human legislatures went crazy with establishing new regulations to cover every contingency they could think of."

Eric snorted. "It was rather amusing to watch."

"Until the inspectors show?" she asked with a little smile. "The regulations don't surprise me, though. Given the chance, people tend to throw out rules like they're vying for some kind of award for it."

"Oh, the hundreds of pages of crap they came out with," Eric groaned. "You live such short lives. Why waste it on useless things like this?"

Sometimes he was still very much a Viking.

"I'm with you on that," she agreed, trying not to look too amused at that reaction. "Though the no biting in the bathrooms thing might be a good rule..."

"I'm having Pam send down a copy of our 'no biting on the premises' sign," Eric replied. "I thought it might reassure people."

Or really creep them out.

Probably the second thing, in Jaina's opinion.

"If it helps, I really doubt people'll be lining up for that," she said. "We've had vampires here before and I've never heard of any of that going on."

"Well most people who are into that sort of thing don't really want it advertised," Eric offered.

"I suppose they could be bribing the squirrels into silence..." No she didn't.

There were parts of Fandom Eric hadn't heard about yet.

"Bribing the squirrels?" he repeated.

"You haven't heard about them yet?" She grinned teasingly. "Hmm, do I tell you or let you figure this one out for yourself?"

"Tell me," Eric decided. "I'm quite pathetic when I'm sad."

"And we don't want that." Though she had a hard time imagining him sad or pathetic. "There is a daily radio broadcast reporting everything that happened that day, and the news is gathered by squirrels."

"And people here speak squirrel," Eric said dryly.

"Someone here probably does, but mostly you can get the gist of what they're saying," she said. "But they understand and write English. Though their spelling is atrocious."

"I'm pretty impressed that they can write at all," Eric replied with a little smile.

"To this day I'm trying to figure out where they learned that." She eyed him, saying, "I've never seen anyone take this so easily. No stares of disbelief? No accusations of hazing?"

"Oh, I've decided you're much too bright to try to haze a vampire," Eric decided. "In a townie with a band made of zombies, what's a few rodents here or there?"

Pause.

"I suppose I shouldn't eat them."

Or rather Bubba shouldn't, should he ever wander up to visit. Eric preferred his dinner with two legs.

"...The zombies or the squirrels?" Both disturbing, for different reasons.

"The squirrels," Eric said, shuddering. "I'm never going to be zombie hungry."

"Good. I'd never be able to look at you the same way again," she said honestly. "But don't eat the squirrels, either. First off, they're squirrels. Second, I don't think you'd like what started getting reported about you when the squirrels took their revenge."

Okay, so it wasn't great revenge, but they were squirrels.

"They would take vengeance?" Eric burst out laughing. "Really?"

"You laugh now," she said, laughing a little herself. "But wait till they report you dressing in women's clothing and picking up the troll janitor or something."

"The troll janitor," Eric repeated. "And people would believe this."

No. No one would believe it ever.

"They could. I don't think you've been here long enough to establish a reputation yet."

"I'll remember that," Eric decided.

Writing and reporting on the news was fine. Vowing vengeance was just strange, apparently.

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The Devil's Nest, Wednesday Evening

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