The Street Outside The Boards, Thursday Evening

[furnaceface]

To say that Jonothon was still somewhat out of sorts since the island had reverted back to normal on Sunday would be something of an understatement. Most of the week, he'd spent more or less just going through the motions. He'd checked in with the New Warriors, at least, let them know that he was still alive and that his being missing all last week was one of those crazy Time Travel Things That We Don't Talk About, and they'd all been more or less understanding, just so long as he got his head back onto his shoulders right before jumping back into the line of fire along with them again.

That had worked out well enough, really.

Tonight, he was finally trying to buck those motions that he'd been going through. He wasn't doing anything huge, or anything particularly shocking, but he was outside for a change, sitting in front of The Boards and idly tuning an acoustic guitar that he'd found buried under a stack of props in the back room. He wasn't busking, not really. He just needed to see the bustle of people on the street, and have the open sky overhead. Hiding himself away in his room hadn't done him a hell of a lot of good, after a week in detention.

[Open!]

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[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Skip skip hop bounce and flop down next to Jono. "Can you play any Voltaire?" Kenzi asked holding up an ice chai for Jono.

[furnaceface]

Jono glanced up at the request, his eyes falling first on Kenzi's face, and then on the latte, before a small smile worked its way onto his lips.

"Not while I'm holding one of those, I can't," he noted, attempting to sound teasing as he tilted his head thoughtfully. "Any in particular? I know Innocent fairly well. It's not too heavy on violin to be done on acoustic, either."

Honestly. Asking Jono if he could play something was like asking The Perk if they carried coffee.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"That'll work," Kenzi decided. "You get the drink after the song, then." It was kind of terrifyingly appropriate actually. She put the chai down next to him and started tapping her toes in the beat for the song.

[furnaceface]

Of course it was, which was probably why it came so easily to mind when she'd mentioned Voltaire. Jono paused for a moment, getting a feel for the beat she was setting, and then started to play.

"All the evil in the world
Pushing down on you
And all the venom in their words
What could you do?
What kind of ignorance
Causes them to be so,
So sick and vile and evil
You did nothing to them
It's just not fair, you don't deserve it."

Story of his life, really. Not that Jono tended to pay more attention to songs that spoke to him on a more personal level. Except for how he absolutely did.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi jumped in on the chorus. She wasn't wild about her voice, but this part was pretty easy. And she'd loved this song the first time she heard it last year.

It's not your fault
You're innocent
It's the world that's wrong
You're innocent

[furnaceface]

Jonothon couldn't help it, not really. But when somebody sang along while he was playing, he felt a little more free. He could relax, just so long as there was more song left to go. Hell, he could forget himself enough to let himself smile.

"When they scream and when they yell
And tear you down
They make your life a living hell
When they come 'round
There's nothing you can say
That doesn't contradict them,
'Cause all they want's a victim
On which to vent their rage
It's just not fair, you don't deserve it."

He was putting a little more into it with this verse, closing his eyes and just telling it as it was.

It was safe to say that he knew what he was talking about.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"It's not your fault
You're innocent
It's the world that's wrong
You're innocent
Just hold on,
You're innocent
Some day the world will belong
To the innocent"

The next part was the part that Kenzi identified with. All of it. But she kinda guessed that Jonothon got it even more than she did. Especially after last week.

"So let's wear black,
Let's blast The Cure and Siouxsie
Then we'll go see
The Rocky Horror Picture Show
And then we'll forget to go home."

[furnaceface]

"It's not your fault
You're innocent
It's the world that's wrong
You're innocent.
Just hold on,
You're innocent.
Some day the world will belong
To the innocent..."

Jonothon hung on that last word, let the taste of it linger on his tongue as he attempted to make that word say everything there was left to say. But that was the trouble with words, in the end. There was always something left to say. And so he inhaled, letting the song come to an end, and cocked an eyebrow at Kenzi.

"And th'verdict, luv? Have I earned that drink, would you say?"

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi handed over the chai and grinned. "Definitely worth a couple bucks of a drink. Maybe even one with booze in it, but I don't have any right now." She put on her shades and sighed, looking up. "It's good to be a perky goth in a free world."

[furnaceface]

"Mmm, jury's still out on being a sombre ex-goth in a free world," Jonothon mused, taking the drink with a wry smile. "When all's said and done, I suppose I'm more goth now than when I was goth in th'first place."

Or when he was a goth grunge punk angry metal mutant. Which was a genre that he'd coined all on his own, thanks.

"To what do I owe the visit, anyhow? Feeling social, in this brave new world we all know and love?"

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"See, maybe if you admitted you became a goth again, the world would look right." Kenzi took a slurp of her own drink. "Goth is just acknowledging that death and pain are there, so you might as well deal and not deny, am I right?" She grinned over at him. "Yup, social. Checking in with people. Seeing if they need more denial and need to visit Caritas tonight when I tend bar. Et cetera."

[furnaceface]

"If I were to make my way to Caritas tonight after th'sort of week we just got through, I'd need somebody to carry me to the bloody rickshaw so that they could pour me out back here by the time I decide I'm finished drinking for the night," Jono cautioned, though not entirely unpleasantly. He even tried another ghost of a smile before speaking again. "You know, I've courted Death before. If acknowledging her is all it takes to continue being Goth, I suppose I'm still more than most."

And the pang in his chest as he said that meant that he was no stranger to pain, either.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"Hey, that's what your friendly neighborhood bartender is for," Kenzi said, spreading out her arms. She smiled, taking the first part seriously, and pulling down her shades a little. "Dude, you're due. If you gotta, you gotta. I did all mine on Tuesday night and got wasted. And I wasn't even stuck in Detention."

Just putting that out there, yup. No need to get into it if he didn't want to.

"How'd you court Death?" Kenzi looked amused. "Give Death funeral arrangements?"

[trigons_child]

After a few days the memories of Umbridge's Fandom were starting to be less vivid, though the fear and self-doubt they'd caused lingered. Still, Raven finally managed to convince herself to come out of hiding and try to start to deal with what had happened.

Likely to the shock of absolutely no one, at the top of her list of people she wanted to see was Jono. She'd teleported herself into the Boards, found it empty, but heard Jono playing outside. Poking her head out the door, she watched him quietly for a moment, then said softly, "Jono?"

[furnaceface]

Jono started at the voice from behind him, not necessarily because of who it belonged to, so much as that he'd been so lost in the music that he was playing, and then going back again to tune an old string that was in sore need of replacing, that being shaken out of his reverie had managed to snap him back to reality before he was fully aware that he had.

A deep breath, then, before he turned to face her.

"Raven." He gave her a little nod. "You had me worried, luv. Th'notes on Tuesday said you had been talking about taking off again."

[trigons_child]

"I was," Raven admitted, stepping outside, a little skittish because she wasn't sure who else might pass by.

Her cheeks flushed. "I was frightened and upset. And Dinah agreed it might be good to go away. I did not wish to cause you or anyone else any further distress, but running away might have done just that. I was unsure what to do."

[furnaceface]

"Well... it's good to see you here and in one piece," Jono offered, along with a tired attempt at a smile. "You know how I feel about you leaving without word, luv. Learning about you running off over the radio does tend to make me worry."

[trigons_child]

She looked up from the ground which for some reason she was finding fascinating. "I am sorry," she said. "That was not my intention."

Her throat felt tight, and she took a breath to try to drive some of her tension away. It wasn't helping. "How are you doing?" she asked.

[furnaceface]

"Tired," Jono admitted, after another moment of silence. "I'm shite at sleeping after these things, I'm afraid. I keep... thinking."

Mostly about what his life would be like if he really had kept on in that other timeline. About what he would be like...

[trigons_child]

"So do I," Raven said. She'd tried meditating to refocus her thoughts, but even that hadn't chased her demons -- in a literal sense -- away. And sleep had been fleeting.

"I am sorry for everything I did." It hadn't been her. She knew that logically. But she had the memories and she knew what was inside her, and that had been gnawing at her since the world had returned to normal.

[furnaceface]

"The universe was kind to you, luv. The things you did are only a memory. Let's let them stay that way."

Some people didn't have the luxury of being able to say that, about the things they'd done that were beyond their own control.

[trigons_child]

Raven wrapped her arms around her self, shivering despite the warmth outside. "It is not that easy to forget," she said. "Part of me wishes I could. But I cannot. And I will not."

[furnaceface]

"I'm not asking you to forget." Jono shook his head a little, frowning her way. "I'm just asking you not to rip yourself apart over something that was undone. Say your apologies, by all means. Make your amends, if you feel you must. But that wasn't you. That wasn't you in a few ways. You were under her control, in a different timeline. Who that person was, who you were for that week, that's someone you were never meant to be."

[trigons_child]

Raven bit at her lip, tempted to point out the same could be said of him. But the situations weren't entirely the same, and she'd been fortunate enough to to have hers undone, so it wouldn't be fair to compare.

"There are some who would disagree with that," she said quietly. "Yes, my mind was torn asunder by madness and magic, my will was not my own and I was under someone else's control, but I did not have to enjoy it so much."

That was what had been weighing on her the heaviest.

[furnaceface]

Jonothon's eyes looked a little more tired, at that. A little more haunted.

"Neither did I."

And he had no alternate history, no years of a life steered in a completely wrong direction, to thank for that.

"How many years have you been here, now, Raven? How many years, building loving friendships, learning how to shield yourself so that you don't fall and do exactly those things? You've worked bloody hard to avoid a situation like that. That you fell into that one was something utterly beyond anything you could possibly have prepared for. And, most importantly, even though she had shades of you in her, even though her beginnings were the same, she wasn't you. Who she was and who you are? Two vastly different people."