fandomtownies | Turtle & Canary; Monday [04/12].

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Turtle & Canary; Monday [04/12].

Well, on the one hand, the store had apparently been home to eight little children for most of the weekend, but, on the other hand, they apparently mostly took after their dad, so the store was amazingly tidy and clean when Summer came in that day and realized the most challenging thing she'd likely have to deal with was not tripping over one of Apu's kids as she went about her usual Monday inventory and ordering duties.

Unfortunately, since there were nine Nahasapeemapetilons in the store, the obsession with fake holidays was in full effect, meaning there were discounts available to anyone wearing a star, Russian cosmonauts, street children, and on books and licorice.

It was all fun and games, too, until, after a quick trip to google, Summer pointed out that they'd clearly missed National Only Child Day, and so clearly, the only way to celebrate was to have a baby battle royale death match to which Nahasapeemapetilon had what it took to rise above the rest.

Apu was not amused, and Summer now had an obvious favorite among his kids thanks to the one who emerged not soon after weilding a spatula and a collander on her head, clearly ready for this supposed battle.

Today's Squishy Flavors
Baked Ham with Pineapple
Grilled Cheese Sandwich
Red

Turtle & Canary is open!

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Sometime during the morning a child wearing gloves and smiling brightly walked into the shop.

"Aunt Summer! I've been looking for you."

And ohhhhhh man was it a relief to hear the word 'Aunt' leave the mouth of any small person wearing gloves that Summer might have run into this weekend! She was actually really enjoying having a kid around that made sense and wasn't all sorts of weird and messed up for a change!

"Well," Summer grinned at the kid, holding up her hands as if in surrendering to this fate, "you found me."

And then gave the kid a critical assesment, tilting her head.

"You Seivarden's or Tisarwat's?"

Either of those felt like a pretty good guess.

Then she gasped.

"Or both?!"

Edited 2021-04-12 14:28 (UTC)

"My mother and Tisarwat? Do you really think that would happen?"

Yenaia hadn't really understood how completely unexpected some children who showed up here could be.

"Seivarden is my mother, we visit sometimes, you visit us. Since mother here doesn't know my other mother you probably don't either. I mean, you don't recognise me."

"Listen, kid," said Summer, who had absolutely no problem explaining the ridiculousness that was this weekend sometimes, "last year I got a kid with your mother and a stuffed cat, so I wouldn't rule out anything. And, yeah, definitely don't recognize you." Her smile went a little apologetic. "Sorry. What's your name, though? Who is your other mother, and how much time do you have, because I want to know literally everything about her."

Especially if it was stuff she could give Seivarden shit over later.

"You had a kid with my mother?"

This was hilarious.

"My other mother is Esaya, she's from Athoek and a musician. They met when Breq brought mother along to a concert."

Summer nodded at this information, as if unsurprised and...mostly satisfied with it.

"Passed the buck first chance she got," she noted, picturing a scenario where Breq was pretty much all but shoving Seivarden at musicians just to get rid of her. "Smooth move, Breq."

"What do you mean?" Yen asked, confused and curious.

Yeah, no, Summer was definitely not going into that with Seivarden's kid.

"Nevermind," she said, shaking her head and waving a dismissive hand. "It's nothing. So, why don't you tell me a little bit about what it's like where you came from? Obviously, it can't be too bad if I'm around."

Oh, no, Summer. No 'nevermind'.

"But what did you mean?"

She would get to the next part after that.

Stubbornness? In a Vendaii? Surely, you jest.

Summer snorted and shook her head again. "Just that it was good of Breq to make sure your mother probably got a little bit of a nudge out of her comfort zone to open herself up to new possibilities," she offered, generously.

"Sometimes she does get nervous about things. I still haven't told her that mother lets me jump off cliffs."

Maybe that wasn't exactly what Summer meant.

"Only when I follow her on tours on Athoek. We usually live on the station. Have you met Station? Do you have your spaceship?"

"I have not met Station yet," Summer said, because she was pretty sure she was going ot get to it eventually, if not in this timeline, then apparently at least this one. "And that depends. Is the ship I have where you're from pink? Or do I have an entirely different ship?"

She did understand, as she said it, that it could be possible for whatever ship Summer got next would also be pink. In fact, it was probably a guarantee, but oh well.

"Yes, it's pink!"

Yenaia grinned. "You should meet Station. And Mercy of Kalr. You know Breq, though?"

Summer nodded. "I do. Not well, but we did go to school here together for a hot second, and I definitely know about her. Your mother doesn't shut up about her half the time."

Which wasn't strictly true, but Summer was going to throw that bait out there to see if she got any nibbles on some juicy gossip on any intriguing entanglements or observations on that particular aspect of this timeline.

"My mother Esaya says that too," Yen said. "It's strange because I told you about that, a lot."

Summer would put good money down on the theory that Yen told her about it a lot because Summer still asked about it a lot. Like, any time she landed on whatever Station, it was general greetings, how are you, and ohmygod so have they banged yet??

So she took this news with a pleased, satisfied smirk. "That tracks," she decided, and probably said that phrase a lot this past weekend. "I mean, Breq and your mother definitely do seem to have a...very special relationship."

Which she felt was a very nice way of putting it.

"They do. I love Breq. But two years ago my mothers wouldn't speak to each other for a long time because my mother Seivarden got sick when Breq told her to stay on Athoek."

This was Summer, and not a random stranger, and Summer understood things.

"Dad's a fucking asshole," Holly complained as she marched into the store.

"For the last fucking time, we don't let normal kids making actual fucking volcanos in the classroom. Period," Barry said firmly. "It's dangerous and I don't want to deal with the fucking clean up."

Summer...may have been waiting and looking forward to this inevitable after-class visit.

"Awwwww," she gushed at what was pretty much a perfect greeting in her book. "We know that, sweetie, and that's why we love him."

She stepped over a Nahasapeemapetilon camped out in front of the Squishy machine (seriously, she should get Post-It notes and label them with numbers to keep them apart) to complete her response to give Barry a well-deserved kiss in greeting.

"Seriously, though," she added, "why not just use the danger shop at that point? Practically the same thing with none of the mess or third-degree burns. Plus, there's a good chance someone will reinact that one scene from the shitty Space Battles prequels while they're at it."

Edited 2021-04-12 15:21 (UTC)

"We were going to," Barry began, "but-"

"It's not the fucking saaaaaaaammmmmme," Holly complained. "Virtual reality is no substitute for actual fucking magma."

"That," Barry said jabbing his thumb at Holly with highly amused exasperation on his part. "So if we couldn't have real? She wasn't having any of it."

"You and Morty Jr. are exactly the same," Holly pouted. "You blow up one Malibu Stacey diorama and you never hear the fucking end of it."

Edited 2021-04-12 15:28 (UTC)

"That's my girl," Summer smirked proudly. "None of that fake shit, accept no substitutions, but I don't know if sulking about it's a cute look, Hol."

But the rest of it made her quirk her brow a little.

"Morty Jr., though? His Gazorpian kid with the sex doll? Or is this, like, another Morty Jr., because I would not put it past my brother to have forgotten he already had one of those," and it might not have even been his fault!, "or to just not be creative enough to come up with another name. Nope. Never mind. I'm almost positive that that is exactly what happened now."

Holly sighed. "Mother, I've already said too much about the future. To tell you about the parentage of Morty Jr. could disrupt the timeline on a universal scale."

"Which means it's probably creepier than all fuck," Barry said with a slight shiver.

Summer was just going to quirk an unimpressed eyebrow at Holly for a moment. Boy, she really did seem to take this version of her parents for a bunch of suckers, didn't she?

"Oh, yeah," she said, "I bet you were real concerned about maintaining the intergrity of the timeline the second you decided to hop right on through that portal that took you here like you couldn't possibly have known where it would take you. And don't give me some ~~meta for~~Back to the Future bullshit like you had to do this to ensure your existence or whatever, because infinite realities mean infitite possibilities where you could tell us the exact DNA sequence of every Morty Jr. in existence and it wouldn't make a damn difference in most of them.

"But your dad has a point," she added, supressing her own shudder, "ignorance is probably bliss in this case, so, yeah, no, I'm good.

"Also, Mother? What am I? Fifty, and this is some Dickensian nineteenth century drama where one of us is about to die of consumption and you've definitely contracted the black lung because we had to send you to the coal mines to make ends meet?"

"Well... not in this timeline," Holly said, adjusting her glasses and lab coat for maximum adorability.

Like 25% more cuteness than before. She had it calculated out.

"Plus Morty Jr. is a creep in every timeline."

"Yeah," said Summer. "That tracks."

Because what else was there to say in that regard?

Barry cleared his throat. "Okay. So. About that fucking unicorn thing," he said sensing that perhaps a change of topic was in order. "I get you think it's adorable and all but that experiment has Cronenberg film written all fucking over it. So. When you were off with your mom? I worked on this for you."

He put his fingers in his mouth a let out a sharp whistle. A moment later a small pink colored robot unicorn with wings zoomed into the room and began zooming around Holly in circles shouting "Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi!"

Holly let out a gasp of excitement.

"And it shoots glitter lasers. That won't kill anyone." he added.

"Yeah," said Summer, "I give it about ten minutes after she gets home before that changes..."

But despite the wryness in her voice, it was absolutely impossible not to watch something like that and become instantly enamoured by the whole thing. Like, god, the things Summer would have done at Holly's age to have a robotic flying unicorn with glitter lasers, damn.

She smiled over at Barry. "I'm pretty sure," she said, "that that is the most fucking adorable thing I have ever seen."

And she wasn't talking about the unicorn itself.

Holly grabbed Ultron-Sprinkles in her hands and giggled.

Yes. It may not be the Sprinkles she wanted but it was most definitely the Sprinkles she deserved. Soon to go into the collection of all the other AU Sprinkles from all the other AU parents.

It was then she looked up and saw the adoringly sweet looks AU Dad and Mom were giving each other.

"Ew. Are you two going to bone? Because drop me off at the portal now because I do not care for that fucking vibe."

If there was any doubt this kid came from Summer and Barry, it was definitely cleared up by this last stateemnt.

Edited 2021-04-12 19:53 (UTC)

"That fucking vibe," Summer pointed out, "is the whole reason you even exist, little lady."

A pause.

A few potential scenarios where she could, theoretically, exist without it. And so, a correction:

"Probably the whole reason you even exist. What?" Summer smirked, unable to help herself, going to loop her arm around Barry's and leanin ginto him because she figured she could probably kill two very different birds with one stone right now. "You're saying you don't want a big brother?"

Barry laughed.

And laughed a bit harder when Holly started shouting "Ew! Ew!Ew!Ew!Ew!Ew!"

Barry looped his arms around Summer and smirked. "I'm thinking at least two more right?"

Holly glared at both of them. "That's not going to happen because then we'll outnumber you."

Barry frowned at that. "Not all of them can be geniuses, right?"

"There's got to be a certain statistical chance that one of them could be like a Morty," said Summer, who was clearly going to leave that calculation to the geniuses and also did not care that Morty was getting dragged through the mud a lot in this conversation; it wasn't like any of it was, like, untrue. Second case in point: her father. "We could be playing with fire. So the real question is...is that a risk we're willing to take?"

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Turtle & Canary; Monday [04/12].

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