The offices of Diamond Mine Cosmetics- Saturday evening

[solo_sword]

On the eve of her wedding, Jaina had plenty of things to do, which included doing some work at her successful and luxurious luxury cosmetics company. Also making a list of people who would be Ended because they'd failed at her wedding. But mostly doing work.

Or just sitting there and shuffling papers.

"Wait, this... This can't be right," she said, shuffling papers and looking up, confused. "Embezzlement? Is someone embezzling... from me?"


[Oh so open.]

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[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

"Mother! I don't know if you heard the oh so tragic news!" Howie said as he walked casually into the office.

[solo_sword]

Jaina looked up, very serious. "Which tragic news?"

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

"Cade died of a caffeine overdose in the school," Jessica said. "Tragically."

[solo_sword]

"Oh, I'm so sorry," said Jaina, whose characterization only allowed for false sympathy these days. "Would you like a hug?"

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

"Nah, I'm good. I mean, emotional. I'm far too emotional," Howie said. "You know how it goes."

[solo_sword]

"I do. I really do. I just hope the funeral doesn't coincide with the wedding," Jaina sighed.

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

"The priests around here have enough practice scheduling these things out, so I wouldn't worry about it," Howie said reassuringly.

[solo_sword]

"Good. I don't need any more problems," she sighed.

Way to make it all about you, Jaina.

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

"So who are you marrying this time? And how much is he going to add to my inheritance?" Howie checked. Was that a little blunt? Probably.

[solo_sword]

"Eric. And this has nothing to do with inheritance," Jaina said. Because it was hers. All hers.

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

Howie just had to outlive you, lady. How hard could that be?

"Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that. I was just curious," Howie said.

[solo_sword]

"Of course not. And anyway, wills can be so tricky."

Ooh, was that a threat?

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

No! Not until everyone else was eventually out of the way by someone's hand.

"Don't I know it," Howie said. "Fortunately it's not anything you or I have to worry about until you're extremely old and natural causes finally take you."

Or, like, 38. And 'being a Skywalker' counted as natural causes.

[solo_sword]

"Yes, of course." Marrying a Vampyr here, mind. Just saying. There were ways around that whole 'outliving Jaina' thing. "Such a long way away."

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

"I love you, Mother. And all of the opportunities you've given me," Howie said. "And I'm sure I'll love my new Daddy, too."

[nobloodymessiah.livejournal.com]

Eleanor knocked lightly on the door frame to Jaina's office.

"Is this a bad time?"

[solo_sword]

"Not at all," Jaina said, looking up from her embezzlement discovery. "How can I help you?"

[nobloodymessiah.livejournal.com]

"I just thought I'd stop in and give you my congratulations," Eleanor said, trying for a sweet tone. "I'd offer to design your dress, but it is a little last-minute."

Did Jaina know that Eleanor was now a famous fashion designer? Eleanor was really hoping that might bump her up along the line of succession some. Because considering the sheer number of Skywalkers, the odds of her ever seeing any of that sweet, sweet family cash was getting low.

Barring, of course, a horrible fire. That was Eleanor's back-up plan.

[solo_sword]

"Thank you for the offer. My dress was flown in from Paris, but that's sweet." And hopefully she wouldn't have lesbian sex in it before the wedding this time. "I can only hope everyone survives the wedding this time."

She said it like a joke. It was soooo not a joke.

[nobloodymessiah.livejournal.com]

"We'll all keep our fingers crossed," Eleanor nodded. "Oh, and there might be a little ... commotion tomorrow? Just to do with getting the Winchesters, that's all. I'll personally make sure it doesn't disrupt the wedding."

Really. For reals.

[solo_sword]

Jaina leaned forward. "What kinds of commotion?"

[nobloodymessiah.livejournal.com]

"The kind where I kidnap Grace Winchester, frame the werewolves for it, and become Anakin's favorite for all time," Eleanor said, unable to hide how smug she was.

The writers decided that she was calling him Anakin now because she was edgy like that. And because calling him great-grandfather made the soap-opera aging, like, really obvious.

[solo_sword]

Jaina stared at her. "As if Luke's not enough of a problem for us? He'll never stop digging into our business if you harm the love of his life. Never."

[nobloodymessiah.livejournal.com]

"We're not actually going to kill her," Eleanor said. "Just make the Winchesters think that. Then Luke can have her back, if he wants her so badly."

Ugh. A Winchester.

[solo_sword]

"It won't matter. You could be making things so much worse. For us," Jaina insisted. "And when it happens, you're the one who's going to take all the blame."

[nobloodymessiah.livejournal.com]

"This isn't my idea," Eleanor said, feigning a condescending degree of patience. "I'm just the one hand-picked to carry it out. If you have issues, take it up with Management."

Luke would get over it.

[solo_sword]

"You'll see, Eleanor," Jaina said with a sigh. "Just make sure it doesn't disrupt my wedding."

Or else she might have to go on the 'to ruin' list.

[nobloodymessiah.livejournal.com]

Eleanor should probably be on the 'to ruin' list pre-emptively. Before she got around to planning the fire that could wipe out most of the people between her and all that sweet diamond mine cash.

"Of course," she said, in her best fake sweet voice. "I wouldn't dream of ruining your happy day."

What was the over/under on body count, anyway?