Demon Marcus, Sunday

[myownface]

Ah, weird weekends. Weird, weird weekends. Sparkle would have been more worked up about the whole thing if not for the fact that Atton's counterpart seemed to have an... at least passably level head on his shoulders. Probably wasn't going to go running around the island causing mayhem or anything like that, anyway. That was reassuring, to a degree, and it would probably all be over soon enough. It usually was.

Anyway, he still had a job to do, so he was at work today, trying to coax tiny, tiny horses down from some of the taller shelves.

"If you crap on those sweaters, I swear to god I'll send you all to the glue factory."

Thanks, Fandom.

[OOC: Open! OCD-free!]

Comments

[saddeserthermit]

It had been a day, and Obi-Wan was officially done with the beige collection. He'd have been able to live with that shite if he was still on Perkium, but at this stage in the game he was mostly considering setting fire to the whole lot.

"Do you have anything that's not beige?" he said, stepping inside. "Or billowy?"

[myownface]

"How about tight and black? We've got tight and black," Sparkle offered, smirking as he did a once-over of...

Was that one of the teachers?

...

Still hot.

"Or baggy and in pretty much any colour of the rainbow you have your heart set on. We're kind of the place to go if the whole 'beige robes' thing isn't your speed."

[saddeserthermit]

"I'll take anything," Obi-Wan said, "Though if you've got leather pants or ripped-up jeans and a couple of highly offensive band shirts, I'm game."

Half of the wardrobe in the shack had been shades of off-white. He was so done with off-white.

[myownface]

"The more offensive ones are near the back," Sparkle laughed, forgetting about one of the tiny horses for the time being and making his way toward the more teenager-friendly selection. "And there are leather pants that should fit you, and a whole selection of torn jeans. Hell, I'm wearing a pair today myself."

... This was not a stretch for Sparkle, anyway.

[saddeserthermit]

Hey, Obi-Wan was grumpy and taken, or he might have even taken a chance to check that out. (And okay, he'd violated that rule once or twice this weekend already, but there were lines unless he wanted to turn into his father. Or Ben-Wa. Shudder.)

"Thanks," he said, immediately heading towards the back. "Did you know there are at least a hundred shades of off-white? I discovered that yesterday morning."

[myownface]

"These are the tough lessons that people learn around here," Sparkle replied, shaking his head. "It's kind of sad, man. Half the island running around in Jedi robes, like it would kill them to at least wear, like, blue or red or something."

Sparkle had feelings about colours. And Jedi robes.

[saddeserthermit]

"I used to wear them all the time," Obi-Wan admitted, sorting through several racks of torn-up jeans, "But I was on drugs at the time. What's their excuse?"

[myownface]

"They've probably been drinking the Kool-Aid," Sparkle decided, shrugging. "I don't know what makes the Jedi cling so hard to the whole... thing... they do. With the weird tunics and shit. I know there are decent clothes in the galaxy, I mean."

He'd been there! He'd seen them!!

[saddeserthermit]

"Honestly, I think it's easy access," Obi-Wan said, snagging two pairs that he approved of and then wandering over to the leather.

[myownface]

There was a long pause while Sparkle's brain wandered in all kinds of fun directions.

"... Easy access to what?"

[saddeserthermit]

"I know Qui-Gon doesn't wear underwear under there," Obi-Wan said, shrugging.

[myownface]

"... Jedi," Sparkle replied, blinking. "Guess they have to pass time somehow, just like the rest of us."

[saddeserthermit]

"He also smokes a lot of weed," Obi-Wan said helpfully, slinging a pair of leather pants over his arm. "Which might also explain the robes."

[dauntless-four.livejournal.com]

There were so many things to count in a store! Hooray!

The Number Four walked in (because of course it had legs) and gave Sparkle a big googly-eyed smile. "Hello, friend! I'm the Number Four!"

In case you couldn't tell.

[myownface]

Well... that was new, even for Fandom.

"... Are you sure? I mean, you could be a plus sign, or the letter U but just a little drunk. I might need to see some ID."

Sparkle enjoyed trolling. So sue him.

[dauntless-four.livejournal.com]

"I don't have pockets," the Number Four said, sounding a little panicked. "Or pants."

[myownface]

"Well, you're in the right place to get pants," Sparkle decided, looking him over. "I bet we have something in size four that'll really bring out your, um... hips?"

Did the bottom of the number four really count as hips?

[dauntless-four.livejournal.com]

"...sure!" said the Number Four. "I've never had pants before!"

The numbers and letters on Sesame Street were scandalously naked.

[myownface]

"Well, won't this be a treat, then?"

Sparkle paused, wondering if maybe he should go the hygienic route and give the large number some underwear before sending him to the dressing room, too.

...

He wasn't going to think too hard on that one. It was a four.

"Have you ever thought about what kind of pants you'd like to wear, if you could?"

[dauntless-four.livejournal.com]

"Plaid," the Number Four said. "With four colors!"

Of course.

[myownface]

Of course!

"... I think we might have some, like, pajama bottoms like that," Sparkle offered. "They have an elastic waist, so they'll probably stand the best chance at fitting you, too. Want to come this way and, um, count the colours to make sure they're what you want?"

[dauntless-four.livejournal.com]

"That sounds terrific," the Number Four said enthusiastically.

The Number Four said everything enthusiastically. It was part of his contract.

[myownface]

Hey, Sparkle really couldn't fault the guy for his enthusiasm. He laughed a bit, and led the Number Four over toward the fuzzy flannel pajama bottoms.

"... There are actually four patterns to choose from. I'm... kind of impressed."

[dauntless-four.livejournal.com]

"I have skills," the Number Four admitted.

[myownface]

"Yeah, but how many skills have you got?"

Sparkle was happy to start trolling again, yes.