fandomtownies | The Perk, Saturday Afternoon

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The Perk, Saturday Afternoon

Today was, technically, Jono's day to work in the office at the Boards. But, with most of the island away enjoying tropical weather elsewhere, he hardly saw any point in sitting indoors staring at paperwork, accomplishing a great deal of nothing in particular.

At least, not when he could sit indoors and caffeinate himself with whatever happened to be the first thing that caught his eye. In the small sizes, of course, so that he could go back for seconds of a different flavour, and then thirds. He had a system, so help him, and he was going to get a feel for what he did and didn't like if it killed him.

... Considering the face that he made after sampling the salted caramel mocha, and the fact that he needed a moment to recover before he could get back to carefully sipping his way through the cup, it was entirely possible that it might kill him.

[Open, because it's Saturday, I'm at home, and I'm bored. Hiii.]

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Bruce had spent about a good hour wandering into the island and was feeling a bit chilled when he spotted the coffee shop.

Checking the small amount of money he had, a small coffee wasn't entire out of the question. Plus it would help him get his bearings on this place that wasn't on any map he had seen.

"Can I get a small coffee?" he asked the barista. "Decaf."

And then he spotted Jono and... well Jono looking like he did Bruce did a small double take before trying to snap his attention back to the barista.

What was this place?

What was this place?

One heck of a refuge for the most marvellous of freaks, it seemed. And this particular one was painfully aware of that double-take.

"Decaf?" He'd already been looked at. It wasn't as though speaking up was going to draw the man's attention to him any more than it had been three seconds ago, after all. "Sort of takes all of the fun out of it, don't you think?"

Bruce looked up at the young man talking to him and returned a sheepish grin. "Uh. Well. Doctor's orders," Bruce replied with a shrug. "Too much caffeine gets me... agitated."

And you wouldn't like him if he was agitated.

"Er... right..."

There was something about that face that struck Jonothon as at least passingly familiar. But considering this island, he was probably looking entirely too far into it.

... He wasn't acting like Professor Durden, so that possibility was out. Probably.

"I suppose I wouldn't want to pick a fight with a doctor, then. You new around here, mate?"

Better to just out and ask, rather than sitting at his seat and speculating.

No. Definitely not Tyler though the resemblance is amazing!

"Uh, yeah," Bruce said picking up his coffee. "Today, actually. Just kind of stumbled across it. I'm Bruce, by the way. What exactly is this place? I didn't see it on any map."

To Jono's credit, he only looked a little bit stunned as the little cogs clicked slowly into place. He hadn't had the pleasure of being personally smashed to pained little bits by the man, but it wasn't as though the government didn't keep a ridiculous amount of records on him. And Jono had served his time with the government, much as he was glad to be free of them now.

Well, then.

"Jonothon," he said, gesturing to the seat across from him. "A fellow stumbler, when it comes to this place. You've found Fandom Island. A bit of a lint trap for all the wayward idiots of the world who find themselves in desperate need of having the status quo shaken up on them a little."

"Fandom island?" Bruce asked as he took the seat. "Sounds like some comic convention or something. Are you saying this place like a dryer?"

"I nearly said 'grease trap,' but I like to think that we're slightly more hygienic than that around here."

Flattering, Jono.

"I'm saying... mostly that you're hardly the first person to just sort of find yourself here, and you're not bloody likely to be the last. Fandom just sort of pulls people in, mate. I just happened to find myself here one day, a few years back, too."

"Oh?" Bruce asked warily. "Is it some kind of trap? Once you get here you can never leave?"

Which might be good as long as he never transformed.

"Right," Jono replied, smirking faintly. "A regular Hotel California."

He picked up his coffee cup and swirled it around a little, watching the liquid slosh around for a moment.

"Really, it isn't anything quite so final. I came here, went to the school for a couple of years, and left when I graduated. It was circumstances at home that brought me back here." Wasn't it always? "There have been a few cases where people couldn't find their way home from here again, but that doesn't mean they're necessarily stuck here forever."

"School, huh?" Bruce said settling back a bit. "What kind of school is it? Is that the big castle I walked by?"

"That would be it, mate. It's a high school. Teaches everything from home economics and chemistry to slightly more specialized courses about madmen royals and a philosophy class that I'm... fairly certain is just an excuse to watch films for an entire semester."

Watching movies was a valuable life skill, shut up.

"All in all... it isn't a terrible place, though. Generally."

"Generally?" Bruce asked warily. "Sounds like a bit of a catch when it comes to living here."

"In my experience, it's a bit of a catch when it comes to living anywhere, mate. Wouldn't you agree?"

If this was that particular Bruce, Jono suspected that he'd concede that he had a bit of a point, on that topic.

"This place has its share of troubles, I'll grant it that. But I'd sooner be here than back in London, watching my bloody back all th'time. You," and there was a bit of emphasis on you, "might want to keep an eye out for some of the island's more insufferable quirks, but most of the time, what Fandom throws at people are really just minor annoyances."

Bruce's eyebrows went up a notch on the emphasis on the you.

"I tend to try and avoid minor annoyances," he said carefully. "And insufferable quirks. It usually doesn't end well for me."

He paused before continuing.

"But somehow I think you know that."

Jonothon at least had the grace to offer Bruce a wry smile before turning his attention back to his mocha.

"And I won't be the only one, I'd wager," he admitted. "But it isn't any of my business, just like it isn't anybody else's. That's another one of those crazy things about this place... It has a funny way of pulling in familiar faces. We've got a small army of X-Men here and a Norse god of mischief as well, what's the harm in one man with a dangerous temper if he's bent on sticking to decaf?"

There was an attempt at a mouthful of mocha. It mostly just led to Jonothon closing his eyes and inhaling deeply before continuing on.

Good lord, what did they put in these things nowadays?

"I can tell you one thing. Here, they're less prone to shooting at you. That always struck me as an upside, at least."

Bruce blinked once or twice at Jono's comments. "Well I don't know any X-men, gods of mischief and I prefer to avoid anyone from the army," Bruce admitted. "And you're right. My temper is a bit dangerous."

Bruce sighed and offered his hand for a handshake. "Dr. Bruce Banner. But I think you knew that."

"I had a hunch. Never had the pleasure of meeting you in person before." Jono reached out and accepted that handshake. Why the hell not, right? "Jonothon Starsmore. I have a bit of a reputation as well, but mostly it limits itself to the tabloids and unfortunate newspaper articles."

And it could bloody well stay there, too.

"Planning on sticking around, Doctor Banner?"

Bruce sighed. "I don't know. Where I'm from I'm not usually known on the tabloids except as a myth," he admitted. "And quite frankly I'm looking for someplace where I won't have any... entanglements with the US Military."

"Then here isn't a terrible place to be," Jono offered, his own voice dropping to something a little softer. "I'm not exactly their biggest fan myself, these days. We might get the occasional wayward soldier or recovering formerly brainwashed special agent looking for a safe place to lay low for a while, but the day you see tanks and helicopters around here is the day you get to see the entire population of the island stepping up and doing something about it."

He shrugged a little. "This place is our home. For a lot of us, it's all we've got. For the most part, it's safe. And when it's not... We handle it."

"Exactly what do you mean by it not meaning safe?" Bruce asked. "Because being possibly one of those things..."

"At the risk of sounding insane?" Jono held up a hand and started ticking things off on his fingers. "Angry vegetables. Goblins. There were a bunch of turtles and toothy mushrooms a while back. Nothing that you can't steer clear from if you put forth a decent effort. There are safe places all around the island, if you'd rather not fight."

And Jono really wouldn't blame him, if he'd rather not fight.

"The last time it turned really nasty, that was something that reached out and hit most of reality as we know it. So that's... not so much a reflection of our island, I don't think."

Bruce frowned at Jono. True he was a man who turned into a green angry giant when he got angry but...

"Angry vegetables? Are you pulling my leg?"

"Take a good long look at the both of us, mate, and tell me just what the odds are of me pulling your leg."

Jono was just saying, here. Really, now.

"Fandom's antics are strange, I'll grant, but for the most part? Harmless. The joy of living on a multiversal hub, I suppose. You trade in your concept of normal, and everybody just sort of... takes for granted that you are, too."

"Multiversal hub?" Bruce asked as he rubbed his head. "Trust me when I say that I traded my concept of normal a long time ago after I strapped myself into a chair and bombarded myself with gamma rays. A Multiversal island with angry vegetables is going to take a little while to swallow."

Jono's answering smile was a touch wry. The story was a little different, but the end result was the same. Something else he realized he was getting used to since Fandom became a part of his life.

"The angry vegetables are only occasional. You're about as likely to wake up to random fruits, or tiny penguins," he shared. "But if you were looking for a safe place to be, where nobody will bother you... here is it. Trust me, Doctor. The strangeness, you get used to. So far, I've found... it's worth it."

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The Perk, Saturday Afternoon

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