fandomtownies | Turtle & Canary; Saturday [ 06/04 ].

That rat in the ball had been lucky; Jayne was about to see what would happened when he kicked it out the window of the strange apartment he'd found himself in that morning (what had he done last night? There were lots of frilly lady things in there, so he figured it was something pretty damn good), but he got away and Jayne wasn't feeling too up to chasin' down a gorram rat. Leaving the apartment, he still had no idea where he was, but it was easy enough to find the general store so he could maybe get some supplies. And booze. And maybe guns.

"What're you lookin' at?" he narrowed his eyes at the guy inside, looking at him all funny when he came in. "You just keep sweeping."

And, sure enough, the man kept sweeping, which made Jayne wonder. "Get me something to eat..."

Sure, the man sighed, but, in a little bit, Jayne found himself supplied with some beef jerky and Funyons. He was snapping into a Slim Jim as he eyed the machine by the counter. "What's this?" he asked, and, almost as if on cue, a Squishy beverage was dispense for him.

Jayne decided that this place ruled, and, since he couldn't think of anything better to do, decided he was going to stick around a little. The man with the broom didn't even complain when he settled behind the counter, put up his feet, and started flipping through a magazine to ogle all the women inside.

Somehow, Apu just knew what was likely going on here. He'd been through this way too often.

Today's Squishy Flavors: Fruity Oaty Bar, Gorram Grape, Red

Turtle & Canary was open.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Thank you, come again!

Because he's likely to be so helpful.

It was entirely possible that RaboPlus could help Jayne though, if he was looking for a significant other bank that was.

Define bank.

Because Jayne was thinking of a couple of different meanings that had nothing to do with money, but everything to do with deposits and withdrawals. And no one could ever accuse him of being shy when it came to just staring and gawking a little.

The kind of bank who went out drinking with you, was available twenty-four seven, and didn't even require you to leave your primary bank...yeah this wasn't going to lead to any kind of misunderstandings.

RaboPlus wasn't fazed by the staring, she was used to that kind of reaction from people who only had boring banks. Instead she smiled at Jayne.

Edited 2011-06-04 15:08 (UTC)

Now that was Jayne's kind of bank. A small laugh escaped him as he got a smile, and he returned it to a smirk filled with enough licentiousness to make Hugh Hefner blush.

His chin lifted for a moment.

"Hey."

Perhaps she should have been worried about that smirk, but RaboPlus had a triple-A security rating, meant she could beat up ninja. Blindfolded.

"Hey." Don't question why a New Zealand bank had an Australian accent, she just did. "Are you sick of your boring bank?"

Really, the woman could have said any word, instead of bank, and Jayne would have substituted it in his mind with exactly what he was thinking right now.

"Yeah," he said, sitting up a little. "Pretty sick and tired. Gorram bank."

Sadly, reading minds was one of the few skills RaboPlus didn't have. So she was simply happy to find another potential customer.

"How do you feel about investing in the New Zealand agricultural economy?" That wasn't a euphemism.

Yes, it was.

"I'd love to invest in the New Zealand agricultural economy," Jayne was pleased to report. "All that...plowing, and stuff. Lots of...plowing, right?"

It wasn't. It really, really wasn't.

She nodded. "And sheep." Lots of sheep.

Liiiiiiiies.

"I'm good at plowing," Jayne informed her confidently.

He...wasn't going to ask about the sheep.

But the sheep were important! To the New Zealand farmers!

"I have incredibly good rates," RaboPlus told him, leaning forward. Interest rates.

"Yeah?" Jayne scratched his chin a little. "How good we talkin' here?"

Especially since he didn't really have a lot of money, so a woman with good rates was going to be nice on both his pockets and whatever else was in his pants.

"Currently eight percent." Which was a good return on anyone's investment.

This was starting to get a little too mathematical for Jayne.

"Eighty percent of what?" he asked. "I ain't too good with numbers."

"Your money." Duh. She was an investment bank after all.

"Like..." Jayne narrowed his eyes, as if deciding if figuring this out was worth it.

Yeah. Definitely still worth it.

"Eight percent of what I got?"

Considering he didn't have much, that was a pretty good gorram deal!

"Exactly, you get an eight percent return on what you give me." She was used to explain thing like this to new customers.

Unfortunately, the explanation wasn't helping much. "That it?" Jayne almost seemed offended. "Eight percent ain't that much; you look like you'd be pretty good at givin' a lot more than that."

RaboPlus wasn't just almost offended. "I have the best rates of any New Zealand bank!"

"Yeah, maybe," said Jayne, "but it sounds like they're crap compared to...other...non-New Zealand...bank thingies."

He had to admit, bank was definitely a new term for it, and here Jayne thought he'd heard everything.

"I hope you'll be happy with your boring bank then." She narrowed her eyes, maybe he was a ninja in disguise (or a mugger), then she could beat him up without feeling bad about it.

I hate you, work. HAAAAAATE.

Turtle & Canary; Saturday [ 06/04 ].

Mod your Shopping - 06/04.

Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

Re: Talk to Jayne - 06/04.

OOC - 06/04.