Covent Garden Flowers, Saturday

[1000yearstoolate]

As the weather wasn't too bad, Seivarden put a few pots outside with plants that suited the temperature, and then pulled a chair outside and had her first cup of tea there, wrapped in a warm coat. Nothing seemed strange today, but she had learnt not to trust that, so she new she'd better enjoyed the calm while it lasted.

That turned out to be a good idea, as after lunch a soft drizzle began to fall inside the shop. Seivarden sighed, made another pot of tea while trying to hold an umbrella, and took a seat outside again.

At least she wouldn't have to water the plants today.

[Open]

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[somethingwithturquoise]

Ugh! Lady Summer had no idea how she'd wound up on this complete shithole version of Earth, but she was not happy about it one bit, and it probably had something to do with her brother's sniveling little viceroy, and when she figured out how to get back, she was going to introduce that worm to whole new forms of torture that they would make legends about.

Because in addition to clearly not having a single servant at her disposal to satisfy and serve to her every need, the food that had been provided for her was being very uncoperative. Was she honestly expected to catch and prepare her own breakfast? What sort of primitive, uncivilized nonsense was this? Sure, she'd do it, if she had to, like, whatever, but the food source had been extremely good at avoiding her and was now hiding in a vent somewhere and it was all very irritating.

So she begrudgingly left the apartment she'd found herself in to find either some suitable slaves or a workable solution to just get things done herself. Passing by what looked like a shop that sold plants and things, she stopped, getting an idea, and, curling her lip at the fact that there was another door that she had to open herself (she had to get some slaves around here and quick, but good luck finding anything remotely acceptable in a place like this), she stepped in and made her demands, giving the shopkeeper a look of barely veiled contempt after a quick assessment to deem her unworthy of possible enslavement.

"Please tell me you sell something here that's poisonous enough to kill a cat."

Yeah. Summer was pretty terrible in most other dimensions.

[1000yearstoolate]

Seivarden looked up and gave Summer an unimpressed look.

"What, you've taken up poisoning cats?"

She had taken upp wearing gloves at least, although Seivarden couldn't really complain about that.

[somethingwithturquoise]

And Summer met that unimpressed look with one of absolutely revulsion. Who was this miserable little peasant who thought she could talk to her, Lady Summer Smith, Blessed Sister to the Mighty Mort'dyb, All Sing the Benevolence of his Name and Countenance, as if she knew her? Disgusting, really.

"The live food source provided to me as proven....problematic," said Summer, lifting her chin, hoping this scab realized that she didn't owe anyone an explanation and she should be grateful to be blessed enough to receive one. "The only solution, then, is to put this insubordinate creature out of its misery, and then find out whoever is responsible for dumping me off in this miserable uncivilized dimension and force-feed those tainted vittles right down their traitorous throats!"

If she were closer to the counter, Summer would have pounded an angry fist on it, but since she wasn't, she just threw up her hands as if she was just so done with everything.

"2019!" she exclaimed. "The adorable hedgehog calendar in that poor excuse for a kitchen read twenty-nineteen! How do you people even live? Might as well just have shot me back to the Dark Ages!"

[1000yearstoolate]

Seivarden did worry a little about the cat, since Summer was clearly insane.

"I thought you liked squirrels," she said. "Yeah, this place is really uncivilized, just go get yourself a portal ticket back to wherever you came from. Everyone will be happier."

She glanced around at the plants. "If it's cat poison you want though, I have it."

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Excellent," said Summer. "I'll take as much as you can spare. Don't skimp."

She regarded the shopkeeper with another hard, suuuuuper judgy look before she added, "And tell me more about these portal tickets. I was under the impression that most versions of Earth haven't developed effective portal technology yet...especially not in twenty-freaking-nineteen."

[1000yearstoolate]

Seivarden rose from the chair and walked over to pick up a large pot of catnip.

"This should do it. Rub parts of the plants against things the cat likes and it will absorb the poison through the skin."

She didn't know if Summer was insane enough to believe this but it was worth a try. She held out the plant.

"A gift. I understand we have a very special visitor on the island today. Try looking for the Portalocity office if you don't want to stay though."

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Portalocity office," Summer repeated, nodding a little, as she took the plant gingerly and eyed it with significant suspicion. After all, she didn't have her slaves here to test it for potency. Subterfuge and secret poisonings and murder attempts were almost droll around the fortress, after all, she wasn't born yesterday, but she would at least consider it.

"I trust, then," she said loftily, "that this poison is only effective on felines. I have no personal attachment to any of the stuff in that apartment--whoever lives there has, like, really questionable taste, anyway--but unless I get this portal thing figured out, I still may have to..." Summer curled her lip at the mere thought of speaking it outloud "...crash there for a while."

[1000yearstoolate]

"Only felines," Seivarden assured her. She pulled off a leaf and rubbed it between her fingers. "Look. You can eat it too, but it doesn't taste good."

She smiled a little. Hopefully she could both save the life of a poor cat and annoy the life out of an insane, cat-killing Summer. The real Summer might even thank her later.

[somethingwithturquoise]

Oh, yeah, the real Summer would totally be scrambling for the chance to thank you for getting her already riled-up cat all hopped up on kitty crack, Seivarden. Real grateful.

Current Summer, however, was still not entirely convinced, especially since rubbing it between her fingers didn't exactly denote plant-to-skin contact. "You eat it, then," she said.

[1000yearstoolate]

Seivarden shrugged, put a leaf in her mouth, chewed and swallowed. It wasn't the worst herb she had eaten, and she had no problem to do it to make a cat happier.

Unless the catnip just gave Summer another reason to kill the poor thing. It was a risk.